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How to cope with holidays?
Hi everyone - hoping all of you did ok on the holiday weekend! My holiday was super mixed. Brought my mom home had a good 3 days but it was of course hard transition for her back to MC. Also, I am her punching bag. When she gets upset, she lashes out at me. I am her primary caregiver, there’s only 1 other family member…
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Am I doing it all wrong?
My mother is 89 - diagnosed this summer with early onset. We moved to the house next door last year in an effort to have her age in place as long as possible. Everything seems to be accelerating now. I've been noticing cognitive decline since 2022. She scored 26/30 last year and 21/30 this year on her MMSE which seems like…
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And then there was one . . .
My mother has been in MC for a year and a month. For a while, Mom would call me and want to leave because she'd say, "these people here are not my people." I thought visits from her friends would make a difference, but she doesn't remember them. I see her every Sunday and sometimes after work, but she's usually sundowning…
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Dad is convinced my mom is leaving him
Hello, I am new to the forum. My stepdad has had early-stage Alzheimer’s for several years but now he has suddenly taken a dramatic decline. One of his fixations is that my mom is leaving him, divorcing him, taking the car and kicking him out of the house for another man. We have tried to reassure him many times, but of…
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Nightmares
Hey there! I’m new here, my dad is 78yrs old and has cognitive decline. He’s starting to have more life like nightmares and wakes up really scared not knowing where he is. Has anyone else experienced this?
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Trying to Do What is Best
We are about to hit the wall with rehab discharge and getting my mom into AL instead of letting her return to her IL apartment. This is going to be very hard since her perception of her abilities and safety issues does not align with reality and she is itching to get back to her bridge games and friends. She has a left arm…
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I think my dad is making bad decisions
my mother is now in assisted living, she has dementia. This is her second month.I asked my dad to stay away for a few days to let her adjust. She was verbally and physically abusive before being put in medication. She has a phone and calls him 10-12 times a day. He signs her out to go shopping and also takes her home for a…
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Journey continues
Hello all. I cant believe it has been 2 years since my first post on this forum. The journey continues. Mom has been in what I feel is a good memory care facility. The staff genuinely appear to truly care about all the residents and do the best they can. Most visits she will talk very little and no context when she does.…
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Seeking Support and Advice in a Challenging Situation
Hi everyone, I wanted to reach out to this community to share my experiences and hopefully gain some insights from those who may have faced similar challenges. I currently live with my parents, pooling our resources as we navigate financial difficulties. My father, who is in his 80s, is likely dealing with dementia or…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 10/20/24
WORKING FOR PEACE Psalm 4:8 NLT "In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O Lord, will keep me safe." Matthew 5:9 NLT Jesus' Words "God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God." THINK ABOUT THIS Do you lose peace often? If so... What tends to make you lose peace? Have you…
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Mother making serious allegations
We took my 78 year-old mother of a family trip with us. The trip went well and she seemed to have a really nice time. My mother lives with my sister where she is able to take a van to a day program during the week in the city and come to our house in the suburbs with us on the weekends. Yesterday evening she told us that…
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MIL moved in without warning, without a plan
Hi - I'm new here - and I'm feeling so everwhelmed. So my MIL has lived alone for the past 20 years- the past 5 she has been declining- we unplugged her stove- put a lock on the door so she couldn't go downstairs - etc. My husband is a procrastinator - we finally went to a lawyer last week (as for years his mother told him…
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hair trigger verbal aggression
I only see my parents a few times a year due to living 12 hrs apart. We are always excited to see my dad but not my mother as much. During the visit we try to do as much as we can for her to make the visit "smooth" however the moment she starts to get overwhelmed she snaps at her grandchildren. The grandchildren are…
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Parent with Early Onset Alzheimer's
Hi, I'm looking for a support group specifically for adult children of parents with early onset alzheimers. My mother is in her mid-60s and was diagnosed a couple years ago. As she is beginning to decline more and more I want to connect with others in a similar set of circumstances. Most people I speak with are dealing…
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Vascular Dementia
MIL was finally able to get into a neurologist and had an EEG and MRI. Also had a memory test and scored 6/30. When met with the NP who was sharing the results of the testing, she said her brain was smaller but that was due to her age (86). She told her that the EEG was fine but that she had some white spots on her MRI of…
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Following our Request
Mom moved in Sept 8th, she has moderate dementia, almost no short term memory, long term is pretty good, last 11 years or so are fuzzy. She was mild to moderate until she got a UTI and low sodium and was hospitalized for 3 weeks, now she's fully moderate. It's difficult because she can remember how to use the chair to get…
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New to the forum, and sooo many questions
I've been reading through many of the forums and getting familiar with topics. My dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer's several years ago; we moved him and my mom to Colorado because two of us four children live here, and we could tag-team their care. They moved into an AL facility near us; mom died of Norovirus within a year…
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Humor me and tell me I am not a bad daughter
Mom is safe and settling new place. She actually likes it most days. I go 3-4 times a week. My car is at the shop, a friend is visiting this weekend, and I want a break. Will be 4-5 days depending when car is ready, but truthfully I really just want a break. I called the place and they said they would tell her, and others,…
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Difficult sibling
Mom moved into a mid range $ AL about 6 months ago. I’m her DPOA. For the year prior she lived with my brother. He works and she was alone a lot. The doctor said she should not be left alone anymore. When finding a facility my brother did nothing. Didn’t even visit the place before she moved in. Well I made a big mistake…
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Refusal to go to any kind of DR./No Dementia diagnosis
My mom has had dementia for probably 10 years..ony now getting to late middle stage. She is completely uncooperative with doing anything involving Dr.s (even the dentist) . She throws an absolute fit, and my Dad refuses to just take her anyway. As a result, we have not been able to get her diagnosed, although it's obvious…
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It Begins
After my fathers inital diagnosis little while ago without a tear; today it hit me hard. A distant friend that my parents visited (with prior warning of the situation), spoke of how different my dad was generally and how in ~5yrs since last seeing both my parents the changes in my dad. Denial - for the longest time we've…
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Mom not wanting to eat
A lot has happened since my last post. In August, I took my mom to the ER because she was a little off. Found out she had a mild infarct and UTI. She was in rehab for 21 days. In September, my mom fell in the bathroom. I heard a thud, but didn’t know it was her until I heard her wail. Long story short, I took her to the…
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depakote as a mood stabilizer instead of atypicals?
Dad's NP at MC calls me to check in from time to time. She has mentioned depakote as a mood stabilizer instead of atypicals due to the black box warnings on atypicals. Dad has been here for almost 4 months. Her concerns for him are related to agitation and irritation - sometimes with another resident and sometimes in…
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Need guidance/ help
My mom's dementia has gotten worse and she's now constantly hearing voices of someone hurting me or me screaming for help. I had taken her to a neurologist a while ago and at that time she refused to take meds (she wasn't experiencing hallucinations at the time). It was hard to get an appointment with the neurologist again…
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Just a story
Just telling the story ... I know it's not uncommon, but also know that none of mom's family or friends want to hear this stuff. So telling people who understand. A staff member in my mom's room commented on a piece of artwork on her wall. My dad gave it to her as a gift decades ago, and she has always especially liked it.…
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Father packing to fly back home
Hello all, It’s been a minute. My father has been here about 3 months and we are now at a point where fiblets don’t work. He is now demanding to go home and even if I say we are figuring it out or I can’t because of work he is going to get his own flight to go home. (I am POA I have all his ids and credit cards) wifi is…