-
Steps to take legally
Caring for DH. Have wills and standard forms. What do I do in case I pass first. dH unable to carry on. Legally should I change titles now, rewrite my will, move finances immediately to sons? Will currently states goes first to spouse, should i change that? Worried.
-
NIH funding update- the truth…
I saw a post on social media this week that there were cuts being made at the NIH. My husband died in August from Alzheimer's and I have been fighting cancer since 2017 so this worried me greatly. Also my daughter works for a major cancer hospital that receives funding for cancer research So I decided to look into it…
-
Bible Verse to Lift You Up 2/23/25
GOD’S GRACE AND DOING GOOD Ephesians 2:8-10 New International Version 8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast. 10 For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in…
-
Overwhelmed? It is the loved ones of those with Alzheimer's who bear the greatest burden.
It is the loved ones of those with Alzheimer's who bear the greatest burden, and often care for them at the expense of their own well-being. It is common for family members and loved ones to find themselves thrust into this nightmare completely unprepared and ill-equipped for it. Sadly, much will be damaged or completely…
-
Cooking doesn’t get much easier
Super Easy Mexican Chicken 1 can cheddar cheese soup 1 can cream of chicken soup 1 can chicken breast small or large can (I don’t see much difference) 1 can Rotel tomatoes 1 small can diced green chilis Flour tortillas About 4 oz. Mexican cheese Mix first 5 ingredients together Lightly spray PAM in 8X8 or 9X9 baking dish…
-
Your humor for the day...
I posted a few days ago a question about men's briefs and it was suggested that I purchase male "guards" as a way to combat the beginning urinary issues….several people answered, and then, today, we had this new turn of events. I thought folks might enjoy…. Well, a chuckle for those who answered my initial question…..DH…
-
Transition to MC Planning
We have had a really tough couple of weeks leading to a MC move decision. I am looking for insights from those who have done the MC placement. I think I have a fiblet that could work for the transition - I am not well, too fatigued and I have to go in for tests and likely TCU and the medical folks arranged for him to be at…
-
Are PWD capable of any kind of understanding of consequences?
My DH is probably in stage 5. Recently he has been accusing me of having a boyfriend and going out on dates when I am not visiting him. He is very crude in his description of what I am doing with this boyfriend, and does not believe any of my assurances that this is not true. I can't seem to get him off the subject and he…
-
From Maybe to Reality
This past week, I poured out my feelings of guilt about being impatient with my DH to our pastor. Ignore any lack of compassion for the caretaker here, I wasn't looking for that. The entireity (sp?) of his response was who was treating him, was it a local doctor and how I needed to take him into the nearest large city to…
-
Incontinent briefs
I ordered 3 pair of incontinent briefs for DH, trying to find an interim solution for the drips and dribbles. I am pleased with the quality but surprised by one thing…the width of the crotch. I wondered if anyone considered this: the crotch from edge to edge is over 6" wide, exactly between the legs. Surely that is going…
-
It’s Time to Get Help In the House
Hi Everyone- it’s time for me to begin to have some help here at the house. My wife will hate it but I can’t safely leave her alone anymore. Ugh! I have several options that I know of, and they go from high end to “not sure”. $48/hr to $15. Highly credentialed to more of a crap shoot (which this whole thing feels like no…
-
Bible Verse to Lift You Up 2/15/25
Caregivers, the rules I no longer allow me to post on each discussion, so each time I post, use the search option to look for my Bible Verse to Lift You Up for the Caregiver. Peace always. BE STRONG AND COURAGEOUS! Joshua 1:9 New International Version 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid;…
-
Looking to connect first time . New
Hi names Tom , caregiver for wife , she has Alzheimer little over 3 years , middle stage and struggling . We both are . Finally reaching out . I am turning 80 in May , this is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life . And saddest . Married 63 years , who would have guessed . Don't know what else say right now , but…
-
Scared and unsure
Iam so new to all this I apologize I just don’t know where to turn. My husband is showing signs of memory loss and it’s scary. I’ve got him to go to his pcp but I have no idea what is ahead. Iam having anxiety attacks and can’t seem to function well myself. This is a hell. I am just reaching out because I have no one to…
-
Thank you all!
In my last post, I told how DH had the car key. That night, he left the key in the car while he was packing to go home, again. He asked me if I had the key, I reminded him that he had it last, but I knew the key must be in the car if the doors were unlocked. So, I told him I would help him look and sat in the driver seat.…
-
New here and overwhelmed
Hello I am currently caring for my husband and am overwhelmed. The Doctor just confirmed he is in the early stages. Presented some approaches to dealing with this including the infusions. I shared this with my husband today and he didn't express much interest. Said it sounded like it wasn't safe and just not worth it. I am…
-
Not taking it well...
Hi, I am totally new to this...writing and my husband behavior. I also have a hard time with sharing about our life but my daughter told me...mom find some group for your self I can't help you. My husband developed sings of dementia last year in february which we didn't noticed right away. It has been getting slowly…
-
Car Keys
I have kept the car keys away from DH for several months now. Just now, he was verbally abusive and aggressive about the key fob that I had. He badgered and threatened until I gave them to him. I am so afraid he will drive off now. Though he just went to the garage and came back in. What do you do in these circumstances?
-
DH's friend is stirring up trouble...
This person thinks I'm imprisoning my DH by keeping him in memory care instead of moving him to AL or independent living or back home. He doesn't agree with my care plan for my DH. I responded by saying "he's my husband, not yours!" whether you agree with me or not. He says he's done some research and can challenge my…
-
Losing glasses in nursing facility
Thanking you all for your suggestions. I feel it is going to be a neverending battle. I thought of getting a strap to hold them on but don't know if that is a good idea. Compared to what everyone else is going through, this is nothing.
-
Losing glasses in nursing facility
My DH has been in a nursing facility for 3 weeks and he has broken and lost a pair of glasses. Unfortunately I didn't put his name on the second pair, so don't think there is a chance they will return. Any ideas besides putting his name on them. It is going to be an expensive if he keeps losing them.
-
Why caregivers go nuts
While waiting for his doctor’s appointment DH took a pamphlet off a table and read it intensely for 10 minutes. He then handed it to me to see if I would like to read it. I glanced at it and said it was interesting. It was written completely in Spanish. We don’t know Spanish. Hmmmm Last week DH lost his house keys. We…
-
Getting to the doctor
My wife has dementia. I took her to a neurologist and we both had brain MRI's. He scheduled both of us for a computer test and my wife refused to take it. I did. My tests were basically to try to get her there. She refuses to go to the neurologist and has not been diagnosed but it is obvious she is getting worse. Any…
-
Another Let Down
Just venting my frustration. We found a Dementia Support Coffee Group, held once a month at Brothers Leagues Club, held in one of their small meeting rooms, it has an attached kitchen and is on the ground floor surrounded by gardens and trees. Lovely. So each month we would go, meet up with people and their carers. Then we…
-
Excessive Sleeping and Managing Hydration & Nutrition
My wife is progressively sleeping longer and longer. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in 2020, but was afflicted before then. In January 2024 she was sleeping about 12 hours per night. In September we began logging her daily activities in a Day Planner and that has been very useful to allow our care team to communicate…
-
DH does not know w
-
From NYT: She's Trying to Stay Ahead of Alzheimer's...
Trigger Warning: This article discusses the euthanasia in the context of dementia and capacity to make that decision. https://www.nytimes.com/2025/02/16/health/assisted-death-alzheimers-netherlands.html?unlocked_article_code=1.xU4.tbXQ.v-oE6OJf1pgh&smid=url-share
-
underwear question
I bought the first box of male guards for leaks and dribbles for DH. I am wondering (haven't opened the box yet), are these basically the same thing as pad for ladies but made in masculine color? Maybe I'll use up the old ones I have first, any reason why not? I had to buy a box of 52, so maybe I could take the m back?
-
Dermotologist: When to Stop
My DW had a small spot removed a couple of years ago. A tiny melanoma we caught early. Her father had a bunch of these taken off over the years and it got harder to manage as he went downhill with his dementia. He'd pick at the scabs and they would take forever to heal. Her other sister also has considerable melanoma…
-
Bible Verse to Lift You Up 2/8/25
THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD Psalm 23 Amplified Bible A Psalm of David. 23 The Lord is my Shepherd [to feed, to guide and to shield me], I shall not want. 2 He lets me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still and quiet waters. 3 He refreshes and restores my soul (life); He leads me in the paths of righteousness…