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24/7 Care at Home
Has anyone managed to provide high quality care AND keep their loved one at home long term? We have a caregiver who comes 4 times a week to relieve my dad, but we are approaching the point where my mom will need more skilled care. Does 24/7 in-home care even exist? Has anyone successfully kept their loved one at home as…
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Supporting unmarried 70 yo cousin who has dementia
Hello everyone - I am seeking guidance/advice as my family starts on this journey. My nearly 70 year old cousin is showing all the signs of dementia. It runs in her family; in fact her older sister has been in a memory care facility for several years. She never married and has no children. She understands that she is…
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Delusions, Paranoia and Destructive Behaviors
My sister was diagnosed with Alzheimer's 1.5 years ago. For several years, she exhibited OCD behaviors, which gradually got worse. She is now at the point where she unpacks and repacks the contents of her dressers and file cabinets and closets, and then doesn't remember where she put the items, so she accuses her husband,…
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eating dog treats & getting multiple drinks
A few months back, during 2020, DH installed cameras around the property and in our kitchen. Yesterday evening when reviewing the kitchen camera footage during a period of time she was alone in the house he noticed MIL getting the dog's treats out of the pantry and eating a couple of them. He asked her about it and she…
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How to handle hallucinations?
Mom has been diagnosed with Vascular Dementia (about 5 years). She has gone into the "hallucination" stage when sometimes gets distressful to the point where we have had to experiment with meds. She is 96, so obviously does not tolerate meds very well. First was Seroquel and Namenda. Her hallucinations went off the chart.…
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Tips for placement AL or MC and how to transition an unwilling mother
Thank you for any suggestions or tips on how to identify a long-term care community for a very independent woman with dementia who is in full denial of impairments. She is currently high-functioning and I am not dealing well with the idea of moving her against her will and limiting her freedom so dramatically. I am…
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Just so sad - my daddy is in the late stages
I'm feeling overwhelmingly heart broken. It's so painful to see him like this. He's sleeping most of the time now. Unable to walk. I miss him so so so soooooooo much and I want to scream because of how much it hurts. I don't know how long this will last and it's agonizing. He was my favorite person. I'm so so sad. Some…
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New to all of this(3)
Hello, My father who is 80 was diagnosed with Alzheimers. My mother is 82 and is having to learn how to do everything he used to do and adjust to a new way of living. I can see that she has no idea how to find support and resources so I am stepping in to try to learn and guide her along, but I don't even know where to…
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Risperidol, but my sister wants me to try CBD
I know this might be a familiar problem for many here. (I'm new here. Hi!) My mom's doctor put her on .25mg Risperidol to help with sundowning. My mom is not violent, but last night she got up and took a shower at 2am. My dad found her in there, got her dried off and in bed, and she said she was uncomfortable (she often…
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Stroke?
My mother is 78 years old and is in the last stage of Alzheimer's. She's been in a home for about 6 weeks and the Director sent me a picture of mom the other day. I noticed that her left eye is droopy and the eye is looking in a different direction from the other eye. We were told that she has started chewing on her…
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Mistaken Identity
My dad has a sheet of paper with the names of three of his kids and their phone numbers. He has a lot of difficultly navigating the contact list in his phone hence the paper. Even though my phone number is on the list with my name, Melissa, he will call me and he thinks he is talking to my mom (who passed away just a year…
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Depression and Anger
We are entering a new stage in my mother's dementia. She has been suffering a great deal with depression and episodes of anger. The articles and books I'm reading talk about triggers and things that could cause the episodes. Recently her hysterical episodes have happened when she is alone so we are not sure what could be…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 5/25/21
Lord, Give Me Patience * Galatians 5:22-23 NKJV “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.” * James 1:19-20 NKJV “So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for…
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Bike riding alone- when do you stop?
My dad has Alzheimer’s. He is in the latter middle stage. He is coherent and fine at times. Then, other times, he is out of sorts and has difficulty communicating. In recent years, he has started riding his bike a lot more. Sometimes, he does fine. He takes the same path and makes it home ok. However, twice in the last…
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Denial about diagnosis
My mother has recently been officially diagnosed with dementia. All she knows she is having some memory problems, but testing reveals that she’s functioning at a very low level, and I concur. She denies there is a problem, as does her husband. How do I talk aboutThis with her in a way that will open her mind to getting…
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Should we tell his Sibs about MIL's spending habits?
DH has recently regained access to MIL's bank account - she keeps forgetting the password and locking herself out and needs help getting it reset so he helps her...thus we have access until she locks herself out of it again. Anyway, we have been looking at her spending over the last few months and she's been on a wild…
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First Holidays
Hi! I'm new to this forum, but have already gotten so much information from reading through many of the threads. My dad has recently been moved to assisted living after a pretty traumatic month of going through an ER and geriatric-psych facility. My 2 siblings, my mom, and I are all pretty burnt out and still working…
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Rapid decline(6)
For the last 2 years I’ve suspected my now 80 year old dad was started to get dementia. It seemed ok- and my two sisters and mom did not want to do anything about it. The last month has seen an incredible decline in his memory and he has started having rages and unbelievable paranoia. I live about 45 minutes away and do…
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Transitioning from 5 to 6
I believe my mom is beginning to move from stage 5 to 6. I’m curious what this process has looked like for others on here. Did you experience a sudden decline in ADL abilities or was it a more gradual process? Anything you noticed at the time would be interesting to me. I guess I’m trying to prepare myself.
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Routine cognitive screening can help detect early signs of dementia
Both of us lost our dads to Alzheimer’s disease, and both of our families carried extra burdens from dementia because the diagnoses were delayed. Diane’s family wondered if her dad’s personality changes were due to early retirement and feeling a loss of purpose. Nora’s family was puzzled by her dad’s trouble finding words…
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what's the right thing to say?
Now my wife has the idea that she'd like to apply for a volunteer or paid job, either shelving books at the library or peeling vegetables at a restaurant. These would be impossible, and put her "employer" in a very embarrasing position. She wants to approach the head librarian next time she's there. What's the best way to…
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DPOA and enabling stepmother
Hello, I'm very new here. My dad was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer's or dementia. The doctors said he needs an MRI to verify which. I have a strange situation as my stepmother is his primary caregiver. She hadn't had adequate doctors in to treat him. So I arranged a geriatric doctor with a program that does housecalls.…
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webnar this week
Dementia Alliance International https://mail.aol.com/webmail-std/en-us/basic#
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Small win - DH voluntarily switched to Depends!!!
I am happy to report that once again, good advice from this forum worked. It is always 1 step forward, 2 steps back with AD, but I'll take it! We were starting to see some early warning signs of incontinence, with drips and leaks plus dried pee odor. I had seen recommendations to just have Depends (or other brand) on hand…
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Mom complains no one in her MC will help her but she will not press her pendent button
Is it common for people with dementia to complain that no one will help them yet you learn that they not actually asked for help? I frequently get calls from my mom complaining no one will help her. Mom is in MC with Parkinson's. She is stuck in a wheel chair, has very limited mobility and what I consider to be pretty…
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How to deal with mom moving 2 hours away
Some of you have followed my posts about Park Merced (PM) which is by me and Eskaton which is two hours away by my brother whom I've had a falling out with over my mom in Sept. I thought I had things figured out and have been in the process of trying to get my mom in PM; however, there are issues. They have one…
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Lesson Learned
Was taking DH out for a ride yesterday. As usual, took some time to get him into vehicle. Before going through the process of securing him with seat belt, etc., I placed my keys, purse, cell phone on the driver's seat not realizing I closed the door of the vehicle. I went to the passenger side to check on DH to ensure he…
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Chuckle for the day(2)
I spoke with MIL's 90-year old sister Alma yesterday. She said that MIL has been complaining to her that we (DH and I) never tell her anything so she's always surprised when we go somewhere. We literally tell her multiple times the day before and the day of...but, of course, MIL simply can't remember. I just had to laugh.…
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Please let me know?
Please let me know if I am adding to much information to this site. I do a lot of reading and these are things I feel are import to share here. That is only bout a 5th of what I read. If it to much please let me know. Thanks
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Just wondering
Hi all just wonder if anybody could give me advise. My mom is 92 was diagnosed with early stage Alzheimer's in early 2018....she chose to go to assisted living she didn't want anybody taking care of her in her home. Her memory was ok..we had stopped her from driving before the diagnosis. Anyway she stayed in assisted…