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Researching FACILITIES: Care Managers? Who to trust? What questions to ask? Where to begin?
My husband is only 56 and probably in stage 4. I understand that it's important that I research options for memory care now (or soon), because things can decline abruptly with early-onset AD. I got a list of "care managers" from the Alzheimer's Association hotline folks but they were careful to tell me that they "don't…
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Dental care
DH has always been meticulous about self care and would never consider missing a shower. Same thing about dental care. I find that ever so gradually this is changing. Once in awhile he wants to skip a shower. It happens rarely so I haven’t yet made a big deal of it. I’m more concerned about dental care as he does have some…
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Repeated falls
My DH has now been in AL for two years, with Parkinson’s disease that has caused severe physical disability and advancing dementia. He is in a wheelchair, and needs assists with all his ADL’s. He is supposed to call for help with all transfers but he does not recognize that he is disabled, which I have learned here…
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My great grandmother passed away
My great grandmother passed away due to dementia. Since she was very old, we didn't take her symptoms seriously, which I believe prevented us from detecting dementia early. Looking back, early diagnosis of dementia seems to be the most important thing. She had symptoms of delirium, but we didn't think much of it. It wasn't…
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Hospice denial / appeal
Hi there. My name is Angela and we are caring for my father in law who is in the late stages of Alzheimer’s. He is on a level 7e on the FAST scale. He is 100% bed ridden, doesn’t talk, sleeps 15-19 hours a day, in a diaper 24/7, cannot feed himself and starting to having some troubles swallowing. He has been on hospice…
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DW scared me today
I was shocked to my core today. DW is late stage 6 or early 7 - 6 1/2 years since EO diagnosis. This morning when I got her out of bed, her facial expression said it all - she was lost and terrified. DW has been in a relative calm stage of over the last year, so this was a sudden change. And I couldn't reach her. After…
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Disqualified from hospice
My dad was just put on hospice. I know some of you had LO that were on hospice but was eventually discharged. What would disqualify a person from hospice?
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Suggestions for software for keeping track of everything
I think I should start keeping stuff organized and am wondering if anyone is using any particular software that they find useful. So far, everything I have has just been written down in a book and the stuff that's printed off is in a folder. I would love to just get everything into a program that will make it easy for me…
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Approaches and ways of handling Memory Care upsets with Dad
Hi Community, I value your experiences and your input. My learning curve on these issues is pretty steep here. A few updates and then some new questions for you. Dad's transition to a 2nd memory care (b/c it is in the same state where I live) continues to be challenging. I now have the Alexa, so at least that has paused…
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How to say "No" to adopt a new dog
Hi everyone: I'm really struggling with this one. My MIL's beloved dog passed away two weeks ago. He had been getting sick over the past weeks and she never identified that there was something wrong with him. Example: he had a huge tumor on his toe that burst open and bled everywhere. She only cleaned the blood on the…
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Support group?
I am 22 and a caregiver of my grandma with dementia and looking for a support group chat for people who are also a caregiver. I was thinking of making a discord server or instagram group chat. Please comment if interested. I would like to share info I know and get advice from others. 🙏
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Question about using Depends
DH as has had only a couple of accidents related to incontinence. But it really upset him. No knowing what the recurrence would be I suggested Depends or the underwear inserts. He said no way. I just ordered them and snuck them in. When he had another accident, I showed them to him. Now he loves them and wants to wear them…
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Memory
My DH has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Is it normal (usual may be a better term) for him to remember some things better than I do yet not remember other things?
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Need suggestions!
Hello out there. We are moving my LO into memory care in the next couple of weeks, but not sure how to go about telling her without a complete meltdown. Looking for suggestions/ideas/success stories. I intend to make up a little white lie in order to have it make sense to her as to why she would have to move out of her…
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Mom’s Dementia
Hello, I am new to this site, but felt it’s time I should join to get help and insight. April 2020, my mom got Covid Pneumonia. Prior to this, she was getting forgetful and accusatory. Mentioned this to her doctors, but they said it was age. After a week stay, brought her home from the hospital. She kept saying her…
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When Will I Learn?
My brother is awful! He agreed with the AL facility to put my LO into MC before giving her ample time to emotionally and cognitively transition from home to institutionalize care. (3.5 WEEKS) JUST TOOO QUICKLY Assistance depends upon the amount of staff a facility has. More staff equates to more assistance. Less staff,…
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Anosognosia - Mom refuses help
I am the only living child and live on the other side of the country. Mom (89) has lived on her own for about 5 years since my dad passed away. During that time i have been paying her bills and doing as much as i can from across the country. I first noticed my mom starting to experience memory lapses about 20 months ago.…
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Sometimes you have to laugh
So, just when life gets you down, sometimes you have to laugh. Last night my DH started to panic. "We have to get out of here! I know what I'm talking about. We don't have security clearance. You need to go cook dinner across the street." None of this made any sense, of course, but the best line was, "Where can I find…
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Genome testing
Moms doctor has suggested genome testing to see what medication she will respond best to for her anger and anxiety. It’s just a mouth swab and she said it would be covered by insurance, so we are going to give it a try. Have any of you had this done for your LO? Was it helpful?
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Newbie feeling alone
Hi everyone, I'm Catherine. I live in California. My Mom is 89, has MCD and currently lives in South Carolina. We are at the tail end of a 6 month process of me taking over everything and moving her to a CCC close to me in CA. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel for this part of the process, and will be so…
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excessive sleeping
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Appointments
I am my mom’s caregiver. I am not looking for medical advice, just looking for different views. My mom is almost 85, later stage Alzheimer’s. My question is, when do you start limiting all of the extra doctor appointments? Example: she has an annual appointment with her vascular doctor. They test the pressure in her legs.…
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Dilemma about Memory Care
I have two questions: First, almost universally the memory care facilities I have visited say you should place your person sooner rather than later. I wonder what the evidence is for this, or whether it's easier for them to have less impaired people. What I see, almost everywhere, is people who are mostly pretty far along…
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Primary Geriatrics PCP prescribed Lexipro
Hi all, My dad’s primary care Dr prescribed Lexipro for his looping thoughts and anxiety. anyone have an experience with this? How were the results did it help at all? Dr said she has had good results with her other dementia patients with it for anxiety.
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Locked doors
We are approaching the point of keeping doors locked. During the day the front door is blocked by a sun screen. The side door is open. I am able to keep an eye on things. Not sure how to phrase this….i am wondering how peoples LO react when they find the doors locked. Especially t first. Thank you….
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TIME TO HIDE THINGS
DH thinks he is being helpful, but he's not. Today he put my computer somewhere??? and my headphones too. I was out for a couple of hours and when I came home they were missing. He managed to walk out with my computer, but my headphones are still missing. He thought I would want to put my computer away somewhere else and…
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Transitioning to MC
Would any of you mind sharing your experiences broaching the subject of moving your LO into memory care? I will be having this discussion soon and want to hear the good, bad, and ugly!
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Forget Me Not
While I have found this site very helpful I have also searched You Tube and found several other very informative sites for caregivers like myself and loved ones that others may find helpful. I found Answers About Alzheimers on You Tube and a very informative and helpful book Forget Me Not by Debra Kostiw. Using the…
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Went looking for love
Well I did something I'm not very proud of, but I'm getting to the end of my rope. I have been so lonely and in need of companionship. DW is late stage and we are in year 7 of this journey. I'm still relatively young at 65. I decided to go onto one of those dating websites to see if I could find someone willing to spend…
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Obsessive plant watering
my DW is watering our plants 4 or 5 times a day. They are desert plants. Not only don’t they need it but it’s affecting them adversely. Any ideas how to redirect the behavior without hurting her feelings?