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Completely failed my mother
Less than 60 days after my mother was moved into AL (diagnosed with Alzheimer's in early 2022), she is gone. Living 10+ hours away from my parents, I tried to put aside my reservations about dad moving her to AL since he (age 81) was doing all the caregiving and I was not there on a regular basis to see exactly how she had…
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Lack of independence
How do you deal with you LO lack of independence? My mom relies on us for everything and the only thing she will do on her own in watch tv (she lives with us). She's open to do some things but everything must be initiated by me or my husband. While I know that apathy is part of dementia, I still get so frustrated by this…
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IADLs
Instrumental Activities of Daily Living are intermediate level activities that we might learn in our adolescence to enable our independence. The IADLs are: telephoning/texting/emailing preparing meals marketing driving or using a bus or taxi doing laundry cleaning, doing housework paying bills and managing finances taking…
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New poster but not new to PWD
Hi, my Mom has dementia, probably late stage 5 or 6. I recently had to move her to Memory Care from AL as she was trying to get out the doors and forgetting how to get to her room or meals. She has lived there full time for 4 years. Been in MC for under 2 weeks. I've tried to be consistent on visiting but it gets harder…
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Love this geri chair but…
How in the world do you slide someone back up who has slid down? It’s a 3 position chair. I have no problem when it’s 2 people, only when I’m alone. I am too short to reach over the back like I would a wheelchair. In the past, I would use a seatbelt but I worry about it cutting into his legs now because he pushes hard…
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mommyandme (m&m) How did the move go?
MommyandMe, did I miss your update? How did the move go with your mom to the living room area? Do you feel like it made things better not moving mom as much? Does everyone seem to be adjusting?
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Semi-Challenging Situation - Advice?
My father had hip pinning surgery first week of May. He did not get back to his baseline of being able to use a walker let alone stand up. In fact, he still does not want you to move his leg and he can’t/won’t put pressure on that leg (well very, very little). Had a bunch of x-rays done two weeks ago and still waiting on…
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Suggestions for fiblets/distractions about diapers when confined to bed?
Because this was a huge sticking point with grandma last week, and it will come up again and again... Grandma cannot walk any more due to a stroke a few months ago, so our toileting has become diapering. I am so grateful for the example I've learned here to call them "underwear/panties" to try to spare the LO's dignity.…
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Paying For Air Medical Transport
I found an Air Medical Transport service to move my LO Long distance closer to us. When I called them, they said we have to pay $26,000 check immediately before they will even book. $28,000 by credit card... I was taught not to pay off a non-local business you are not familiar with before service is rendered, but the…
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TL; DR: New here; The mother I knew and loved is already gone.
Hello all, New here. Title says it all. My mother got the diagnosis in 2019, although in retrospect, probably had symptoms in 2017 or so. She lives in an assisted living facility ten minutes from my house and we have 24-hr home health aides with her. I have a brother about 3-4 hours' drive time from me, who is supportive…
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Project Fixation?
I've been reading the forums for a while but haven't posted yet. I'm an in-home and now stay-at-home caregiver for my LO (who is my grandparent, but I'm 40 years old and fully adult). Currently, LO wavers back and forth between several middle stages; there are days when LO assumes I'm my mom (who passed away when I was…
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We've entered stage 7
My mom is in stage 7 now. She isn't talking at all anymore and hasn't been out of bed in about 2 weeks. They did transfer her to a chair this morning and wheel her down to the dining room but she didn't eat anything and seems like it's hard to hold her head up. I don't think she knows me anymore but she isn't talking so…
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Porn & Alzheimer’s
My 87-year-old dad has Alzheimer’s (lives at home with my 88-year-old mom.) I checked his browser history because my mom is as wondering about some unexplained Patreon charges on his credit card. I was shocked and repulsed to find a ton of porn sites! This is NOT the father who raised me and has been a faithful loving…
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If SECONDARY caretakers are at the breaking point...
If SECONDARY caretakers are at the breaking point... ...then what does that say about the whole situation?! Our LO (my grandmother) is 81 years old and in the late stages, probably 6e from what I understand it; she can still speak in sentences but is bedridden and incontinent. She used to live with her husband and a son…
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old letters are new again
I am caring for my brother after finding out that he has med stage alzheimers and prostate cancer stage 4. When we moved him to live with us we had to clean out his apartment. He has been a hoarder for many years much to our surprise. We tried to bring as much as we could and amoung some of his stuff was old letters that…
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My father has finally been placed in a nursing home.
My mother has finally found a place for my father. She has been caring for him for the last several years. Things have gotten worse with the dementia and she no longer feels she can care for him safely. Our family agrees this is the best thing. She is in her 70s and at her wits end. I know she needs a break. Unfortunately…
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New here, no diagnosis
Hello, all, My 79 year old mom has been showing signs of dementia for several years, but in the last year, things have gotten much worse. She lives on her own and refuses to get a diagnosis. She had a neurology referral in January, made the appointment under heavy encouragement from me, but then cancelled it the day…
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New to Forums and Alzheimers
My husband had first time Epileptic Seizures in 2018. 4 years ago to the month At that time I was told (,but he was not) that it was the beginning of Alzhiemers, as that is what most men in their 70's with first time seizure end up with.. .His health records show he has some mild cognative imparement but I notive it is…
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Fiblets(1)
I saw this article about using fiblets and thought I’d share. It’s one woman’s experience. https://protomag.com/uncategorized/yes-mother/?twclid=2-2adybxbjqduprpzh3hdydc9m9
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Hi, new to this group - and disease
My mother has recently been diagnosed with Dementia/Alzheimer’s. I have no experience with this but every day is bringing on new challenges. She has caregivers in her home but doesn’t think she needs them. She gave up the car keys voluntarily a few months ago after several instances getting lost in nearby, familiar places…
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Well I did it…
…against my better judgment. The very rare occasion arrived that all moms six grandchildren were here. My husband and I decided to have a BBQ gathering with the fam. I thought that getting mom out in her wheelchair would be a good thing. I curled her hair, put lipstick on her and off we went. After all, it’s only just…
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recognition lost and found
Hi everyone, My mom is late stage Alzheimer's and I'm her only daughter. We have a good relationship and she has, for the majority of her journey (started in 2012, dx'ed in 2014) felt safe with me and as though I am "her person." Up until recently (last ~2 months) she has quite consistently understood who I am. Even when…
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After spouse dies
I’m pretty sure my fathers body is shutting down. My mother is in memory care. She is still physically well, verbal and does well with outings, but obviously still very much as Alzheimer’s (mid to late maybe?). I literally have no idea what to do after my dad passes. Does she attend the funeral? Do we tell her at all? What…
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My LO
My LO is my 95 year old cousin with Alzheimer's Disease. She lives in herhome with 24/7 caregivers. I telephone her every week to keep in contact. I'm sure she doesn't quite know who I am. The other day, our conversation went like this: Her: my sister was supposed to visit me but she isn't here yet. (her sister died over…
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in home care and car use question
Does anyone have an in-home care person that uses your car for errands or to take their LO out and about? If so, is there a special insurance you get for this? I've had caregivers use their own car but haven't been in a situation where the caregiver may use our car.
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Scammers in the family
I am completely blown away! I have spent almost all year getting my EO LO finances in order (yes I have POA) only to find scammers in the family!!! They want to "borrow" money from my EO LO for their own personal use....OMG. I thought the scammers on the web were awful. Her own family is trying to take her money! I am…
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New to all of this.
Not sure where to begin. Arrived 2 weeks ago to give assistance at home. Father (89) has dementia; younger brother (61) suffers mental illness past year or so, he was previous caregiver to my father, brother is admitted to hospital again after a stay 25 June-16 Aug. House is in terrible condition, filthy and in disrepair.…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 8/24/22
THANK YOU, MY FRIENDS. Thank you for all your comments on the last Bible Verse. I treasure them always. Peace, Veronica Kelly Badowski, (Ronnie) FORGIVE OTHERS GOD THOUGHT: Luke 6:37 “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” VICTORY TRUTH:…
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Caregiver Concern: What If Something Happens To Me?
Excellent planning information along with some useful links from Family Caregiver Alliance for Caregivers regarding, "What if something happens to me?" Just keep scrolling down the pages for some really good planning information: https://www.caregiver.org/resource/what-if-something-happens-to-me/ J.
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Socialization with a DH with Alzheimer's
Hi. This is the first time I've reached out to this group. I feel like my husband and I need more socialization with others. I am hesitant to meet new people as my DH has Alzheimer's. His socialization skills are still good, most of the time. Out of fairness to others, I think it helps if they have a heads up about what is…