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Very fast progression
Not sure what to do. My dad was diagnosed with Alzheimers earlier this year. Background - As I think back I can see things that were probably hints he was dealing with something last, but when we visited things were in order around the house and he seemed fine, just forgetful at times. The only real confusion I saw was him…
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Portable shower that doesn't cost and arm and a leg?
Hello ALZ connected, My LO lives at home with me. With God's Grace she is free of medication. She is going to turn 89 this year and it's been a rough road but my LO is no longer combative and I think I'm getting the hang of the no-eating situation. I'm making foods she likes. Our problem is now the showering... My LO does…
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Bad day(5)
Today has been one of those days...when you say I give up...but know I can't. My mom is treating me and talking to me like I am a little girl. Everything I have done today she has laughed at me or made fun of me. I think this disease has her brain stuck in the time period when we didn't get along. I always felt like…
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OT Threads thread
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Violent behavior or scared?
I was traumatized last night. I got a call at 2AM and they told me my dad was violent. He has been there 3 months in MC. I said I would come in 15 minutes and the nurse said that wasn't soon enough. When I arrived the police were in the lobby and the head nurse was telling them he was violent. What came out of my mouth was…
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M1, are you there?
M1, hoping to continue to hear from you. The last was that your partner fell and hit her head, and I, as well as many others, I'm sure, are concerned and would like to know how the two of you are doing. Thinking of you both.
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apologies, just need to vent
Hi All, Just feeling sad and tired today. Constantly doing for both parents, stayed over last nite because nighttime caregiver couldn't come. Changing mom's Depends, feeding her, etc. Back and forth all day today because we don't have daytime help on weekends (we have 4 hours on the weekdays but I am still there every…
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Stages and duration reference material
Abc123 asked me to start a thread specifically for this link. So here it is https://www.dementiacarecentral.com/aboutdementia/facts/stages/
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Medical Aid in Dying Dovumentary
"When My Time Comes" is a 60 minute PBS documentary that airs on my affiliate tonight (check your PBS station(s) for air dates/times). "Retired NPR radio host Diane Rehm visits with medical experts, religious leaders, and others to learn about Medical Aid in Dying and options for the terminally I'll and their families."
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How Do I Distract An Obsessive Dad
My dad has severe dementia & obsesses about different things. We can’t go far from the house cuz part of his obsessing is the bathroom. What can I do as a distraction?
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FIL having a few bad days
Though he remains gentle and cooperative, my FIL with dementia is having a rough few days. He is confused about where this house is. We've had the same conversation for three days. He asks where this is. I tell him as briefly and directly as possible. He seeks verification. Then again. He asks where the nearby village is…
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New Behavior(1)
My father was dx with lewy body dementia in April 2020. Over the past few weeks, he has started yelling at everyone and has to have his way immediately or he gets agitated. He expects us to drop whatever we are doing and do whatever he wants immediately. We are not sure how to handle this behavior. Does anyone have any…
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grief
There was an opinion piece in USAToday called "Driving My Spouse to the Afterlife" today. It really struck me. I had been grappling with saying "goodbye" to my mother over the past couple of months, even though she continues to be fairly healthy. But, she is no longer who she was. And I have felt profound grief in the loss…
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Sad and frustrated!
Hi all, my mom just had an appointment with a geriatric psychiatrist. She has yet to be diagnosed with dementia. We were hopeful this would be the appointment that would give us some answers. Mom wouldn’t let us go to the appt, so we wrote a detailed letter of what has transpired over the last year. The nurse met with mom…
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APAM and turn
Just bought an alternating pressure air mattresses as suggested by our members here. My question is if I still need to turn LO? like at least once at night?
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How to choose?
I’ve started touring facilities for my mom. My question is how do you decide which one will be ok? I have no real idea of what stage my mom is in. I take care of her 24/7. Here in MT, they say she can either go to AL or MC. I’m so torn on which to choose. She doesn’t communicate well so that’s a huge concern of mine.…
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Namenda question and Good Days/Bad Days
My Mom had a neurological appointment this week and during that visit based on her progression the doc advised she was well into stage 6. I had been thinking she was stage 5 or early stage 6. She still walks fine, speaks, can follow conversations, feeds herself mostly appropriately and has times where she is oriented fully…
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difficult evenings and not wanting to get out of bed
Hello! New to this site and hoping to learn from others. My mom has alzheimer's and lives in a nursing facility. Evenings are difficult due to sundowning and she will have increased anxiety, confusion, and yelling. Typically starts around 4ish and when staff get her up for supper. Mom would prefer to sleep and be left…
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Depakote added with Seroquel
Has anyone had a loved one that takes both Depakote and Seroquel? If so, I am wondering what reaction you see in the person you care for that takes both medications, and was it also for agitation and aggression? DH is already on Seroquel but the Neurologist suggested adding Depakote along with Seroquel for DH anxiety and…
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Looking For Volunteers
Is there a website I can go to where I can look for a volunteer in my area to help relieve us during the day for a couple of hours or so? My dad is REALLY getting stressed out and tired. He tries to escape every minute he can. I am about to graduate college in 4.5 weeks and my chemistry class has me super busy so lately I…
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LO Still Trying to Help
My dad has always been very handy and always fixed things around the house himself. He just can't do it anymore. For example, the cable stopped working so he tried to fix it and ended up yanking the phone cord out of the jack. So then the phone was broke but neither he or my mom knew why. A version of this scenario has…
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Family members who refuse to be involved
I’m disabled and caring for my dad with some help from my mom who is also disabled. We’re struggling hard to keep up with everything. My sibling has totally refused to be involved even though they have more resources than we do. Is this a common thing for a family member to just refuse to help? Do they ever come around? Am…
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Im new to this....
Hello.... I have had to put my mom in a nursing home as of the middle of last month. This is after a time being spent in Laureate trying to figure out why she was catatonic and deeply depressed. She had been hearing voices, at times she believed it was even me or "the Father" telling her things. Come to find out this…
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Memory Care visits causing distress for mom..?
Hi everyone, I am hoping that those of you who have or had LO's in Memory Care can offer some insight and/or advice about visits with your LO that seem to be doing more harm than good? My mom was moved to a beautiful Memory Care facility in February due to numerous falls and worsening dementia. She seems to be adjusting…
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Need communication ideas
Good morning, I am new to this group and am excited to be here. My mother is in mid stages of VD. She is obsessing about going to her old home to clean it out to sell it. I have already done this myself and have communicated it previously to her but she insists on going there. Everyone I tt says to redirect, make up…
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Dad caring for Mom with Alzheimer’s won’t let us help
I just found out yesterday that my mom received a Alzheimer’s diagnosis several years ago. Her memory has been getting steadily worse, but . . . she’s 91, so it didn’t seem so odd. It’s a lot to absorb, but the problem I’m struggling with isn’t my mom. It’s my dad, her caregiver. He is 88 and likely dealing with mental…
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Covid and facility activities?
For those of you experienced with AL and MC facilities, were group activities or the like put on hold in 2020 due to covid? Were your LOs alone some of the time that was usually used for activities or socialization? I’m just curious, thanks for any response.
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anxiety attack/panic attacks
My mom has Alz and VD. Has been relatively stable the last 6 months. Then she got the second Moderna vaccine shot and things just seem to have gone haywire. coincidence, possible. We do see the geri psych on Friday, so only a few more days. And I have been in touch with her already as well. But the day after the shot,…
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How to get LO to keep on Depends?
Any and all suggestions are welcomed. She is taking them off more and more. Soiling/wetting the bed and furniture. Dad is having a hard time keeping up with this problem.
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New - need to hear from smartr people than me
As a (the) caregiver - right now my mind is so overwhelmed I don't even understand how I can feel this way, so lost -- so helpless - so completely beaten (it seems). Thanks for listening - I can't 'comprehend' feeling so ignorant, so inadequate. I 'Know' many of you know of what I speak. I've always been a person of action…