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Burn out
how do you all deal with burn out! I just visited my sister, her situation is dire. Can’t walk (broke hip 2 years ago - the original reason she’s at assisted living; then broke both legs a year later - her fermur bone literally snapped, the other leg broke when she went down ), legs severely swollen (she refuses to elevate…
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Need support hubby needs assisted living
I’m at my wits end. I can’t handle having him here anymore. He’s having incontinence a few times a week. Sleeps until noon or 1 pm. Can’t remember last time he showered. I gave up on asking him. Didn’t shave etc. I just had talk with him saying it might be a good idea if we move him to assisted living. He just stared at me…
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How much longer does my dad have to be humiliated
my dad was diagnosed ALZ Dementia and aphasia in 2020. He was able to live in his house with little assistance for 2 years then just needed more and more help and got more and more confused. I had to place him in MC in august 2023 but he was still walking everyday and pretty good at trying to communicate. In the last month…
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Donepezil side effects
My mom has been on donepezil for a little over a month. I felt like the pills were making things worse for a while, but the last couple of weeks she seems to have been a little better, remembering more conversations and walking me through her bookkeeping process. I was starting to feel hopeful. She’s been complaining that…
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For my auntie
Just joined, walking in Tinley Park Saturday, interested in starting a support group at a wellness comm center.
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Home health and help
So, my father in law has dementia. Me and my wife stay a whole lot with him. We live beside them on their land. They have a will but not a living trust. In Mississippi if you go into a nursing home just your will, will not help save your assets. They have Medicare part b and d I know. My question is will the SS insurance…
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Moms eyes are shut
Anyone visit their LO and find their eyes shut from guk? I used a wash cloth with warm water but could not get her to open her eyes today. Any advice? I asked the CNA and no help. Other than that I kissed, hugged and prayed with her.
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Is there really a good place?
What is the point of memory care? I feel like my mom won’t ever be happy anywhere. Couldn’t hack it in assisted living. But I have never seen her this depressed. Like what is the point of any of these places?
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Mom with MCI and low dbp
Hello dear community, I usually come to you with questions about Dad in MC. This time I am concerned for my Mom. She still lives independently with an MCI diagnosis. Last fall and winter were really rough for her. So as daylight lessens and chily nights creep in I find myself watching her even more than usual. Anyway, she…
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So confused. I don’t know what to do.
I just read Clarinetist’s post about Plan D. I think I’m in the exact same predicament. DH has been in and out of hospitals in at least 8 different nursing units since mid July. He had been doing pretty well but sundowning with quite a bit of aggression kicked in. During these pat. 2 mos. He had one unsuccessful GPU stay.…
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Need help for my mom
My step father is caring for my mom who is quite advanced, she doesn’t really get any interaction with anyone, they live in a small town in Nevada so not many resources there. My step dad is slowly losing it with my mom, short fuse and all, he wants to put her in a State home but mom still recognizes everyone , just has a…
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Hospital vs. MC (warning: graphic description of injury)
Yesterday morning I got a call from MC that they had called 911 to transport mom to the ER. The MC staff found mom sitting on the floor with a "bad cut" on her arm. When I asked if they were sure she needed the ER, they told me she would need stitches. When I asked if I could take her instead of sending her by ambulance,…
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Lecanemab
Has anyone started or familiar with the latest drug approved last July 2023 - Lecanemab -- What would be the benefit?
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fall vaccines
Curious to know how others have approached the issue of getting vaccines (COVID, flu, RSV) for your LO with dementia. My mom is later stages now where taking her out of the house, even to a doctor's appointment is becoming a big challenge. There are no options I can find to provide vaccines in the home. Considering how…
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When do you take the keys?
mom is in the early stages. She loses her phone and is surprised that all she needs is her pocket book to start the car (keyless ignition and “key” in her purse). She does drive to the same three places all the time and the doctor said she passed “that part” of the cognitive test. Given that she came to my house the other…
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Specific delusion help
Hi all, My 88yo Dad has mid- to late- stage mixed Alz/vascular dementia and lives in memory care. I did read some other threads here on delusions and got the basics down. For about a week now he has a delusion: he is in a hotel in Houston (Texas), a medical conference has just finished, and he needs to get back to Wichita…
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Sometimes you just can't win
So...my brother. He just sent me an email telling me that I was using an old email address for him. I checked. The last two emails that he sent me was from that old address. Now, I have to be certain that I'm using his preferred email address (no matter which one he used) or he'll think I'M confused. Sigh.
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Zaleplon 5mg to sleep
has anyone used this medication to help sleep at night? Prescribed by my dads doctor sometimes it helps sometimes it doesnt. Any feedback thanks
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Arguments about travel that is unrealistic
This is such a wonderful forum full of caring people. I am struggling with a difficult topic with my DH and need suggestions. DH is diagnosed with vascular dementia but doc doesn't give other particulars. DH has a long list of comorbidities including heart failure, COPD, very high risk of falls including about 15 serious…
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He wants to see my list
I've been concerned about my DH moving into dementia for 5 years. It's been slow but seems to have speeded up. I keep a journal of behavior changes I've noticed. So, yesterday we had The Talk. I handled it very badly although I'm not sure what a good way would be. (We've talked about the possibility before but he doesn't…
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A Deeper Way
I read this today and thought I would pass it along. The words in parentheses are mine. Written by James L . Smaller in Flying Solo. “When I think about how I leaned on my wife (husband) , I have to say that her (his) support helped me function in some immature ways. Her (his) strength and support continued the illusion…
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ALZ, a time to laugh or chuckle, a time to cry
Just sharing a weird thing… DH in ES ALZ…We went to church and sitting in our usual aisle seat. ( I am immuno defecient so always try not to be between people). Some people wanted to be seated down the pew, so I bent my knees to the side to let them pass and DH flopped his legs up on the pew to let them pass. Yes, it's a…
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Altumview "touchless" sensors for fall detection, wandering, etc.
Anyone have experience with Altumview's service and device? It's not a pendant or a bracelet, but a device that monitors human activity (falls, leaving bed, wandering, etc.) and alerts you if something unusual occurs. It's like a camera, but converts people into stick figures in the video, so that you're not recording…
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Feeling defeated
I am new to this forum and after reading through other's posts, I finally feel validated and not alone. I am the caregiver for my Mom who was diagnosed with dementia 2 years ago. She has been living with me for approximately a year after needing more care than could be provided at the ALF she was living in. She has become…
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It's been almost 17 months since I lost Jan
I was reading last night in bed which I do every night for an hour or more til I get sleepy or can't see the darn print anymore. I started to get the coffee shakes so I got up and got a cup. At the kitchen sink I have a window and on both sides of it she has a big cat she made and painted. It was if I had never seen them…
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Insurance Company informed my Mom that I've been making medical decisions for her
Help. My mom was diagnosed with moderate to severe dementia in July. Since then, using the POA paperwork, I've been able to discuss her medication regimen with the geriatric pharmacists and have had long discussions with her geriatrician. Today when she called into Kaiser, (that is the name of the insurance company…
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I’m going to scream
When my mother was initially referred to a neurologist over the summer, they referred her to someone who didn’t have an appointment for several months(October). She made the appointment. In the meantime, they referred her to another doctor. We canceled the first doctor. Tests were done, meds were ordered. She has a follow…
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Memory Care, Early Retirement, or Keep Pushing On?
Hi Friends, it's been a while. For all the exhausted caregivers out there who are also still working to put food on the table, how many times a month (or a day) do you wrestle with this multiple-choice test? Should I give up and place my dear wife in memory care, so I have the energy to continue working? (Sacrifice $$ for…
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Figuring out my plan D
After spending the summer in several Geri-psych units, my DH is back at his memory care. He’s been on Seroquel and Risperidone, and is currently on Zyprexa. A week ago, Depakote was added. But the aggressive incidents continue. I’m concerned that his memory care placement is endangered. He is physically in good shape, so…
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Is palliative care a good option for someone with dementia?
My wife is in AL, recently moved from MC. She was aggressive and refused medication or seeing a doctor. I'm hoping to bring her home in a month, she is doing well on the meds in the facility. Is palliative care a good option?