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Lost it, feel terrible
I lost it on my sweet Mom today. The circumstance doesn't matter, its not her fault, she has advanced Alzheimers for goodness sake. I lost it, yelled at her and lost patience with her. I know I am exhausted, the constant shadowing and lack of break over the holiday weekend didn't help but there is no excuse. I know I have…
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Moving elderly Alzheimers patients across the country
My Dad and his wife (89 and 85) live in Virginia. I live in Tucson. My stepmother has Alzheimers and my father has serious short- and long-term memory issues, but hasn't been diagnosed with Alzheimers. They have lived in a wonderful memory care (stepmom)/assisted living (Dad) facility since 2017. I am their only living…
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Me again with the same topic- when you feel most family is against you
I'm ready to break. I do it all and do everything to make mom happy. No else can be bothered. Her dementia is worse every day and she thinks I am the problem (she lives with me). This is just a vent session for me as I was ready to explode and had to get it out.
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AL companion or aide
Has anyone hired a aide for their LO in AL? My step father is in AL and is high functioning Alz. but I feel he needs more. I do not want to put him in MC until I absolutely have to. I feel if I hired someone, who hopefully would be a friend of a friend or family, He/I would get a more dependable situation. He needs someone…
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Any other caregivers in Hampton Roads area
Sole caregiver to 83 year old mother Looking for other caregivers in the HR area to support each other, exchange information, ideas, ect. Let's connect!
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I Live 3000 miles away from parents
Hello,It seems that many of us are dealing with similar situations with our parents. I am not sure that mine is much different except that we live on opposite coasts. My parents are extreme homebodies and have never liked to go anywhere. I moved to the opposite end of the country almost 40 years ago for school and then…
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I feel guilty not wanting to care for my mom
I have so much fear having my mother come and live with me in December. Her Alzheimer’s is progressing and I’m having to take care of all bills, financials, dr appts, etc… I never imagined having to take care of my mom at 30 years old, as a single mom with twin little girls. Also at my moms tender age of 58. She is…
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Question for those who have flown with their LO
Hi. I am considering flying with my DH to visit family and friends. My biggest concern is bathroom use during the flight. DH is not incontinent but sometimes gets confused about toilet use away from home. Would appreciate input from those who have flown with their LO at a similar stage. I could possibly squeeze in there…
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Disaster Preparedness Links For Caregivers
The links would not copy; but they are in the following Thread on the Spousal Forum: https://www.alzconnected.org/discussion.aspx?g=posts&t=2147557896 Will try again later and see if I can get the indiviual links list to copy over here. J.. J.
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Lost, need advice
Ok, so this is going to be long. Please bear with me. I feel it's important to give a bit of backstory so this all makes sense. Last year, my mom's health started declining. She's never been in great health, and has always had issues with her heart and diabetes. However, last year, she started having to ask for more help:…
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MC visits
I am hoping to get some help making my visits to my mother in MC more pleasant for both of us. Some background...Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s a few years ago and recently Vascular Dementia was added to her diagnosis. She and my dad were living in an independent apartment affiliated with an AL facility when Dad…
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Feeling guilty(5)
My mom has had dementia for quite some time and I have always handled her doctor's appointments, medications, grass cutting, etc. Even before the dementia, my mom had mental health issues and was pretty high maintentance. There were SO many times when she refuse to take anti-depressants and would call multiple times a day…
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SS payee rep and progress
I haven't posted for a while. I've made some incredibly good progress with my dad's situation. He has dementia, was scammed, and I am also dealing with my stepmother who is in denial and keeps going to my dad for guidance. I am now appointed as his payee representative for his social security. I got his updated Medicare…
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Moving a person with dementia
Hello, first post here. My 69 year old mother was recently diagnosed as having dementia, most likely due to Alzheimer's. She has been having memory issues for approximately 2 years, with more pronounced issues in the last 6 months (forgetting phone number, forgetting how to use appliances, asking where they are going in…
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Transfer from Acute to Short-term Rehab
Mom had pacemaker implanted last week after a terrible fall. She's 89 and frail to start with other health issues. The acute rehab was intensive for her and they wanted to discharge to the home when living space is unsafe (bedroom upstairs, cluttered hallways/spaces...) NOT conducive for a frail senior who is at risk for…
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Nursing Homes in SE Mass?
I'm curious to know if anyone on here is in the Southeast Massachusetts area and has placed a LO in a nursing home that accepts Mass Health/Medicaid. Lots of factors to consider and always prefer to get opinion from someone who's been through it.
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Caregiver feeling resentment, need advice
Hello! I am new to this forum. I have read several posts and it has been helpful reading other stories and feeling less alone. My MIL moved in with my husband and I and our three boys two years ago. Things were pretty good when she moved in. Since, then it has progressed to moderate. It has moved to her daily thinking I am…
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I'm terrified and don't know what to do
I'm so sorry, but this is going to be a long post. I don't know what to do or even where to go for answers. My mother doesn't trust doctors so I can't take that route. If she knew I was writing this post, she'd see it as a major betrayal. My mother is 81 years old and I know she has been suffering from some form of…
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Any suggestions on packing back up or anger?
We moved MIL near us about a month ago. Any suggestions or advice on dealing with a couple of things (we have a whole host of things we’re trying to manage/figure out but I’ll just start with 2!) 1) We moved MIL next to us about a month ago (against her wishes). She is continually focused on going back home. What do you do…
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Anxiety about upcoming assessment
The day is finally here, my grandmother is going to get assessed for her COPES/LTC application. I am terrified that for whatever reason, she will fail it. Like, she will have a really good day and they will say she is fine, when really, she needs her caregiver there all the time. If she doesn't get approved for some crazy…
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Where do I go from here
I'll try to make this short, I just don't know where to go from here, my father is very stubborn and refuses certain help, I need advice. My dad has always suffered from certain types of depression and have stopped working many times due to it. Mom and him divorced in 1996, he has been alone ever since, has dated here and…
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Caregiver Pay
This is an awkward subject. Pay for caring for a loved one. But the simple fact is, my wife and I gave up our lives we were building in California and moved home to South Dakota to keep my mom out of a nursing home during the pandemic. For 9 months now, since we walked into this buzzsaw on November 4th 2020, my wife and I…
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Any suggestions/strategies for bathing?
Mom is refusing help with bathing. She gets a CNA every morning through Medicaid because of physical disabilities she is in denial about (mobility/fall risk and vision). She is exceptionally stubborn about bathing. And she is suffering because of it. Here in Colorado it’s very dry and her skin is dry and she’s itching a…
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Where will she go? Where CAN she go?
Well it appears that MIL's extended stay at Sib #1's house will be short lived. Sib #1 and spouse are saying that it's too draining on them and that they can't handle MIL's revisions of family history and constant messiness. DH and I have already boxed her stuff up and DH has let it be known that MIL cannot and will not…
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Poem I wrote about my mom
What is she looking at? Who does she see? Does she know who I am when she’s looking at me? I am her daughter, the youngest of two. She shakes her head no but I swear it is true How could this happen, how could it be? My mother not knowing it’s me that she see’s I then ask her, who am I ,what is my name? She answers…
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need help getting the real story from my mom
Hi guys, new member. My mother has dementia and has recently been put into assisted living. She keeps calling us saying that she needs to go to a hospital, but she can't tell us what is wrong. I don't know what "hospital" means to her or what she expects to have done at a hospital. She only respects the opinion of men, so…
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Parkinson's Drug Tied to Increased Hospitalizations, Death
https://www.medpagetoday.com/neurology/parkinsonsdisease/94081
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Jo C. Hello from SuperWoman!
Time has marched, ran, and flown by at warp speed! Its been a long while since I have been able to drop in and say hi. Yet my thoughts have turned to you so often, Johanna. Your words brought peace and hope into my life at a convergence of my mother in laws alzheimers, my sons autism, bi-polar and schizophrenia, and my…
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An existential question re: my neighbor
I posted about my neighbor earlier. She is 89, a widow of one year, lives alone with her little dog. She has no children; her late husband has an elderly cousin. She is housebound, but has someone do her grocery shopping and a friend come to visit every week. I call her every day. She has returned to asking, why is she…
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Facility Suggestion
Hi everyone !! Last we checked in was a few months ago and we were having problems. I have been meaning to check in but haven't had the time since I myself have started a job on top of my other activities. Today we got notice that we have to search for a nursing home as the current location is giving him the notice of…