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Any suggestions/strategies for bathing?
Mom is refusing help with bathing. She gets a CNA every morning through Medicaid because of physical disabilities she is in denial about (mobility/fall risk and vision). She is exceptionally stubborn about bathing. And she is suffering because of it. Here in Colorado it’s very dry and her skin is dry and she’s itching a…
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Where will she go? Where CAN she go?
Well it appears that MIL's extended stay at Sib #1's house will be short lived. Sib #1 and spouse are saying that it's too draining on them and that they can't handle MIL's revisions of family history and constant messiness. DH and I have already boxed her stuff up and DH has let it be known that MIL cannot and will not…
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Poem I wrote about my mom
What is she looking at? Who does she see? Does she know who I am when she’s looking at me? I am her daughter, the youngest of two. She shakes her head no but I swear it is true How could this happen, how could it be? My mother not knowing it’s me that she see’s I then ask her, who am I ,what is my name? She answers…
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need help getting the real story from my mom
Hi guys, new member. My mother has dementia and has recently been put into assisted living. She keeps calling us saying that she needs to go to a hospital, but she can't tell us what is wrong. I don't know what "hospital" means to her or what she expects to have done at a hospital. She only respects the opinion of men, so…
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Parkinson's Drug Tied to Increased Hospitalizations, Death
https://www.medpagetoday.com/neurology/parkinsonsdisease/94081
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Jo C. Hello from SuperWoman!
Time has marched, ran, and flown by at warp speed! Its been a long while since I have been able to drop in and say hi. Yet my thoughts have turned to you so often, Johanna. Your words brought peace and hope into my life at a convergence of my mother in laws alzheimers, my sons autism, bi-polar and schizophrenia, and my…
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An existential question re: my neighbor
I posted about my neighbor earlier. She is 89, a widow of one year, lives alone with her little dog. She has no children; her late husband has an elderly cousin. She is housebound, but has someone do her grocery shopping and a friend come to visit every week. I call her every day. She has returned to asking, why is she…
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Facility Suggestion
Hi everyone !! Last we checked in was a few months ago and we were having problems. I have been meaning to check in but haven't had the time since I myself have started a job on top of my other activities. Today we got notice that we have to search for a nursing home as the current location is giving him the notice of…
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book suggestion
I just finished reading The Caregiver's Guide to Dementia by Gail Weatherill. Lots of good information.
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Mom living with a friend/not a good situation/don't know what to do
Mom recently sold her home. She chose to live in a casita at a friend's house, even after being presented with other options. The friend has alienated me from my mom. Mom does not want to leave. I'm frustrated and don't know what to do. Mom has been diagnosed as early stages of dementia. This is like a nightmare that never…
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move(
Sorry, a little long. My step father has been in AL for 2 years now. I believe he is in the middle stages of Alz and yes he was diagnosised. He dresses and feeds himself. He does have problems remember to bathe, forgetting he has dentures and incontinence. I live 2 hours away and only put him in this AL because rest of the…
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Losing ability to use hands?
Here's a question for you folks with a family member with advanced dementia: have you noticed that they've lost the ability to use their hands? My mom has arthritis in her hands. She blames the arthritis for not being able to do all sorts of things. But I'm been wondering whether the real problem is that she's losing the…
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How important are neurologists/MRIs, etc?
We live in a small town, a long way away from any gerontologists or specialized medical centers. I've been going with my parents to their doctor appointments for the last few years to "take notes". Both my parents have cognitive problems (AD and brain injury/surgery). The neurologist first told my mom that she was fine…
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Normal Aging or Early Dementia
My mom is 79 and is the sole caregiver for my father. My father is disabled (from previous stroke) so my mom does all the cooking, shopping and cleaning. She is very active physically and socially. She goes out to lunch or breakfast several times a week. Within the last 6 months I've noticed some memory issues but not sure…
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Aricept and depression
My mom is 84 and was prescribed Aricept last month (July). Her and my dad live in a independent/assisted living facility. They moved in last February. Mom was doing fairly well when they moved in but has declined kind of rapidly over the last few months. Most recently she’s gotten very depressed and I’m wondering if the…
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Nursing home as a representative payee
I am my mother's Social Security representative payee and she is on Medicaid. The nursing home has said they can be her representative payee and do the paperwork and that will let them reapply for Medicaid for her. Does anyone have any opinions on that?
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How to deal with a parent not self-aware
Hello everyone,my father is showing signs of Alzheimer for the symptoms we can observe. Also his father, my grand-father, has also spent the last years of his life with Alzheimer. This has been the greatest fear of my father: to end like his father did. Sometimes he confessed this to his wife, my mother, that he prayed God…
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Bogged down - bad and good
I hope everyone has been able to do a little thriving while dementia caregiver surviving. Two things have kept me from checking in with you all the last couple of months. Here's the first one... blindsided by all the suck. The Estate Sale https://www.stumpedtowndementia.com/post/the-estate-sale Wine, Women, and Dementia is…
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excellent source of Support that I have found
I am fairly new to finally acknowledging my DH is suffering from dementia - probably alcohol induced + brain injury when he almost died from pancreatitis in 2018 (was on vent, had hit his head before he finally went to the hospital). I have been consuming anything I can to help in this journey (probably very early, reading…
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Dealing with a healthy parent in denial about spouse
Hi all, respectfully asking for help in dealing with my healthy father who appears to be in denial about my mother. She has had progressing dementia for about two years. It has reached the point of one worded answers with mom and answers that do not make sense. Sometimes staring. Complete confusion for her regarding…
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Very new to this, want to help my parents as much as possible
My dad has recently been tested for Alzheimers/Dementia - by this I mean he had 2 tests so far that are the standard tests with the drawing the time on the clock and he failed every aspect of the test except for knowing my mother and how to write his name. He was recommended to get an MRI and I guess start the process of…
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Best clothes and shoes
Helping my mom get dressed is increasingly becoming a struggle. She is pretty resistant to changing her clothes (both getting dressed and undressed). Does anyone have specific recommendations (brands, styles, etc) that work well for someone who needs help getting dressed? Stepping into pants and underwear is hard, and she…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 8/12/21
Philippians 4:13 Good News Translation "I have the strength to face all conditions by the power that Christ gives me." me: Maybe you have learned this quicker than me. We can remain at peace during hard times and illness with God's power, wisdom and strength, not our own. So whenever life seems impossible let's ask the…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 8/13/21
LOYAL TO GOD * GOD THOUGHT: 2 Chronicles 16:9 NIV “For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him…” * VICTORY GOAL: I am committed to loving and serving the Lord. * POWER PRAYER: Holy Father, may You find my heart and mind fully committed to You, so I gladly…
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Food delivery & caregiver fights
I'm struggling to care for my mom long distance. My aunts handle most of her care (groceries, laundry, simple prepped meals, refill pill box, etc), but my mom is getting increasingly angry with one of my aunts in particular & she is now scared to go to my mom's house. We have a caretaker 2 days/week for a few hours, but…
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Maintaining mobility - walking frequency?
Recently we're noticing more slips and near-misses on walking down stairs and steps and balance checks while standing/walking with our Dad, and it makes me worry that the disease might soon attack his mobility and balance. We see other signs of Stage 6 like urinary incontinence and increasing challenges with communication…
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Fainting/ER/Pacemaker
89 year old mom with history of fainting (low/high blood pressure, diabetes...) fainted and hit her head yesterday. She was taken to the ER by ambulance and admitted to the Critical Care Unit overnight for observation and possible scheduling of pacemaker. I sent her PCP a message stating my concerns (pros/cons of…
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Smooth flight, tough transition
Well, we got Dad to his new home in a memory care unit in NY, 5 mins from my sister. The whole process of COVID testing, getting on the flight, flying to NY, driving to the facility and getting him in went surprisingly well - the staff at this place are amazing, they all came out to greet him and created a positive wave…
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Behavioral Health Assessment
Hello All, It's been quite a while since I last asked for advice. Mom was moved into MC this April from her IL apartment. It was the decision of the facility after she refused any type of help or assistance from family or paid caregivers. She is high functioning, has excellent verbal skills and is in good physical shape,…
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Why prolong the inevitable?
Hello, I'm new to the forum here. I'm 53, my wife is 54. Nine years ago she was diagnosed with MCI, which progressed to the stage of being diagnosed with Alzheimers two years ago. She's lost so much. She is now in the middle stages of the disease. I think they're going to pull her drivers license. She doesn't know what…