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Stringing sentences together
I was googling something that took me to this AARP page. It was kind of a jolt to see the woman in the video talking in complete, consecutive sentences. Is this "normal" EOAD? My brother seems to not go more than a couple of sentences with out getting hung up and starting to stammer and saying "um, um, um…"
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Medical alert watch band
My dad has Stage 5 ALZ and it is time to make sure he has a medical alert band - problem is he won’t wear a bracelet or necklace but he wears a watch - daily. Any ideas for a new watch band or add-on that acts as a medical alert? Thx.
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lots of questions
My husband has not been officially diagnosed, but I have tons of questions. If you are a caregiver for someone with dementia, I am wondering if they do these types of things. My husband is constantly dressing/undressing/putting on layers of clothing. He picks up couch pillows and puts them in the bathroom. Gets his shoes…
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Are home health care costs tax deductible?
I realize this is a loaded question that only a tax accountant in my home state (or) can answer but I wanted to do some research before engaging him. I have recently brought my wife back from a memory care facility and have engaged a home health care service to provide night coverage to address wandering. This is expensive…
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Changing Assisted Living Communities - VENT
Hi everyone. I'm new here and I am in the process of exploring the different discussions posted. I appreciate all of the information everyone has shared. It helps me to feel like we are in this together. I wanted to get some things off my chest and I didn't know where else to go. I am an only daughter and I care for my…
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best memories
Kathy (AnderK) wrote on another thread about spending seven months on a sailboat with her DH, and how precious that memory is, trying to honor it. Got me thinking it might be nice to have a thread about our best memories. That said, not all of us are fortunate enough to have had a great marriage, or a great parent-child or…
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POA
Hello, I just joined and this is my first post. It's a question that I need answered soon. My husband has had dementia for almost 10 years now. Two years ago I knew I needed to get a POA so we updated our will. Last year he was barely able to sign our tax return. This year he definitely won't be able to but I'm not sure…
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Apathy or depression
I am new to the forum and would like some help in understanding dementia related symptoms. I moved my 90 year old mother from an independent living facility in PA to an assisted living facility in Maine (where I live) in January 2020 when her dementia seemed to worsen suddenly. I did not realize the extent of her dementia…
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Eating(3)
My LO won’t eat sometimes. The hospice nurse says that if she’s not eating she’s not hungry. I’m having a hard time figuring out how much to gently push/entice /distract and feed. How do we determine how hard to try to get her to eat?
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The Results are in
The MRI shows deteriation of the brain in the area of memory suggestive Alzheimers. The testing rules out tumor, and stroke. He has prescribed a pill that is to be started as soon as the Rx is received. It is to be taken daily in the evening. He stated there were two other tests that could be done, 1) the spinal tap to…
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SSDI Rep Payee Accounting
Hello! When your LO is in a memory care assisted living unit, how have you allocated the expenses in your annual report? Did you enter the whole amount in food and housing? Or did you allocate some toward Other Expenses. Some of the fee they charge is a "care level" which wouldn't exactly be food and housing? Also, how did…
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To those whose Easter celebration looks different this year
Hello everyone. Happy Easter. This will be my first Easter without my mother who passed at the beginning of the year. My heart goes out to all of you who are celebrating a bit differently this year. May you rest assured that Jesus did triumph over the grave and may you have that peace that surpasses all understanding as…
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Widows social security question
Mom was switched from her social security benefits to my step-dads upon his death. Although they initially got it messed up, it got straightened out. However I’m trying to figure out one discrepancy. I thought she would receive exactly what he was getting. The gross figure she was told she’d get ( in writing) is about $54…
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Important article re: significant risks of hospitalization/ER for PWDs
Posting on both sites. This corroborates the experiences many of us have had with hospital or ER intervention causing more harm than good for our PWD LOs. The study focused on fainting or near fainting (syncope) as a reason for the initial hospital contact, but the overarching statements caught my attention and are why we…
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Boundaries
Hello all, It's been a while since I've written. I've been busy taking care of loved ones. My mother passed away a few months ago, she had dementia and other health issues. My oldest sister also has dementia. She is in assisted living (as was my mother for the last two years of her life). I have been taking care of both of…
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Large List of Caregiving Programs
Michael Ellenbogen sent me this large catalog of caregiving programs. I typed in my zip code and got quite a few programs outside my area, but still something useful might come up for caregivers here. https://bpc.caregiver.org/
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Compartmentalizing - avoiding my own behavior changes
I think this is about compartmentalizing. Let me know if the following makes sense, My caretaking behavior is starting to leak into my interactions with non PWDs. For example, some of my "conversation" w/ PWD is just repeating what they say. "Yes, it's sunny today". Or it can be agreeing with nonsense statements, or…
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Anticipatory Grief and Multilayered Guilt: What Do I Do?!?
*NOTICE: This is a long read. Thank you in advance for being willing to take time to read all of this.* I am a 31-year-old only child of a 78-year-old mother who was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in 2018 but showed contributory signs of the disease in 2015. I am a part-time college instructor who has chosen to move…
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After a stroke what should we watch for suspicious of altzimers or dementia
Someone in the home had a stroke a couple of years ago and did very little recovery assistance. Now told to live a normal life. Showing aggression, slurred speech, forgetting things, hygiene issues, bladder issues. Possible depression and lack or motivation spends 10 or more hours a day watching TV. How do we help is…
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Running out of steam…for now
This will be mostly a vent session, I think. I’ve been running on empty the last few days. After a few weeks of intense caregiving and helping my youngest son through some unresolved health issues, I’m finding my “endless love” for my husband with Alzheimer’s to be fading & my super positive attitude turning sour. I guess…
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Much too fast, much too slow
When we adopted our son as an infant, a wise friend told me that no matter how long we had waited and how hard we had tried to have a child, I was still allowed to wish he would just hush up and go to sleep! I think that’s true for all of us with our PWDs. No matter how awful it will be, we’re allowed to sometimes wish for…
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New Florida help for caretakers of PWD
I heard about this new government service in Florida today. They didnt give many details, but they mentioned ‘support’ for caretakers of dementia patients. Dont know what that would consist of, but if you are in FL + caretaking, it is probably worth checking out. the number is 800 963 5337
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Sundowners and delusions?
This is my first post here, and a bit embarrassing and frustrating. My DH has alz, and white matter disease—recently diagnosed. For the past year he has been getting up in the middle of the night claiming I disrupt his sleep by moaning and rolling around. This is NOT happening. I have recorded sleep cycles to show him this…
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Advice on individual refusing to come inside
I work with a man who has dementia. Yesterday he insisted we go outside for ice cream. He refused to check his wallet with his phone (GPS tracking) and wallet for money. Then he went outside and refused to put on his jacket. I had to call his wife to get him to put on his jacket. He's middle stage, so I didn't feel safe…
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Question for the younger caregivers
I’m 51 caring for 80 year old spouse. This is a question for people like me who have given up work to be full time care givers. How do you plan for your future? What steps have you taken to stay active and engaged mentally, physically, creatively, socially, and career-wise? What are your plans for returning to paid work…
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End Stage Alzheimers disease
Im new to this forum and am hoping to get some advice on how to proceed with my mother's care. She is currently in a MC unit near my home using a hoyer lift. She's totally bedridden and has pressure sores on her back. The Dr's are giving her pain meds but I think it's time for hospice care. She can no longer speak…
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What do I say?
Friends and family know what is going on with my DW, and have been very helpful and supportive. Periodically one of these dear people will say, “How is she doing?”. It’s hard for me to say “a little worse every day, it seems” even if that’s the truth. I would like a better answer, but haven’t come up with one. Any ideas?
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No One Is Prepared for Alzheimer's
"No One Is Prepared for Alzheimer’s" I just published an Amazon book (kindle ebook and paperback) which is my journal written over 5-6 years about caring for my husband through the full course of his Alzheimer’s journey. It is entitled: “No One Is Prepared for Alzheimer’s: One Family’s Story.” George died last May, oddly…
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POSITIVE BALANCE
When I was a caregiver, I was on a seesaw. One side was attending to the needs of those I cared for, and the other side was attending to my own needs. Both sides were important. Both sides needed attention. The aim was to keep the seesaw balanced so one side did not go crashing to the ground. Perhaps looking back, I…
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Important (and classic) free book - Understanding the Dementia Experience