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Questions about end of life
Hey everybody. This is my first post. I’m curious to get an idea if my mom’s sudden crying, lack of communication ability, not being able to walk, is truly a sign of the beginning of End of Life. She still eats well, has no ailments(besides the obvious), and the memory care unit is saying she’s sleeping well. Any advice or…
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Where do We Go From Here
I live in the east & my sister in the southwest. Our mother, 79, lives alone in the midwest. In May, she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. The plan was to move her to my sister's place this fall; everyone agreed it was the best place for her to go. In June, my mother started changing for the worst. First, she unpacked…
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Dad with UTI
Yesterday, my mom called me and told me dad got nauseous and threw up shortly after breakfast. He fell and couldn't get off the floor. My mom called hospice and they called 911 to just pick him off the floor and onto his bed. When I came over, my dad was on the floor again next to his bed. He tried to get out of bed to his…
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My husband’s suffering is over
my husband Lonny is now guarding the Gates of Heaven. He served in the Marine Corps in Vietnam. He passed peacefully today. My heart is breaking but I’m thankful he’s no longer suffering. See you later LonHo!
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NEED HELP
So........ I am concerned about the way my patient is being treated/punished/redirected (what ever you want to call it). She is 93 years old and has been diagnosed with Alzheimers approx. 4 years ago. I will jump right to the concerns I am having....... She is sometimes a bit bossy, rude, ungrateful....etc. So when she is…
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Update on long distance mother
I posted once earlier this year and have struggled ever since. This year has been very strained with her continuing to be angry and blaming that we have taken everything from her. She continues to hang up on me if I call. My 89 yo mother was dx 11/2 years ago we think she progressed to moderate stage but hasn’t been back…
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Reposting for new member yummiep
Hi all, I am new here but I also have similar situation. I actually am looking for adivce. My parents are in their 90s, and both have dementia. Mom has hernia and colon cancer. They too, pretend that everything is okay; and most of the time I found out through the helper whom my dad dislike. He claims she steals all the…
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Medication at assisted living
Mom was prescribed a cream for eczema to be given to her twice a day. Mom only uses it when she thinks she needs it. Staff tells me she is refusing it. When I talked with mom about this and tell her the doctor wants her to use this she tells me no one told me that. AL tells me they can’t force her to use it or take any…
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The End of Alzheimer's
Hello, i'm new here. Months ago, my husband asked if i'd research Alzheimer's for him. He's noticing some congnitive decline. i resisted but then this book came to me: "The End of Alzheimer's" by Dr. Dale E. Bredesen. i read it and am 1/2 through his next book: "The End of Alzheimer's Program". i'm wondered if anyone here…
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Aphasia
Hi all, Though I had seen some things early that concerned me about my DWs brain health, the thing that really stood out about her cognitive decline was a moment when she went from being able to speak, to suddenly unable to find words. She may have had slight word-finding issues earlier, but they all seemed like early…
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How can we talk to my dad and help him understand he needs help - we're just starting this journey
My mom is now starting to show show signs of dementia after several years of memory loss and early stages of Alzheimer's. Which we knew was coming, but my brother and and I are recently learning more finally getting permission to access medical records. After talking to my mom's dr. I also learned that he has been…
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Medicaid
Does anyone know about Medicaid in Ohio My dh had Medicare and insurance. We have only been married 5 years. I had the house before we were married. Will they use this as his income? Yes I know I should speak to eldercare lawyer but they are so expensive.
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Driving while impaired
There are two ladies in my support group who, being unwilling to confront the issue, still let their husbands drive. At the last meeting, they both admitted that they were starting to look into memory care facilities. They do know that their husbands won't be able to drive once they're admitted, right? It's actually…
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what is my aim? I still feel like I'm missing something
Hello dear community, I did take a break from visiting Dad. Mainly because it seemed to be upsetting for him. I've applied your advice (shorter visits, take someone with me, bring a treat to eat, stay in common area spaces) and it helped a lot. I do not go as often and I apply the wise advice given here when I do go. I…
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ideal living situations?
DW was diagnosed with MCI two years ago, she is still pretty independent, driving well, etc. But that is changing as may be expected. We are both 78, in reasonably good health and pretty active for our age. One area of concern regards our future living situation. We live independently in our home of 50 years. I can see…
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Resident is angry only at loved ones
I attend a family support group at a local dementia home (my Mom lived there for a year before she died.) A daughter and father have moved their mother/wife into a MC facility recently. She is angry at them & won't talk to them when they try to chat. The resident may be doing something enjoyable with staff, but when she…
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book recommendation
Currently reading Loving Someone Who Has Dementia, by Pauline Boss. I recommend it highly. It reiterates much of what she wrote in Ambiguous Loss and has a lot of excellent advice for caregivers
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Recent passings
Wally Amos, of Famous Amos Cookies fame, passed from complications due to dementia at age 88. Gena Rowlands, award winning actress, passed from Alzheimer's Disease at age 94.
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Hitting and imaginary person
My bf 45 eoa has been hitting, punching, squeezing his hand so hard that he is bruised and swollen sometimes. He ia convinced that it is someone else. He said "this is me, mine" about his right hand. "Thats hlm, that's not mine" about his left hand. This "person" takes his things and hides them. He has been on olanzapine…
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Mover closer?
Hi, I may have posted this earlier in a wrong or little visited place so I', posting here too hoping for some advice from those who have experienced this. Short back story, my wife has been in memory care in Fresno Ca. for 2 1/2 years. Her son lives seven miles from where she is and sees her twice a week. She is currently…
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Just need an emotional release
The evenings are bad for me. I miss my mom. I miss sitting here with her, enjoying TV on the couch, and being close to her. I miss being her daughter. I know, I know. I still am at some level, but everything has changed so quickly. I've had to do so much in such a short period of time. Decided she needed to go to the ER,…
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How to find a doctor to do capacity assessment for DPOA
We've been dealing with Mom's dementia for a while now, and we really need to activate her DPOA. It requires us to get an assessment from two "licensed physicians." Problem: I called Mom's doctor, and they had no clue. The office people don't think the doctor has ever done that. I don't know what kind of a process I need…
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Siblings involvement in parental care
Does anyone who is caring for their parents have siblings who choose not to be involved and how do you deal with it?
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I just need to say...
Making a king-sized bed by yourself, with all the protective layers, and a tired husband who keeps trying to climb on before you're done, is a pain in the rear. No need to reply - you know it's true. Goodnight friends.
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Behavior change in dad, how to help?
My dad is 80yo, ALZ/VD and in AL. He is stage 5 (DBAT) and so far has always known who I am. My husband, son, dog and I stopped in to visit him. He was sitting in one of the common areas. We came in and said “hello!”, and I let him know it was me (just in case). He looked crossly at all of us and said “I want to be alone.”…
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National Academies’ Forum GLP-1R agonists
This discussion is open to the public and there is an option for attending virtually This is the class of meds that are being used for diabetes and weight loss. They are exploring their affect on neurodegenerative diseases…
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Things for mom to do
My mom lives 5 hours away. She refuses to take part in any of the “activities” that are available at her ALF. She does not like games of any kind, puzzles, etc. She has a piano in her room which she plays periodically but otherwise she just sits there and watches TV. She has asked me “what am I supposed to do here?” And…
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Emotional Abuse
Hi there, This is my first post and, I'm really desperate for help or advice. I am moving cross country to care for and support my mother who was just diagnosed with Alzheimer's (though, I think this has been progressing over the last several years). I am doing everything I can to help her and it never seems like enough or…
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help
Hello everyone, I have my grandfather who has senile dementia and they discovered it 5 years ago. I live with my grandmother and my grandfather. My grandmother is the one who takes care of him but she has a strong character and has no patience and when my grandfather tells her who wants to go to work or something else, for…