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forgetting things
hi, yesterday mum found a coffee satchet in her handbag. she had no idea how it got there. i tried to reassure her as she was thinking oh did i steel it but my mother would never do such a thing. i told her what would of happen but she panicked for an hour about it and had a panicked attack and i had to give her a valium…
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Delusions- how to respond
Please help me with how to respond to delusions and paranoia. My parent is very paranoid about someone stealing his items. He often hides tools and important things, forgets where he puts it, but then accuses someone of stealing. How do I respond to this without upsetting him?
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moving into memory care, not sure if we should wait longer
My mom has been on the waiting list at a memory care facility for a long time. My sister and I are both burnt out. There is a room available now that shares a bathroom with another person. My mom hates sharing bathrooms with strangers and gets grossed out easily by other people in her personal space. I am not sure if we…
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have covid can’t visit MC
We had to move my dad who is 82 to memory care about three weeks ago because we couldn’t lift him to change him anymore. He’s in hospice with heart failure and the dementia. In the process my mom (80) and I (51) caught covid and it’s been a week but we are both still symptomatic and testing positive. We are brokenhearted…
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Can you be kicked out of MC for not complying with continence care?
I was not imagining the aids at my mom’s place were asking about taking her home. We had a follow up care meeting and the directors basically told me if my mom can’t become more compliant re: incontinence (mostly urinary) they may not be able to keep her. First off the big problem is their rugs. She needs her carpets…
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Caregiving for Parent when you have a full time job and a teenager
Good morning. I am new to this forum and located in Wichita, KS. My mother has some memory issues resulting from an unknown stroke about a year go but discovered after she had a fender bender last March. I am 55, work a full time job, have a 16yo at home and two dog :smile: . She has always lived independently (my dad…
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Mom is in Assisted Living now
After rehab we were able to get her directly into an Assisted Living in a new community. I was all set to go with the same community where she lived for simplicity, but they were unwilling to work with us to get her placed directly and wanted her to go back to her apartment for a week or two, even though they had a room in…
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Dealing with lawyers
so I’m hiring a lawyer as I was told by my mothers social worker, Went on NELF, I got told a meeting to discuss elder care would be $400 and a durable power of attorney will be an additional $700. Is this normal? If it is are you aware of any grants that could cover this or cheaper options to get a DPA?
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Perceived reality
My mom is having a day where her perceived reality is running wild. She believes that she will be going to go get food with another person. However, we do not have a car and she has had no contact with other people since she lost her phone at least a week ago. I haven't been able to replace it yet. She has asked me to go…
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Driving Stress and Key Keeping
Hello. Would love opinions today! My mom has stage 5 dementia. She is currently obsessed with driving again. She failed the cognitive exam and as a result, has had her license suspended. Her car lives in her garage. I have BOTH sets of her keys. One I swiped when she first exhibited scary driving symptoms (she doesn't know…
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I don’t know what to do, & no real support
My mom is 82, lives with me annd my husband and has VD, DM2,CKD4. She recently spent a week and 1/2 in the hospital after I found her non responsive for severe UTI w/3 ureter stones. Her blood sugars are wnl. We noticed even before her hospitalization she was sleeping more and saying she wasn’t hungry or that she was…
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Caregiver for parent diagnosed early in life.
Hi, My mother (60) was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s early this year. It’s been a big change for her of course but I am now her sole caregiver (F25). Running her life and taking over her finances. love my mom and I am so grateful I am able to be with her while she still is in the early stages. But I am struggling with getting…
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Can't wake her up. Has this ever happened to anyone?
While visiting my mom who has moderate dementia she fell asleep sitting on the couch next to me (she was snoring). When it was time for bed I went to wake her up and she would not wake up. My dad and I were shaking her, talking to her, laying her down on the couch but she never opened her eyes or responded to us in any…
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How much longer does my dad have to be humiliated
my dad was diagnosed ALZ Dementia and aphasia in 2020. He was able to live in his house with little assistance for 2 years then just needed more and more help and got more and more confused. I had to place him in MC in august 2023 but he was still walking everyday and pretty good at trying to communicate. In the last month…
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Donepezil side effects
My mom has been on donepezil for a little over a month. I felt like the pills were making things worse for a while, but the last couple of weeks she seems to have been a little better, remembering more conversations and walking me through her bookkeeping process. I was starting to feel hopeful. She’s been complaining that…
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Moms eyes are shut
Anyone visit their LO and find their eyes shut from guk? I used a wash cloth with warm water but could not get her to open her eyes today. Any advice? I asked the CNA and no help. Other than that I kissed, hugged and prayed with her.
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Is there really a good place?
What is the point of memory care? I feel like my mom won’t ever be happy anywhere. Couldn’t hack it in assisted living. But I have never seen her this depressed. Like what is the point of any of these places?
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Mom with MCI and low dbp
Hello dear community, I usually come to you with questions about Dad in MC. This time I am concerned for my Mom. She still lives independently with an MCI diagnosis. Last fall and winter were really rough for her. So as daylight lessens and chily nights creep in I find myself watching her even more than usual. Anyway, she…
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Need help for my mom
My step father is caring for my mom who is quite advanced, she doesn’t really get any interaction with anyone, they live in a small town in Nevada so not many resources there. My step dad is slowly losing it with my mom, short fuse and all, he wants to put her in a State home but mom still recognizes everyone , just has a…
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Hospital vs. MC (warning: graphic description of injury)
Yesterday morning I got a call from MC that they had called 911 to transport mom to the ER. The MC staff found mom sitting on the floor with a "bad cut" on her arm. When I asked if they were sure she needed the ER, they told me she would need stitches. When I asked if I could take her instead of sending her by ambulance,…
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When do you take the keys?
mom is in the early stages. She loses her phone and is surprised that all she needs is her pocket book to start the car (keyless ignition and “key” in her purse). She does drive to the same three places all the time and the doctor said she passed “that part” of the cognitive test. Given that she came to my house the other…
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Zaleplon 5mg to sleep
has anyone used this medication to help sleep at night? Prescribed by my dads doctor sometimes it helps sometimes it doesnt. Any feedback thanks
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Feeling defeated
I am new to this forum and after reading through other's posts, I finally feel validated and not alone. I am the caregiver for my Mom who was diagnosed with dementia 2 years ago. She has been living with me for approximately a year after needing more care than could be provided at the ALF she was living in. She has become…
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Insurance Company informed my Mom that I've been making medical decisions for her
Help. My mom was diagnosed with moderate to severe dementia in July. Since then, using the POA paperwork, I've been able to discuss her medication regimen with the geriatric pharmacists and have had long discussions with her geriatrician. Today when she called into Kaiser, (that is the name of the insurance company…
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I’m going to scream
When my mother was initially referred to a neurologist over the summer, they referred her to someone who didn’t have an appointment for several months(October). She made the appointment. In the meantime, they referred her to another doctor. We canceled the first doctor. Tests were done, meds were ordered. She has a follow…
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Considering moving in with parents
Hello, we are considering moving in with our parents because mom has dementia with anger and violent outbursts. Will she trust us more if we visit at regular times, or if we move in? She is quite paranoid of her husband already, hiding things from him. And he is the kindest most submissive man.
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Help! Thoughts?
Hi everyone, First time posting for me. My dad has been having memory issues since about the beginning of 2023, he denied he had any issues and only went to a neurologist once his PCP sent him in the June of 2023. Of course it took time to get the appointment. We did testing in December and he started to get worse after…
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Tips on Water Intake
Hi everyone! Happy (almost) fall :) I'm writing to ask if anyone has had any experience with their loved one not remembering to drink water. My mom has recently started on Lexapro to deal with her anxiety and depression, and I know from my own experience with Lexapro how dehydrating it is and therefore causes awful…