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Moving mom to memory care
Hi all. My 86 year old mom has level 6 Alzheimer's. We (my brother and I) can no longer care for her and we are moving her to a memory care facility. She is still lucid enough to say no, and I am asking for help of how to get her there without telling her where she is going. The facility suggested we say we are going away…
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Venting/Help
Hello all, I just joined this group and have been reading posts to try to figure out what is happening with my dad and how to handle it. His situation does not fit neatly into any diagnostic criteria from what I can tell. Sorry, this will be long. He is 85, my mom died about 10 years ago. I live a few miles away, my…
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Do I visit my mom in memory care even though she's angry?
My parents are both in memory care and my mom is in the mid stages of Alzheimers. She has had a sudden shift in personality and is now convinced that I've taken her money and won't see her. I visit her weekly but she thinks I've moved to Russia, divorced my husband and am being beaten. She is angry with me every time I…
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Mom
Hello everyone, I'm knew here. Where do I begin? Mom lives alone in her house, I'm an only child and I have a special needs adult child, who has mental health issues. Now that I got that out of the way. Mom was starting to lose a little bit of her memory before her fall last may. My mom is 78 yrs old with osteoporosis.…
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Not sure what’s happening - post hospitalization
I’m hoping for some insight from experienced members. MIL was hospitalized for two nights and was doing great. Good appetite, baseline clarity and baseline ambulatory. She had a long phone conversation with her daughter four days after discharge. That’s usual as they talk for hours once or twice a week. My SIL texted me…
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Aggression in dementia
Hello everyone I just found this group and was wondering if you guys can give me some pointers. My mother and grandmother just passed within the last year so my sister and I have became my grandfathers full time caregiver. I am 21 and my sister is 24 so we are pretty new at all of this. My grandfather has been getting very…
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POA
Hello, My Mom is refusing to sign POA documents. At this time, she has not paid her taxes for a few years and almost lost her house in another state. How do I proceed to petition a court for conservatorship? Do I need a lawyer? Thanks. I am an only child and my Mom has always been a Rock for all family members and friends-…
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Suggestions for clothing organization/ decreasing amount of clothing
My mother in law was just recently diagnosed with advanced Alzheimers and my husband and I are new to caregiving. My mother in law has A LOT of clothing. We recently went through clothes with her and got rid of a large amount but the amount she has is still very overwhelming to her and. She refuses to remove any more…
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Feeling guilty about selling her things, her house. I know I'm not the only one.
Hi everyone, I'm sure there are many of you who have gone through/are going through this and would love to hear from you. My mom was diagnosed with dementia (we don't know what type) about 4 months ago. We had to move her into a memory care facility. I am now at the point where I need to sell her house, and probably have…
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When do you know it’s time for memory care arrangements?
Can people share how/when you decided it was time?
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Any Online Support Groups
Hello. I am the primary person in charge of my mom’s care (long distance). She’s in a nursing home. I live out of the country and am wondering if there are any online support groups for those who provide lingo-distance care.
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Back Home
So, my LO finally left snowy WI for sunny SC. Her #1 desire was to be back in the sunshine. Sadly, WI was never the right choice for her. In fact, a year ago, when my brother said it was time for her to move from her home, she chose SC over WI. (I talked her into 'trying' WI) She referred to her time in WI as being to hell…
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Need advise on my 82 year old mom
My 82 year old mom was active, driving, cooking, shopping, living alone until June 2023 . She had a neurological stroke which left her with dementia. She is confused somewhat and has aphasia ( words are mixed make no sense) . I had to relocate and leave my home , job and adult children in another state to care for my mom .…
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POA
Hello, I have a POA for my mom we got it early this year before she progressed. Well two weeks ago, my mom was asked to stop driving and her diagnosis was confirmed. She’s refusing to stop driving and argues she only drives short distances. How liable am I if she continues to drive? I don’t want to go to the extreme of…
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Hallucinations
My mom keeps having these hallucinations about someone who stole an inheritance that supposedly my father left ( he has been dead for 19 years now and left us nothing ) , she is insisting I call the police or get a lawyer to help find this man to get him apprehended , I just don't know how to respond to her , don't want to…
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Just sharing a moment of epiphany
So yesterday was a particularly frustrating morning with Mom. Angry about money and lying people, and all sort of nasty comments. I was having a very hard time keeping my compassion and my Ms Dementia glasses weren’t working! decided I needed to escape and went down to the beach to walk around and let tranquillity envelope…
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Siblings not on the same page
UPDATE: I had a “come to Jesus” moment last week when all 6 kids got the stomach flu, and I realized that I don’t have to do it all. I need to stop resisting the path that is easier in front of me and let Jesus (and my siblings) take the wheel. We are transitioning him to an AL out of state, since there is more family…
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Dad is obsessing over finding out cost of nursing care. What do I tell him?
My dad is in a nursing home and is lucid and conversational sometimes. He has lived a very frugal life and has always been obsessed with how much things cost. Lately he has been obsessed with how much it costs to stay that the nursing home and is determined to get to the bank to see what checks have been written and how…
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Moving to a Memory Care Community
Does anyone have suggestions on how to talk to your parent about moving to a memory care community? I’m trying to find the words that my Dad would understand. He’s not able to rationalize anymore and has never liked change.
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A moment of humor ...
Yesterday while visiting mom in MC, I offered her a Glucerna shake (nutrition supplement for diabetics). She looked at it as if it was the first one she'd seen, though she has them frequently. She drank some and set it aside. After a while, I pointed to it and asked if she wanted to finish it. She picked it up and started…
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Fabrication of stories
Does anyone else have a LO that fabricates stories? My mom will say people say things to her that just doesn't make sense and seem unrealistic. If so, how do you respond to a story that you know is fabricated and untrue but they believe it to be true.
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Just reaching out to check in
Hello all, I haven't been on this forum in several months. I feel like I have been on autopilot and just trying to get through the days. I don't have a specific question here really, just wanted to reach out to connect with others who are going through the same thing in the hopes that I will feel less alone. About me: mom…
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Driving/anger
First time posting . Our mom is in AL with dementia that they feel is Alz since last fall as a result of living alone for past 2 years since dad passed. She has very frequent utis and delusions. The car and home were sold legally ( POA) . My mom has always been a bit sassy but the anger since we told her the car was sold…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 4/9/24
GOOD FRUIT Galatians 5:22-23 New International Version “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” THINK ABOUT THIS: What fruit do you need the most help with? Why do you think this one is more difficult?…
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Family and friends offering unsolicited advice
Recently my brother and I placed my dad in LTC, and felt that this was the best decision for his stage and getting the proper care that he needed. However, we’ve had friends and family question our decision and offer their unsolicited advice on how best to care for him. How have you handled situations like this?
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Father caring for mother
Is anyone like me in a situation in which their father is caring for their mother with Alzheimer's? I am the only daughter (one sibling is deceased, the other is not physically well and not emotionally suited to helping the way that I do). My father, in his 80s, is amazing in many ways as a caregiver (especially in his…
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The ups and downs of family dynamics
Wowow , where do I start , for one I am grateful for this forum/service for us sandwich generation families we are going through this storm (analogy ofcourse ) for my situation mom was diagnosed 6-8 months ago , but with not a clear diagnosis , but nevertheless things have become like a storm gathering steam , that's how…
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Caring for father in mid-stage Alzheimer's
Hello, I am new to this discussion board. I am one of a few people caring for my father in mid-stage Alzheimer's. One of the biggest challenges we have is changing his depends and getting him to shower. He becomes angry and won't change or take a shower. Sometimes it's 2-3 weeks between showers. I am so afraid for his…
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Granddaughter dealing with Husbands Grandmother help
New to this site and not sure anyone can help or if I'm in the right place. Grand daughter (GD)and husband bought his Grandmothers home 4 years ago as it was going to be foreclosed on. They let her stay and live with them in the home, she was supposed to inherit he ex's home after he recently died, and move to that home…
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Incontinence - sign of last stage?
My mom has started pooping her pants and not even realizing it happened. She has been mostly Urine incontinent for year but this poop thing is beyond my capabilities as caregiver. She had a fall last week and still in pain even though no fracture, but she doesn't want to be out of bed for more than a few minutes and won't…