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Father on a fixed income
My dad is located in CA and is living on a small fixed income (less than $2,000 a month). He has zero savings and I am not in a position to help fiscally or in a position to have him live with me. Trying to find any additional help has been impossible. Does anyone know of organizations that help. He is currently in a…
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Sad realization
As things progress, despite the number of trips each day and distractions along the way (stopping to visit family, watch sailing competitions at local college, run an errand, stop at A&W for a shake and burger (our first date included A&W) or whatever, is seems that we are increasingly unable to find “home”. The arrival at…
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Suggestions on how to introduce companion services, please?
I think it's time for companion services for my DH. His friends have slipped away and I know he is lonely. I can fill some of his friendship needs, but he definitely needs more socialization. It's been suggested that I start introducing a new "friend" to him but how do I do that? It has also been suggested that I introduce…
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SOS- is Zinc Oxide (20%) Cream Edible?
Driving & look in the mirror… DH looks like he just had the best meal ever. Smeared all over his mouth & chin & he’s chewing! Pulled over & see he’s retrieved the butt cream from our “go” bag. And has a plastic SPOON with half a bite left on it.!!! I wiped out as much as possible (getting bitten) & am calling poison…
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Attitude issue
My oldest and dearest friend died yesterday after an 18 month battle with glioblastoma. My husband doesn't remember her illness, our multiple visits with her or her death. He keeps asking how I am and reacts badly when he doesn't get a cheerful reply. I just can't do it, the grief is too great. This has added another layer…
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Power of Attorney
Hi. I'm new here. My mom is 90 and was diagnosed with vascular dementia about five years ago. The decline had been relatively slow, but getting significantly faster the last few months. I'm wondering about POA. While there's an advanced directive in place, I never thought about POA because 1) I'm the only child, 2) there's…
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Moving MWD To Indiana
Hi! My mom who lives in FL was diagnosed with ALZ in June 2023. It has progressed quickly that by December was confusing me with her deceased sister, missing medications, taking the next morning of meds after every nap, forgetting where my brother & I live etc. She lives alone in FL but has a boyfriend who comes over daily…
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POA and Uncle who is mad and is threatening to change it
Hi everyone. My sister and I are new to taking care of our Uncle who has dementia. My Aunt (his wife of 70 years) died last year. We have started seeing that he is declining. He says he has a million dollars in a bank that consumers can't even have accounts, he just went out and bought a brand NEW truck for 65k in cash and…
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How do I best help Mom, the caregiver?
Hello~ first post. My parents both turned 80 and Dad was officially diagnosed with stage 5 Alzheimer’s dementia the same week. His progression through early stages was very slow~ we’ve noticed little things for seven or so years~ but he had COVID in January, and the big slide began… I live 90 minutes away from them with my…
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Catheter
My dad, 88, with VD, has an indwelling catheter due to inability to void due to enlarged prostate. He refuses to take meds for enlarged prostate. Lately he's been asking the urologist to discontinue the catheter. He didn't want to wear it for the rest of his life. I understand it is very uncomfortable and painful. He asked…
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After EEG and MRI - Questions for Doctor
After reading here for a while, and becoming familiar with the Tam Cummings assessment tool I have some ideas of what's coming. I have read here that a good strategy is to provide the Dr a list of questions/concerns to be addressed during the appointment, but to do it out of sight of the PWD. There are things I've read…
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It’s not easy being green…
Before dementia and incontinence, we used to be so careful about recycling, using our own grocery bags and waiting til we had a full load of clothes before doing the wash. Living in California, we were careful about water use. Our regular trash bin was seldom more than about a third full. Now I order incontinence underwear…
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Devastating disease: Mentally, physically, emotionally, socially and financially
DH has been exhibiting executive function deficits for a long time. He was diagnosed with MCI 4 yrs ago and he is getting worse cognitively, physically, socially. Finally getting an assessment this Friday. I have accepted that he has dementia, (his mother died from ALZ and his brother too last year. I understand it is a…
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Mom is hitting; is it reasonable to expect an action plan?
I'm new here, struggling to find some info so any help is appreciated! - also, sorry for how long this is. Last fall, my sister and I convinced our dad to put Mom in memory care. She's advanced enough that she can't manage personal hygiene or communicate her needs effectively. Mom has this fun thing where she often has…
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Long Term Health Care
I have been starting to look at our LTC policy and information as things progress. One thing i have trouble understanding is the 90 Day waiting period (that’s what we have). It has been described as a ‘deductable’. I’m guessing you have to spend so much to get to the 90 day point, what i cant find is what counts and how it…
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Is it normal to hate your parents?
Every last bit of empathy I had for my parents is gone. It has been a long road, and there is no end in sight. I want to be done with them. I believe both mom and dad now have dementia. Mom's condition has been clear for about six years and she has steadily declined. Dad's just became apparent recently. Mom is 86 and dad…
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Wondering ...
How would you handle this? A relative regularly calls me to check up on us, and I’m very grateful for that. But nearly every time I talk to her, she says to me that she’s so glad that although her husband has numerous health issues, at least she can have a coherent conversation with him. And every damned time she says…
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Question for this beautiful but lonely Sunday
What is more detrimental, the physical or emotional toll of a caregiver’s day?
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Ups and downs in late stage Alzheimers and Hospice
hello, My husband is 71 with late stage Alzheimers and vascular dementia, diabetes etc.. He has been in hospice care since March 8. Hospice was recommended by his PCP due to difficulty walking, incontinence, trouble swallowing pills, weight loss etc. Hospice gave him 6 months in March. Some days I think they are correct,…
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Feeding tube - Resource that's helping me discern this - (Catholic perspective)
Hello ALZ Connected, I've received much love and support over the years from ALZ Connected and ALZ specialists that I thought I would share a resource with you all. Since I'm Catholic this post is from the Catholic perspective. I think it could benefit anyone though going through deciding what's right, or not right, when…
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Is meeting someone new a possibility?
Hi. I am new here. My DH was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s a year ago. He is 57 and I am 49. He has mild to moderate symptoms. His behaviour started to slowly change about 8 years ago. Although of course then I didn’t understand why. Before we realised he may have dementia I had started contemplating the fact that I don’t…
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How do I respond?
Hello, I am new to this board and I’m not a caregiver, just a friend who recently found out that a dear friend of 40 years has early onset dementia. I’m afraid I don’t know much about the disease or its stages, but I know he’s had it for probably about 4 years. I reconnected with him a few months ago. Since then I’ve taken…
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Third generation in my family
Hello, my name is Tracy. I’m 66, and represent at least the third generation of Alzheimer’s in my mother’s family. Prior to my recent diagnosis, my maternal grandfather, my mother, and one of her sisters had Alzheimer’s. My husband and I started noticing my memory difficulties at least a year ago. Newer symptoms include…
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Anger and agitation - how much is too much?
Over the years I have managed to develop a lot of patience and compassion for what DH is going through. But, I really struggle with anger and agitation. Throughout our marriage we were never screamers. With this disease the occasional yelling, screaming, and verbal attacks are killing me. My stomach immediately ties up in…
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Activities for PWD
Anyone have ideas to help keep PWD active and engaged with something to do? I'm sure it depends on the stage. When I'm able to make a weekday, daytime visit to mom's MC, I sometimes find her sitting among the group that is doing an activity, but she is rarely participating in it. I have gotten her to do things like…
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Seroquel effects?
We started my MWD on Seroquel about a month ago, 12.5mg once each evening. It seems to have generally helped with that time of day. However, just over the past 7-10 days, she is now way more agitated than she used to be the rest of the day. From the time she wakes up until the evening dose, she is scared and wanting to go…
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My spouse can’t stop eating.
He goes out several times a day to buy food. He has hypertension and heart disease. He eats highly salted food. I am afraid he will have a stroke. Any one relate?
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Who offers Medigap for elderly people with dementia?
Hi All, my Mother is 81 years old and has dementia- I am needing to sign her up for supplemental health insurance because the MC facility I am trying to get her into requires it in addition to her Medicare. All the companies I have called so far to ask if they offer Medigap for someone with dementia have said no. I need…
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Tough Decision
I’ve posted a lot about mom’s move to MC and how amazing her facility handled things. She’s been there since August and it’s been hard (as expected), but mostly positive. Of course she says she wants to leave sometimes but I think everyone feels that. Now, it turns out the former director - who left shortly before my mom…
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Jo C, privacy and a good wishes thread
While I have been away a long time and only just discovered Jo C's illness, it is wonderful to see how many discussion board members care and are concerned. During our years together as Peer Volunteers, we often discussed how important our privacy was and how it was necessary to have boundaries to keep our identity…