-
Any advice on potty issues?
I am caregiver to both my parents right now, my mom with AD and Dad with D. Dealing with Dad yelling at mom because he can't remember that she can't remember. She is to the point where she tries to pretend she understands what you say, but literally understands next to nothing of what you say. And Dad forgets things and on…
-
In-Home Respite Care
I am new to posting. My DW was diagnosed with ALZ about 5+ years ago. Her Neurologist says that she is toward end of MS ALZ. I am her only caretaker and spend nearly all of every day with her. I need to to get her to accept someone coming to the house so that I can get some respite time but she is adamant that she doesn’t…
-
Memory care placement update
as some of you may recall I placed my sweet Tommy in memory care 2 weeks ago. It was soul sucking, one of the worst things I’ve ever had to do. The placement day was terrible but I followed the doctor and directors instructions and didn’t visit for the first 2 weeks. I went today for my first visit and it couldn’t have…
-
The incontinence blues - I'm not handling it well
We've had a couple of rough days. Over the last few weeks my husband has moved into full time incontinence. He's been incontinent for a while, but until a few weeks ago it was almost always urinary and not all the time. Then The last 48 hours... Fecal incontinence and he's fighting me hard on clean-up. He won't let me…
-
Communication problems
For the past month or so my DH does not make sense when he tries to communicate. He cannot find the right words for what he wants to say and most words he uses for nouns or pronouns are made up words. He still talks quite a bit, more so late afternoon or early evening but never anything that is reality, as no longer is…
-
Just venting about driving...
My DH hasn't driven for over 2 years now. I don't mind driving us around everywhere but it takes all of my patience to stay calm. He hates any little bump so I have to drive around them if I see them. I'm either driving too fast or too slow. I have to park EXACTLY between the two white lines (he gets out to check, then…
-
Helping Dad understand the diagnosis...with anosognosia
Hi, our Dad was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer's and we're looking to help him understand what this means/how it will change some of what he needs. Is there someone—a clinician, a social worker, or a group that we can go to in order to have an open conversation, where he (and we) can ask questions about his diagnosis…
-
Behavior: Dangerous, harmless and something in between
When I see a PWD attempt something dangerous, I put a stop to it, even if it results in some agitation or disagreement. For example, despite my best efforts, a PWD can attempt to jam a fork into a live electric toaster to pull bread out. So I can't "live in their world" in this case and sometimes I can't spend every single…
-
Support for LGBT spouses
hello, my wife has recently been diagnosed with EO. Anyone know of any support sites for LGBT spouses? Thank you.
-
Compulsive behaviors
1st time here. My DW of 47 years is in final stages of dementia, she's on hospice. Mostly non communicative, incontinent, but can walk. She is on a liquid diet as she can't swallow solid foods. I am essentially her only caregiver. I can handle most things but she drinks too much, milk, water, protein drinks etc. Then she…
-
HELP me please
So I’m a 38 yr old caring for my 88 yr old grandma with dementia/alzhiemers at my home. Well she is starting to get physically MAD and throw things at me and hit me with my 2 yr old son around. Someone please tell me what do I do?? I have to learn how to control myself and my mouth and my anger bc i honestly feel like…
-
Visiting friends said parents looked great not sure how to respond
First of all, my parents do not "look great" as a family friend told me after she visited my parents at their ALF. To me, it is so obvious they both are on a decline with several challenges that have taken a toll on me emotionally and sometimes physically and I find such a statement is invalidating. How do you reply to…
-
Having surgery.
Hello all, I plan on having surgery soon and I have been told that i could progress because of this. I guess it will be a “twilight” type of sedation. So, not sure if anyone has ever gone through and felt off after?
-
I'm shaking as I write this
Today was supposed to be a happy day. I had invited some close friends over to thank them for all their help during my recent move. Right after they arrived the MC called. It was the social worker and her voice told me something was wrong. She told me my DH had tried to get too friendly with a volunteer. She said the…
-
Pleasantly flabbergasted
just had to post this, sent to me this afternoon. I left my partner asleep as usual about 2 pm. The picture is nothing special, but she actually got up and for the first time ever (remember we’re 2.5 years in) joined a group activity! The director was as surprised as I was- hence the picture. Will wonders never cease….time…
-
T
I
-
Broke my heart
-
We were turned down for memory care for my DH at the CRRC where we live
My husband has been diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia. We moved to a CCRC 8 months ago and paid the initiation fee to guarantee his care. Today I was called to a meeting and informed that the memory support facility here cannot handle his case. They now want to send him to another facility that requires 2 years…
-
bio-identical hormones
Any practical experience here about bio-identical hormone therapy such as BioTe with your LO? My DH (mid-stage, EOAD) and I both have used this therapy for about four years, and I know there is a wide variety of thought about use, but I'm curious about experience by others, especially as it relates to the testosterone…
-
He has moved out.
I am trying to follow up on my discussion “the straw that broke this camel’s back”. I have got him to move back to his condo but he his having a difficult time adjusting. He is capable of doing all his daily living functions…bathing, dressing, meals, driving, cell phone, etc. I cannot get him to understand and accept that…
-
We have not yet been offered any dementia specific drugs
Is this problematic? My mom has been difficult to diagnose. Thankfully she did stay at the doctor's office long enough to get a cognitive assessment which diagnosed her with moderate to severe cognitive decline from unspecified disease. I have another post here about the mess with trying to get medications for her (the…
-
removed
-
stress
Hi I am the eldest of four children with a mom who has dementia. We live outside of the United states. She's 80 and back in March had a 2nd hip replacement on the same hip. My siblings and I sort of rotate a schedule of staying nights with mom. we have someone during the day. It s stressful for me being the eldest it…
-
If I’m the caregiver, is he the caretaker?
What I’ve learned today … Just because my open thermos of coffee isn’t in the car’s cup holder after church doesn’t mean it was left behind. (We even turned around and drove back and went into church and searched for it. No luck. Figured it was just gone until hours later discovering that it had overturned on the passenger…
-
Tell me a story, of a move to memory care that went well.
Please… Mom moves next Friday. Can you tell me your positive stories? Maybe give me some hints of what will help. Maybe give me a sense of reassurance that this will be good.
-
The Cavalry Is Not Coming
Reposting for the new platform. I have not posted here for quite a while, and I want to let you know that I am still here. I hope you all are doing well, and I also have a thought process to share with you. October 1, 2022 will mark seven years since my wife’s dementia became obvious, and that I knew for certain that this…
-
I'm beaten down
No formatter is installed for the format not-found
-
Disability application
Hi! I'm new to the group, am a spouse caring for a loved one diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's (age 63). He is still working but it's getting harder. It seems like he should apply for disability, but I'm not sure where to start. I will need to help him a lot with this process, and I also work as the main wage earner,…
-
MCFs - Larger MCF Facility vs Adult Care Home
I am starting to look at MCFs for my DH as a backup plan for now but I do think I’ll end up placing him within the next year. So far I have only looked at 3 institutional MCFs with 20-30 beds. Some people have suggested that I look at the smaller Adult Care Homes. My DH is very private, doesn’t always want to talk to other…
-
Partner
No formatter is installed for the format not-found