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Help maneuvering unwilling dementia patient
My grandmother was diagnosed with dementia two months ago following a hip surgery, the family has been trying for years to get the diagnosis. Since that diagnosis she's undergone two surgeries', three weeks out of a full ankle replacement she cannot be weight bearing, but she also doesn't feel intense pain anymore. Shes…
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feeling so alone
Hi, my name is Kathy and I'm 63 years old. My husband Billy, who is 65, was diagnosed with early age onset AD in January 2022. His symptoms started roughly a year prior (2 years after retirement) but we initially thought that his forgetfulness, misplacement of personal belongings, repeatedly asking the same questions and…
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VA Benefits(2)
I went to my first support group last month and all the women were my age! It was like walking into a book club of friends. I'm going every month. These women are a wealth of knowledge and compassion. I asked many questions of the group and someone mentioned the Veterans Admin and its benefits for Alz veterans. It never…
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Hidden blessings
I’m trying to find hidden caregiver blessings. I am in the process of moving my mom to live in a mixed community specializing in aa/memory care closer to me and miraculously it is going ok (move is next week). Yes the past year has been brutal. I know there will be tough times ahead. But I am finding these little blessings…
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Just another heartbreak and lie
I live in Florida and take care of my Alz. mom. I have for 5 years. I decided to place her in a "Memory Care" facility. I had to make a doctor's appointment for a TB test and to fill out the 1823 form. I have been driving back and forth for paperwork, down payment (it is 45 minutes away) for about 3 weeks. I panicked last…
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Caregiver's Anxiety
It has been almost one year since diagnosis and what a year it has been. I felt good about how things were going until about 3 months ago. Since then I feel like my anxiety is over the top. I am basically the sole caregiver for my LO. One sibling is not involved (so heartbreaking and disappointing) and one lives out of…
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Home care for incontinent spouse with bed sores.
My DH developed nearly complete urinary incontinence this summer. Before then, he'd have accidents, but they were infrequent. He has mobility issues, so I bought him urinals to have beside his chair. And I check with him every couple of hours to see if he needs to go. I don't think that he can tell if he needs to urinate,…
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Tough month
It's been a tough month, although Peggy has remained relatively calm and cheerful in spite of everything. She's now at later stage 6 and it's still the slow progression, no falling off cliffs. Even so, some of the new behaviors are distressing, even if not unexpected. Peggy is starting to have delusions. She saw a man…
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Inexpensive camera to watch LO while I'm at work?
My LO with EO is home alone for 2 days per week. Can anyone recommend an inexpensive camera system that I can set up in the living room and kitchen to monitor her? So far she is very functional and doesn't use more than the toaster but I'd like to be able to check on her once and a while when I'm at work.
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 11/2/22
GOD REJOICES GOD’S THOUGHT: Zephaniah 3:17 “The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.” VICTORY THOUGHT: I give God great pleasure and bring Him joy. POWER PRAYER: Lord, forgive me when I…
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Caregivers Know Best?
Took my husband to the clinic today for our scheduled Covid and flu vaccines. Husband has Alzheimer's so moving very slowly. Before I could orient myself to the room and the different stations, anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medications have left me with brain fog, one of the nurses started telling me to come over to…
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Well that went well - NOT
I had plans to go away for 2 days and my sister refused to cover for me. Who else did she think could do it? Both my brothers work full time, 1 is an OTR trucker driver. I blew up at her and told her to not bother coming back here anymore since she can't commit to helping. One of my brothers is the financial POA, my sister…
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Wanting control, but unsafe situations
My Mom has 24/7 care in the home by a caregiver thru a home health establishment. My Mom is forgetful, walks with a walker, fragile and physically not stable, How to handle Caregiver says to stay on the couch until caregiver comes back from going to the bathroom. Here she finds our Mom has gotten up and gone to the kitchen…
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A good read...
This past summer my cousin, who is taking care of her 102 yr old Mom, recommended a book to me that I would like to recommend to all of you. It's called 'Winter Stars' by Dave Iverson. Under the title it says..."An elderly mother, an aging son, and life's final journey." I'm half way into the book at this time and can say…
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I've won, but at what cost (semi joke)
So I was right on the donepezil was causing mom chronic diarrhea. Pretty much as soon as she stopped taking it, her bowel movement became regular. But then this past Friday was the last time we saw any bowel movement. Monday I mixed some prune juice with her regular juice and tried to give her more fibrous foods and let…
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MC and refusing cancer pill
So we placed mom into MC in the beginning of May. It took a couple of weeks, but she did settle for the most part. Then in mid June something happened to make her think someone was waiting outside for her and it got her very agitated that she couldn't go outside to meet them. She almost hit a staff member during the…
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Talking to (and touching) strangers
My mom is in the early stages of ALZ and the most concerning thing for us is that she approaches strangers (usually men) and engages them in conversation often sharing personal information. She will their touch arms or shoulders as she talks to them. I find it very uncomfortable as a companion, but I can't get her to stop…
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I’m too lazy to get therapy but probably need it
Hello kind people-I just joined and wondered if anyone else is struggling with caring for a loved one who was not a good parent? My parents are Korean immigrants who made many poor decisions. Despite that, my brother and I turned out fine. I’ve always covered up for their shortcomings so I have tremendous guilt even…
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Frustration(3)
Sometimes it’s so hard to keep from getting loud with my mom. Hard to keep from telling her “you just asked me this, you told me this a lot, “. Sometimes I’m real patient , sometimes I lose my patience. I have 2 brothers and I’m the one who visits her. Sometimes I just want to yell at her. Her hygiene is getting worse.…
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Abe’s Garden
Wow!!! Just toured Abe’s Garden. So amazing! Abe’s daughter, Judy, showed me around. Everything about this place and the people was impressive and like nowhere else I’d seen. Unfortunately, out of my price range. Maybe O can win the lottery tonight.
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Force glaucoma surgery or mom goes blind?
Hi, I am new to the forums. I have medical power of attorney over my mother instead of my dad because he is too self centered and didn't do a good job. My mom has lost vision in her right eye that was only discovered when I took her to the ER for Shingles. She & my dad kept insisting she fell down and that is why her head…
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DW diagnosed a while ago
Hi, I'm new here. My wife was diagnosed with ES AD last year. But we first noticed her big memory issues back in 2017. Due to another special need person in the family who my wife was caring for we did not think that her own condition was so bad, we all thought her problems stem from her being tired from caring for her…
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Help with Aide asking if my mom wants a bath
We have a hospice aide that comes in to bathe my mom 3 x a week. Every time she asks my mom if she wants a bath. Often my mom answers, No, so she won't bathe her without my mom saying yes. My mom is stage 7 dementia and has no capacity to understand what is being said to her. I am her guardian. My mother can not consent to…
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MRI results(2)
Hi everyone, We are in the early stages of getting my mom care. She had mild memory issues maybe 3 or 4 years ago but the past year after losing her husband if 60 plus years took a huge slide. Now, we finally got MRI results but only preliminary reading (the neurologist she saw who ordered the MRI is away). Basically it…
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Father having difficult time with positive communication with my mother
Hello everyone. I am new to this group and excited to get to know others in this group. My father is struggling with knowing how to communicate with my mother who has gotten more and more irritable with her diagnosis in the past year of Alzheimers. Her sundowners is getting worse and my father just is not the most patient…
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Neuropathy in Hands
Hi, My dad has been having bad pain in his hands. It was mostly happening in the early hours of the morning and his caregiver would massage his hands and make them feel better. She is away and the substitute doesn't know what to do to make him feel better. We gave him some Tylenol,but is there medicine for this? I looked…
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Tooth Retraction
My mom (95) has a molar tooth that has a large cavity in it causing her pain and the dentist said it will need to be removed, as it is too large to be repaired. We are concerned about her being placed under anesthesia as I heard it will possibly cause a worsening of dementia. She is in a mid-late stage as it is and do not…
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Dental extraction
Hello My mother with Alzheimer’s needs to have a tooth extraction. The last time she had dental work was pre COVID-19 over a year ago. At the time, although she did not like it she put up with it and allowed the procedure to happen. This time however, she is more advanced with her disease and has less understanding of what…
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resources for memory care facilities ln and around st. louis
My sister and I are in the process of looking into a long term MC facility for LO. Looking for any suggestions good or bad. Trying to make the best move
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How do we juggle our lives with taking care of our parents?
Both my father and stepmom have Alzheimer’s and dementia. Stepmom also has aphasia. My stepsisters and I are trying to figure she care of them, have a POA and are taking over the management of their lives. They have a caregiver 5 days a week but still call us 10 times a day to help with emergencies that are not…