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book suggestion
I just finished reading The Caregiver's Guide to Dementia by Gail Weatherill. Lots of good information.
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Mom living with a friend/not a good situation/don't know what to do
Mom recently sold her home. She chose to live in a casita at a friend's house, even after being presented with other options. The friend has alienated me from my mom. Mom does not want to leave. I'm frustrated and don't know what to do. Mom has been diagnosed as early stages of dementia. This is like a nightmare that never…
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move(
Sorry, a little long. My step father has been in AL for 2 years now. I believe he is in the middle stages of Alz and yes he was diagnosised. He dresses and feeds himself. He does have problems remember to bathe, forgetting he has dentures and incontinence. I live 2 hours away and only put him in this AL because rest of the…
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Losing ability to use hands?
Here's a question for you folks with a family member with advanced dementia: have you noticed that they've lost the ability to use their hands? My mom has arthritis in her hands. She blames the arthritis for not being able to do all sorts of things. But I'm been wondering whether the real problem is that she's losing the…
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How important are neurologists/MRIs, etc?
We live in a small town, a long way away from any gerontologists or specialized medical centers. I've been going with my parents to their doctor appointments for the last few years to "take notes". Both my parents have cognitive problems (AD and brain injury/surgery). The neurologist first told my mom that she was fine…
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Normal Aging or Early Dementia
My mom is 79 and is the sole caregiver for my father. My father is disabled (from previous stroke) so my mom does all the cooking, shopping and cleaning. She is very active physically and socially. She goes out to lunch or breakfast several times a week. Within the last 6 months I've noticed some memory issues but not sure…
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Aricept and depression
My mom is 84 and was prescribed Aricept last month (July). Her and my dad live in a independent/assisted living facility. They moved in last February. Mom was doing fairly well when they moved in but has declined kind of rapidly over the last few months. Most recently she’s gotten very depressed and I’m wondering if the…
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Nursing home as a representative payee
I am my mother's Social Security representative payee and she is on Medicaid. The nursing home has said they can be her representative payee and do the paperwork and that will let them reapply for Medicaid for her. Does anyone have any opinions on that?
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How to deal with a parent not self-aware
Hello everyone,my father is showing signs of Alzheimer for the symptoms we can observe. Also his father, my grand-father, has also spent the last years of his life with Alzheimer. This has been the greatest fear of my father: to end like his father did. Sometimes he confessed this to his wife, my mother, that he prayed God…
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Bogged down - bad and good
I hope everyone has been able to do a little thriving while dementia caregiver surviving. Two things have kept me from checking in with you all the last couple of months. Here's the first one... blindsided by all the suck. The Estate Sale https://www.stumpedtowndementia.com/post/the-estate-sale Wine, Women, and Dementia is…
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excellent source of Support that I have found
I am fairly new to finally acknowledging my DH is suffering from dementia - probably alcohol induced + brain injury when he almost died from pancreatitis in 2018 (was on vent, had hit his head before he finally went to the hospital). I have been consuming anything I can to help in this journey (probably very early, reading…
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Dealing with a healthy parent in denial about spouse
Hi all, respectfully asking for help in dealing with my healthy father who appears to be in denial about my mother. She has had progressing dementia for about two years. It has reached the point of one worded answers with mom and answers that do not make sense. Sometimes staring. Complete confusion for her regarding…
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Very new to this, want to help my parents as much as possible
My dad has recently been tested for Alzheimers/Dementia - by this I mean he had 2 tests so far that are the standard tests with the drawing the time on the clock and he failed every aspect of the test except for knowing my mother and how to write his name. He was recommended to get an MRI and I guess start the process of…
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Best clothes and shoes
Helping my mom get dressed is increasingly becoming a struggle. She is pretty resistant to changing her clothes (both getting dressed and undressed). Does anyone have specific recommendations (brands, styles, etc) that work well for someone who needs help getting dressed? Stepping into pants and underwear is hard, and she…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 8/12/21
Philippians 4:13 Good News Translation "I have the strength to face all conditions by the power that Christ gives me." me: Maybe you have learned this quicker than me. We can remain at peace during hard times and illness with God's power, wisdom and strength, not our own. So whenever life seems impossible let's ask the…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 8/13/21
LOYAL TO GOD * GOD THOUGHT: 2 Chronicles 16:9 NIV “For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him…” * VICTORY GOAL: I am committed to loving and serving the Lord. * POWER PRAYER: Holy Father, may You find my heart and mind fully committed to You, so I gladly…
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Food delivery & caregiver fights
I'm struggling to care for my mom long distance. My aunts handle most of her care (groceries, laundry, simple prepped meals, refill pill box, etc), but my mom is getting increasingly angry with one of my aunts in particular & she is now scared to go to my mom's house. We have a caretaker 2 days/week for a few hours, but…
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Maintaining mobility - walking frequency?
Recently we're noticing more slips and near-misses on walking down stairs and steps and balance checks while standing/walking with our Dad, and it makes me worry that the disease might soon attack his mobility and balance. We see other signs of Stage 6 like urinary incontinence and increasing challenges with communication…
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Fainting/ER/Pacemaker
89 year old mom with history of fainting (low/high blood pressure, diabetes...) fainted and hit her head yesterday. She was taken to the ER by ambulance and admitted to the Critical Care Unit overnight for observation and possible scheduling of pacemaker. I sent her PCP a message stating my concerns (pros/cons of…
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Smooth flight, tough transition
Well, we got Dad to his new home in a memory care unit in NY, 5 mins from my sister. The whole process of COVID testing, getting on the flight, flying to NY, driving to the facility and getting him in went surprisingly well - the staff at this place are amazing, they all came out to greet him and created a positive wave…
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Behavioral Health Assessment
Hello All, It's been quite a while since I last asked for advice. Mom was moved into MC this April from her IL apartment. It was the decision of the facility after she refused any type of help or assistance from family or paid caregivers. She is high functioning, has excellent verbal skills and is in good physical shape,…
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Why prolong the inevitable?
Hello, I'm new to the forum here. I'm 53, my wife is 54. Nine years ago she was diagnosed with MCI, which progressed to the stage of being diagnosed with Alzheimers two years ago. She's lost so much. She is now in the middle stages of the disease. I think they're going to pull her drivers license. She doesn't know what…
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Swimming- Public Pool
My father is the primary caregiver for my mother who is in middle stage of Alzheimer's. I am very frustrated since I do not have control over her care. I am questioning if my father has his own cognitive issues and in my opinion is making poor decisions. When I went to visit with my parents this weekend, my mother couldn't…
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Test show no brain problems
Went to neurologist last week. On the way my partner had one of his verbal attack episodes to the point I cried the whole way there. They went over the eeg test, mri, and blood work. They said the test showed no problems with his brain and only thing showing up in blood work was thyroid problem. So my partner said he…
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Moving parents to MC from their home
Both of my parents are being treated for dementia. Mom longer than dad. Mom has no short term memory. Dad is catching up with her. Dad and I discussed making move to AL/MC to keep mom safe. He asked me to find an "apartment" for them. Visited many in the area. Found the one I thought was best. Put down deposit. Visited the…
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It’s the dreaded … MCI diagnosis
So today was interesting, sad and aggravating all at the same time. It was the neurologist appointment that my mom has dreaded for weeks. When I called to tell her I’d be there shortly, she didn’t want to go. Big surprise. We had the typical difficulties with transporting the walker, walking to the actual office etc. The…
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Pending Federal Nursing Home Overhaul Bill
https://www.yahoo.com/news/nursing-home-overhaul-bill-boost-170022034.html
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Sexual contact in MC
Yesterday, my mother's MC called to tell me that a caregiver found my mom in another male resident's room with his pants down and my mom was touching him. The incident had happened late the prior day, and neither party remembered it the next day (my mom is like stage 6 dementia now). MC reported the incident to social…
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MIL wakes up asking for dead husband
This is my first post and we are looking for some help. My MIL who has an unspecified dementia frequently wakes up and asks for her husband who's need dead for 15 years. We've tried to give her vague answers, like he's home while you're visiting us, don't seem to help. She wants specifics. And unfortunately she's sharp…
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Evening agitation
My DH who has AZ is beginning to display quite a bit of agitation in late afternoon into the evening. This is new stage for us. Does anyone have suggestions how or what I can do lessen the agitation? Thank you. karenhag