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My Long Boring Story ….
Being from Canada I was lucky to find this wonderful Forum where one can express their inner most thoughts. Having said that, I feel that i will be able to relieve some of my stress by putting pen to paper to relieve my stress. I am 75 years old and my pretty and physically fit wife is 70. I had a good job and my wife ran…
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Things have progressed
I haven't posted here in quite a while, but things with my Significant other/life partner have progressed recently. At first, her only problem was short term memory loss which was easy for me to deal with. A few months ago, she started sleeping all day, often 16-18 hours a day. She also was getting no exercise and was…
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Death of sibling
Friday night my DH'S younger brother passed away. He is one of 7 and this is the first to die. I am having a hard time figuring out how to tell him and what to do about wake?/funeral? Any suggestions? I did call Alz Ass and talked to a lovely gal who gave me some suggestions. Just wanted to see if anyone has gone through…
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Frustrated with the system at KP
DH was diagnosed with MCI 3 years ago after an MRI showed evidence of an old parietal stroke. He has 2 more strokes in the last 2 years and he was finally seen at the memory clinic in May. Cognitive impairment, possible early VD was the outcome. Reassess him in 6 mo. Called to get Nov appt and was told 2 staff quit and he…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 10/20/24
WORKING FOR PEACE Psalm 4:8 NLT "In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O Lord, will keep me safe." Matthew 5:9 NLT Jesus' Words "God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God." THINK ABOUT THIS Do you lose peace often? If so... What tends to make you lose peace? Have you…
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DH doesn’t think we are married
my DH with vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s doesn’t recognize our home as his, doesn’t think we are married and has moved into a different bedroom. He tells me he’s not comfortable here and needs to move. Is it time for MC?
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Legal and Financial Transition
MY DH is in early stages of dementia, but I can see it accelerating. We need to shift responsibilities to me and also to our adult son. Though we own our assets and make decisions jointly, and it was he who insisted we revisit (together) our wills recently (thank goodness) DH has held the legal/financial reins for over 40…
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Sundowner
My wife has advanced dementia. 2 months ago she fell down from the top stair and suffered a TBI. She is in pretty bad shape. Physically she's not bad. Mentally equal to a 4-5 year old. She is 63. The hardest part of the day is 3:00. When sundown starts she gets desperate thinking she's done something wrong. Nobody loves…
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Seroquel too strong?
The doc recently prescribed it. My DW is small framed, which is perhaps a factor. But the first day she took it at breakfast - wham! - she fell asleep 2 hours later, woke up for 2 hours, then out (hard) again. I called the physician, said cut the pill in half tomorrow. I will try it but am still worried this will be too…
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My dear husband has left me
My dear husband died Friday morning, with me by his side, in his bed at memory care. The seven weeks leading up to this were probably the worst of both of our lives. I took him to the hospital on August 14 after two weeks of trying to deal with his spiraling agitation at home. Five days into that hospital stay, he stopped…
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And another question - this one about being able to judge the heat of water
My DH takes showers with help from me. Yesterday I realized he didn't have any towels, and I left him in the shower to go get some. When I came back (in probably 2 minutes) the bathroom was completely steamed up, and I stuck my hand in the water and it was so hot!!!! He used to take tepid showers because he hated hot…
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Is a diagnosis of any benefit?
Just left the third neurologist we've seen in the past year. Background: Last year Oct 2023 my husband was having problem with executive functions. He walked our neighborhood several times a day, went shopping with me, but easily surrendered his drivers license, and all control of our finances to me. This Oct 2024, he…
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Just venting
I know most of you have been through this, just need to let some of it out. How do you deal with all the negative and getting angry at the least thing. Maybe angry is the wrong word. Dh can't stand the dogs to bark or the least little wait or what he precedes as not the way it should be. I'm always wrong or it's my fault.…
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Traumatic Head Injury and Rapid Decline
Several months ago, my DW was assaulted by an employee at her MCF. The attack resulted in serious injury to her head and a couple of weeks in the hospital. Prior to the injury DW could perform all Activities of Daily Living quite well. I was able to take her out of the facility for dinner and rides around town. To be sure,…
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Early incontinence question
I would appreciate a little counsel. My DW with is still pretty self sufficient. She was diagnosed about a three years ago. She has had just three accidents over the past few months. She also has anosognosia and doesn't have a clue why she's had the urinary accidents. Each time she's had an episode it was when we were…
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The essence of living in limbo
So my son and his fiancee are planning a destination wedding in the spring. This ought to be unadulterated happiness....but honestly, my first thought is how much easier it would be if my partner is gone before then, how much more I could enjoy it if I didn't have to worry about getting back. And of course I feel guilty…
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Progression from hospitalizations?
My DH has been hospitalized repeatedly this summer for aggression/agitation. After each hospitalization he seems a little worse. He gets better, but not back to where he was. Last Sunday he went from the Geri-psych unit to the ER and then a medical floor with aspiration pneumonia. The doctors say his pneumonia is…
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NA
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I Just Don't Care About Work Anymore
As many of you know, we moved from the SF Bay Area about two years ago to a small, rural town far, far north. We thought then that my DW might just have exhaustion from the stress of 17-years as a caregiver for both of her parents who had dementia. I was lucky to get a good job in my field up here, but the rest as a cure…
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Need to talk to someone
My husband is 73. I did not know about anosognosia and I was so relieved to read about it on this site. We moved to another state 5 years ago (right before COVID) to be closer to our daughter, her husband and our grandson. It has been a rough transition for my husband. COVID kept us from meeting new people and my husband…
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First MC Visit
I haven't been to visit my wife since placing her in the memory care facility on the 22nd. The thought of seeing her fills me with dread. I'm worried about how we'll both handle the emotions, and I fear she might think I'm there to take her home, which would cause her unnecessary pain. The activity director and the rest of…
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Veterans Home
Is there anyone else other me who has Dementia and is on the waiting list to get in to a Veterans home like I am? I'm on the list to get into the new Veterans home near Boston and it is state of the art each veteran has his own bedroom and bathroom.
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Memory care Monday
Provided everything goes smoothly, my husband is moving into a memory care facility on Monday. I’ve struggled with this but, as the kind people here always say, safety has to be top priority. This morning my sweet husband, who rarely talks at all and never speaks above a whisper, told me with his full voice, “I’m ok.” He’s…
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A life well lived
DW is 72 and has been on this road for 14 years . 7 years with me as 24/7/365 caretaker. 7 in a memory care facility, It is more than five years since she had the slightest idea who I was and has had little or no cognitive functioning for 4 years. She will swallow food put in her mouth and that is it. She has no other…
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Missing him so much today…
My husband Lonny passed August 12. MY HUSBAND, MY ANGEL. Your Battle is Now Over. No More Pain No More Suffering. I Still Do Not Understand Why This Happened to You. But I Am Proud to Say You Are My Husband, A Great Man, My Soulmate. Now You Are My Angel, So Spread Your Wings Out Wide, Please Wrap Them Around Me Whenever…
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Just need to talk to my friends (199)
September 1 is a good time to begin 199. Hope everyone is having a good Labor Day weekend. I am ready for cooler weather. This Oklahoma summer has not been good. We have had drought, grasshoppers and now army worms.
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I just want more time.
4 years, 1 month, 1 day. From diagnosis to my husband is gone. I don't know how to process. I want him back. I am not even sure why I am writing this. I feel like I just joined this forum, trying to understand the why. And no, I don't understand. He fought hard. It doesn't make sense. I am sad. I am angry. I am numb. I am…
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Wife has stocks in her name
my wife has some securities in her name, what can be done if you don’t want to sell just now, can you have transfer to my name or what to do??
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Agitation and paranoia
My DH is convinced that I am leaving him for another man. I don’t know where this came from. He is very confused and hallucinating all the time. Now I am also trying to solve non-existent issues that he has imagined. He sees and talks to people in our house all the time. I know we are not supposed to argue or try to use…
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Short-term rehab facility vs. home care ?
DH is in the hospital and they want to release him to Short term sub-acute rehab facility. He was in for a fall but he is not seriously hurt - except for the agitation/aggression/anxiety and some balance issues. The hospital won't let him out of bed at all. He begs to come home. The list of facilities available changed…