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caring for sister (parents have passed on)
I live in Cal 6 months and NY 6 months. My sister is early/mid stage Alz.2 hours from me in NY. When I'm in NY, she stays with me one week a month. She is 73 and has lived alone her whole life. She is resisting help but I know her Alz is progressing and she can no longer follow a recipe to make meals. Worse, she just…
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New to both parents with cognitive decline - sole caregiver
I really don’t know where to start. Maybe with my father. Around 2018 (age 63) he said he was diagnosed with organic dementia by a VA specialist. He suffers from confusion at times, word finding issues, incorrect word substitution, anger/lashing out and more. He can function normally most days. He is in denial of his…
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AS (1 bedroom apt vs studio apt)
Hi Wonderful Community- My husband is wondering if anyone has had this experience: Your LO lived in a 1+bedroom apt. in AL/SL and then they moved to a studio apt as the disease progressed. If so, did they like the studio better?
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Help with other family members
I am a paid caregiver for my mil. My husband have moved in with her during to her wandering. Every once and a while her daughter (POA) and her daughter will show up and "try to help". Unfortunately they go about it all wrong they argue with her force her to do things she don't want to do and strip away any dignity she…
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Anosognosia and a person's right to contribute and know what's going on
My LO's depressed and sad about leaving her home soon and many other things. She wants to move near her family and I feel that's what would be best for her. They will visit her and be with her. Currently the plan is memory cate 1000's of milea from them, near her DPOA. Her DPOA carrs and wants her safe and nearby. My LO…
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Hallucinations
My mother’s condition has suddenly, sharply declined. She is dx with Parkinson’s but has been having hallucinations sine before the Parkinson’s dx so doc thinks it might actually be Lewy Body Dementia. The doctor prescribed a new med for hallucinations but my mom thought it was a sleeping pill and didn’t take it but three…
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MIL taking advantage now that FIL can no longer control spending, spent $19k on clothes last year
My FIL has mid stage dementia and my MIL has a long history of substance abuse and untreated mental health issues. She's been better since they moved to their retirement community but she still has her moments. We've been taking over the finances. The FIL long ago determined that he'd never have dementia and would never…
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A rock and a hard place with in-laws
Good morning everyone. We have felt so lucky to have found this site and this group of support. My wife and I have been together almost 22 years and I have been part of her family for the same amount of time. After losing my own father to cancer just less than 2 years into our relationship, her parents have always been…
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Don't Know what to do
My mom has had Dementia for a few years now and it is overwhelming at times especially when she says things like I (her daughter) or my aunt (her sister) are trying to harm her when that is not true. She doesn't even remember my name or that I am her daughter but I know it is just the disease but it still affects me at…
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What exactly is “sun downing”?
And do I need to do anything differently if my MIL is now showing sundowners syndrome? MIL lives with us and was diagnosed with middle mixed (Alzheimer’s/vascular) in Feb 2023. Although she scored poorly on the processing parts of the neuropsych exam, she eats, showers and changes clothes without assistance. I prepare her…
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Argument
I'm so upset. I visited my mom and dad today and was filling my dad's med box when I found out my mom has been doing it herself and gave him the wrong dose. I addressed that to my mom and she's confused about the right meds for dad. We had a verbal altercation and told me to get out. So I did. My dad has dementia and can't…
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Prednisone for PWD
Please help! I read online that one of the medications that people with dementia should avoid is steroids. It says online that steroids can make the dementia worse or progress faster. Today, however, my mom's doctor wanted to prescribe 40 MG of Prednisone for an alleged viral upper respiratory virus. (Rhinovirus/…
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Dad lacks motivation or interest
Hello there, Our Dad is 95. Lost his wife three years ago. Grieved terribly!! He's now in full blown dementia. He is just so without any of his old spark or interest. He has been in care for 9 months now. Has anyone else seen this lack of interest? Do anti-depressants help? Thanks,
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Can someone who doesn't walk anymore get blisters on their feet?
My mom who has advanced dementia and needs 24/7 care is in a small nearby board and care facility (she's been there 3 months now). The staff claims that she had blisters on her feet from her shoes and gave her some hand-me-down slippers from another resident. My mom is in a wheelchair all day. How did she get blisters on…
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I goofed
Hello! My parents are in assisted living due to dementia and/or Alzheimer's, and I am the main one responsible for them. I am thankful that I can do what I do, but I am 70 years old, and sometimes I become exhausted, which has happened this past month. It is also why they are in assisted living rather than in my home. I…
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How to get sleep for work the next day when your dad won't sleep and roams your house
My dad moved in with us and is to the point in his dementia where he roams at night and does not want to go back to bed. We have tried keeping him awake during the day as I can work from home, tried natural remedies such as melatonin, regular routines during the day and night, explaining why he needs to at least stay in…
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Bible Verse to Life You Up 12/23/23
Great Verses About the Messiah Isaiah 9:6-7 New International Version 6 For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. 7 Of the greatness of his government and peace there will be no…
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wants to go home...again...
I know I've written about this before...but we are at our wits' end. Mom thinks we live in an identical house and spend time together in one another's houses, but needs to go home at least once or twice a week. we've tried diversion and making an excuse why we can't do it right then, but she doesn't let it go. she then…
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Agression & Frustration
Hello, I would like to receive information on what to do in cases when my uncle who has Alzheimer's becomes aggressive or frustrated with her. My Aunt does not have the financial resources to place my Uncle in senior care. Some places here in Houston have wanted to charge her around $7,000 a month for his placement and…
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Live Chat
Is there a live chat room here? It would be nice to talk to others in real time. Thanks
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Resentment
Does anyone else feel deep deep resentment toward their LO? My mom is in memory care declining fast. They now suspect vascular dementia and NPH. She refused surgery that may have helped her. I saw her yesterday, today I’m at work and she’s calling 20 times saying she is desperate and has no way to get home. I call the…
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How to deal with mean and hurtful behavior
Mom was diagnosed with vascular dementia. Issues with executive function. The bran atrophy is in the part that controls emotions. On top of that she has been prescribed oxycodene for arthritis. i am struggling with how to properly handle her when she has temper tantrums. Shes verbally abusive to my dad and I. He takes the…
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Just starting this journey
My mom is dealing with memory loss and heading toward dementia/Alzheimer’s. We found an aneurysm and hoped that would help… but her memory is getting worse, but what I see most is she is so easily agitated and frustrated. She can’t remember talking to me or telling me something 5 minutes ago. Getting in a car she is…
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Seeking some solace and advice
Hello, my sister and I are in the proverbial weeds with our 79 year old Mom who has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. She has been showing signs of short term memory loss for the last few years and this past 6 months it has noticeably deteriorated. We have been at the mercy of a very slow diagnosis but finally had…
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Bye kitty
I tried to write this post yesterday. Only typed the title and then just lost it. Big ugly cry. Trying again now. I mentioned a while back that my mom had a cat in AL, and that I was trying to negotiate with the facility director to let the cat stay with her after a transfer to MC. Most who commented here recommended that…
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Elderly Care for Dad
Hello, My Dad is 97 yo and has been living in a progressive care community for the past 15+ years. After my Mom passed from VD in 2015, Dad made it very clear he did not want to ever have to go to AL our LTC but wanted aides to come to his home to assist if needed. Roll forward 7 years and here we are in full-blown…
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Siblings in denial
Hello all, My two parents with brain change are my father in law, and my mother. We live in Pennsylvania temporarily in my mother and father in law's house. Mom passed away three and 1/2 years ago. Dad is in memory care. We live here because my husband is closing Dad's business. My husband's siblings (5) are in a mixed…
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Starting palliative care for my dad. And some ramblings
My dad is 85 & has lived with us since March 2020-ironically he had a minor stroke right before Covid took over. Dad has had dementia for at least 6 years now. He also has balance issues and was diagnosed with Parkinson’s last year. Since August we’ve had 8 falls where he actually hit the floor and several close calls. He…
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dementia mom & upcoming wedding
My mom recently is not recognizing me. So far, she knows my kids. But my daughter is getting married next year. She's realized that mom may not be able to attend her wedding, or may not know her, which is very sad. Her & my mom have always been close. I find it heartbreaking. Mom also does not like to be in a big group of…
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Mamma and her diaper...
I am new here. My mom has brain damage from deprivation of oxygenated blood flow to the brain after her heart rhythm was too abnormal for too long. She also suffers multiple autoimmune diseases and has a strong family history of Alzheimer's disease. Since she is completely bedridden at home and unable to go out to…