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New Here(14)
Hello. I'm new to this space. The message board, and the world of living with this ugly disease. My 58 year old husband started acting "out of character" a couple years ago, and progressed to the point of me being ready for a new life. My best friend convinced me that perhaps he needed some medical help. Several months of…
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Post Surgical Delirium?
Hi Friends - I'm reaching out for some guidance and direction. My DH, diagnosed with mild dementia about 8 yrs ago, had extensive spinal surgery on 5/17, was under anesthesia for 5 hours and was given hydrocodone, muscle relaxants and early on, percoset and dilaudid (the latter 2 briefly) for pain. He experienced…
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I made the decision & I am taking a leap of faith
I have listened to trusted individuals and professionals. I have considered the options. I have visited nursing facilities. I have consulted with our PCP. I have prayed about this situation. Contrary to the wise, objective, and logic based advice I have received from the majority of responders here, I am bringing my DH…
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DH is in denial
He says nothing wrong with me. He says he has no AD.
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GPS Tracking(1)
Can anyone advise as to what type of GPS tracking they are or have used on their DH. He has left the house on a few occasions without me knowing. Each time he was returned home safely. I have an ID bracelet but he manages to take it off. Please any advice will be appreciated.
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Wife with dementia, travel, public restrooms
My wife is in the moderate range of dementia. She sometimes gets disoriented in unfamiliar places. We want to take about a three or four hour trip to visit her relatives. I’m sure she will need to make a pit stop somewhere along the way. I’m not comfortable with her going into restrooms by herself as she may get confused…
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DH insists on buying toys
does anyone have experience with fending off the "I wants"? Technically he can afford, but huge waste of money, and of course he doesn't think through that he'll need assistance to use these things. Latest is a kayak. How do we transport? Where will it be stored? Of course, he doesn't care, he just wants. The wants rarely…
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small memory project
We are seeing a lot of TV commercials about travel, and Paul said "We've been a lot of places. Help me remember where we've been." There was a recent comment about going to a certain wildlife place together, but I'd not been there. I started a list. We've been married 22 years, not our first marriages. I listed all I could…
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lot's of good info
I just watched this; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlPbYKSlvXIv
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I think I’m loosing it!
DH seems to be doing better, mild cognitive impairment, memory issues are getting worse, however, meds seem to be helping. He is less attentive towards me, contributes little to our conversations, and falls asleep very very early. I miss having a stimulating conversation. Otherwise, he’s doing fairly well overall. It’s me!…
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funeral trip
I grew up in a different state, and most of my relatives still live there. My brother died suddenly. Paul was back and forth as to whether he wanted to go along on the trip. On one hand he wanted to see my family, and didn't want to be separated from me. On the other, he didn't like the thought of a 12-hour car trip or…
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Difficult weekend
Seriously horrible weekend. Saturday morning at 6:20 AM, my (92 year old) father calls and says he can't walk, he wants me to take him urgent care. No problem, I will get there as soon as I can. (it's a 2 hour drive) My brother who lives less than 10 miles away, was out of town this weekend. Normally he would call him. We…
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Lady Texan, thinking about you
I know the hospital had set today for tentative discharge, am hoping that didn't happen. Hope you are okay.
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Link: How To Manage Your Anger When Caring For Someone With Dementia
I came upon the following link quite by accident and found it is an excellent writing on how to manage one's own anger when caring for a LO with dementia. Worth reading: https://www.iona.org/manage-anger-caring-dementia/ J.
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emails and internet connectivity
My DH is in early stages of early onset A . He has been put on sick leave but still thinks he can administer work. I can't keep on top of his connectivity to the internet. - I can't take his phone away or his lap top. He answering emails from 2017 for example or replies to one person what should be said to another. I am…
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Our final trip together
Today was our final trip together. I took the urn with her ashes to her niche in the cemetary, our pastor met us there for prayers, the cover was secured and I returned home. She died at home on Mother's Day, her funeral was very beautiful then the herse returned her to the mortuary for cremation. I picked up the urn last…
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Paying for Custodial Care
When I spoke to the treatment team at the Psych Hospital, they indicated that DH needs "custodial care". My understanding is this is not skilled nursing care. Are any of you aware of assistance programs that can help me pay for "custodial care" in a facility? Texas has a Star Plus+ Waiver program that assists for paying…
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Social Security Question
Some time ago, there was a discussion of the need to be approved to act as a representative for one's spouse in Social Security matters. Would someone please refresh me on that procedure or perhaps direct me to a place where I can find it? Thanks
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Question about VA benefits.
I remember reading on here about a special classification for vets who are in later stages. A friend's husband is a Vietnam Vet, maybe exposed to agent orange. Anyone have info to help her get some help from VA. PPeggy
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Does anybody have this problem with posting
WWhen I post EEvery new line WWill double the FFirst letter iit doesn't matter if it's capital or not. IIt only happens on this board. Has been happening for a long time. Usually I just delete. It doesn't happen unless it's the beginning of a new paragraph in the middle of paragraphs is fine TTHanks SShardy
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Still Surprised After 17 Years
After 17 years of helping my DH navigate EOAD, I assumed that not much could surprise me about this journey. Except for exceeding the expected longevity for early onset, he really did follow the progression timeline closely. So, I was a little taken off guard when he started having seizures a week ago. I know that this is…
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Befriending Grief
I wish I could do this with grace and dignity, befriend Grief. I have succumbed to the depression and sadness, to the ongoing effects of isolation exacerbated by the pandemic. All the losses keep coming and seem magnified by each other until it looms over me now, a constant. This constant is now so familiar it is the…
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I NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE
Despite the relatively short time period dealing with my wife's problems and illness I am now realizing I have to give myself some care, a rest or just get some form of human contact that does not required an effort. I have gone from being responsible for maintaining everything like the house, cars and landscaping to where…
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54th Wedding Anniversary
Thursday was our 54th wedding anniversary. I had the day all planned to make it a good day for both DH and for me. For lunch, I planned to order from Red Lobster and pick it up curbside. It is hard for DH to eat out; the menus are too confusing and he doesn't enjoy it. After lunch, I planned to take DH for a ride and stop…
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How do I validate accusations without agreeing
My DH is again accusing me of infidelity. How do I validate his feelings without admitting they're true? All his other delusions I can play along with, but not this one which makes him more insistent. A little background: It first began out of the blue in December and my emotions were raw each time it happened. Time has…
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2nd memory care visited
When I needed respite in april, I candidated to 2 memory care facilities. Only one had places in may. So the respite stay was scheduled. 19 days. I had been told they were the most specialized and very high quality. The price was also high 3200€/ month compared to others that are 2000 +-200€. My partner didn’t like it and…
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Phone calls?
DH is very social, and thrives when he's around people. I do everything I can to make that happen. But, we all know how this disease progresses. He's no longer able to have conversations with others that make any sense. Everyone we know is so great about it, and tries to involve him in the conversations. It's usually the…
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Getting DH to Accept Outside Helper
It is time to approach the topic of bringing in a companion for my DH who has VD. The last time I mentioned it right before the COVID shutdown, he angrily replied that he didn't need a babysitter. I need to bring it up again. How do I get him used to the idea so he will accept the helper? He is the type of guy who doesn't…
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Android phone GPS tracking app?
My significant other is a 59 year old female who is AD stage 2 (of 7). Still very functional but has significant short term memory loss. She drives some but only during the day. I’m trying to research dealing with what’s coming. She’s Android and I’m Apple. Anyone using an Android app that tracks movements and sends out…
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Traveling with spouse who has dementia
I’m new to this group and I have a question. We’ve been invited to stay with friends in FL for 2 weeks. Will the change in environment make his dementia worse? Has anyone noticed this?