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Sleep issues
I am the caregiver along with my sister for our 101 year old father. His dementia has gotten worse since a recent 3 week hospital stay. He is home now but dependent on my sister and me for everything, He is obsessed with going to the bathroom multiple times a day, most of the times he doesn't go at all. Since he needs help…
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The 'Jekyll and Hyde' thing.
Who is she going to be today? Yesterday she was sweet, a little unsteady, and afraid of losing friends and being alone. Yesterday she needed hugs and reassurance, and a major clean-up twice. She woke up mean. Doesn't want help, or to be told what to do, or anything. Informs me that I am mean and awful. Pacing around, the…
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From an old post - notice the date
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Questions about EEG
My DH had an EEG a couple days ago and the results are shown in his portal online but haven’t heard from the neurologist yet. He is probably late stage 6.and still trying to determine if ALZ or FTD. The results on the portal show the impression is “normal” and “This is a normal EEG capturing wakefulness. No…
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Once again
In December 1998 when one of our sons died, I cried. I don't remember crying before that. The next time I cried was 2 weeks ago when I was getting her things ready to take to MC. Today was almost perfect weather wise. Mid 70s, mild breeze, partly/mostly sunny. We have a small patch of woods on the west side of the house,…
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Happy Father's Day(1)
Sending warmest wishes for a Happy Father's Day to all fathers and all those who have served as father's to children . . . you have given much to children's futures with one of the two most important figures in a child's life . . . (the other being Mother.) J.
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Feel so guilty
I visit my husband 2-3 hours every day but it’s becoming difficult for me to keep it up. DH is at early stage 6 Alzheimer’s but had a paralyzing stroke so now he is in the best (i.e., most expensive) facility in town. When I visit him, I face two hours of whining and toilet aromas. He is doubly incontinent now and is…
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Father’s Day Wishes
*apologies for cross-posting Wishing all you amazing caregiver fathers and father figures a good day. Also sending hugs to those for whom this is the first heavenly or MC Father’s day for your LO. May you find some happy moments today. Thinking of you.
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Bad / Scary Night
We live in New Mexico and last night we received the first rain in 78 days which is a blessing. The past week I have been battling a terrible cough (not Covid) and even went to Urgent Care to get something to help because I've been coughing all night long and am exhausted. I've been having DH sleep in the guest room so my…
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Just a caution if LO is going to MC
We found a mini fridge with a small freezer at Best Buy that we thought might be good for my wife. She likes her cokes, and there's no reason for her not to have them at this stage in her life. So we took a few cans up there for her. The next day one of our daughters went to visit her mother. When she looked in the…
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44 years today
It's another anniversary. We had multiple power outages yesterday and I set my clock ahead by mistake. So I got up an hour earlier this morning. I almost went back to bed but instead I started my day with prayer as always,then I did the checking account,made hummy juice,watered the outside flowers,,ect. I am glad I did, dw…
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Key Largo
We were listening to music when the song "Key Largo" came on, a song about lost love. When the lyric came "Honey, can't you remember" I nearly broke down, the song suddenly had a new meaning.
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News(1)
Dear all, I still come here sometimes to have news from you. I miss you, but it also saddens me to read how most of you struggle. You are very courageous and I admire you. The beginning of May has been very complicated but I held on. 2 weeks after my visit and the medication change, things began to improve. There is no…
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Neurologist or Psychiatrist
What is the recommended health professional for a 75-year-old Alzheimers patient who has no underlying health issues. Is it appropriate to consult with just a neurologist, just a psychiatrist or both? What do each of them offer in terms of appropriate care for the patient who is a resident of a memory care unit at a CCRC.
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Should we tell our friends?
My husband is in the early stages of ALZ and we have told our grown kids and our brothers and sisters about the diagnosis. And we also told two of our couple best friends. Our kids don't want us to tell anyone else because they feel people will treat him differently. But I want to tell our close neighbors and friends. I…
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LO in denial; Adult children unwilling to hel[p
My wife refuses to accept she has any mental issues. Blames me, our adult children, the doctors, etc. for thinking she does. My adult children refuse to help, practicing tough love on me to make me put my LO back in a memory care faciltiy, even though her doctor there says she dows not need to be there.
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An idea about 'death by a thousand cuts'
You are a caregiver for a person with a brain disease. They do unpredictable and often careless or destructive things. Every broken dish, torn photograph, pee puddle, destroyed object.....every one was another nick. Another negative reaction I had to catch before I said a wrong thing, or gave a rebuke to a mental patient…
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Potential future placement made harder….
There are peculiar upsides to AD progression. Among them, my DW is now long past asking to ‘go home.’ Last night, out of the blue, DW said, “I love it here.” I said, “that’s great,” and asked her why. She replied, “There are people here I love and enjoy.” Then, the light bulb flickered and went out. I asked her who she was…
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Gig Harbor
Thinking about you today, I think this is it? Please let us know how it goes when you can.
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Finally, a win
Got this this morning. I had a tough weekend, but i can take the separation as long as I know she's okay: Good morning! Great news! S. has participated in EVERY activity offered on Sunday and Monday! Yesterday she was shouting out the answers for trivia, enjoying the afternoon movie and singing along to some songs! Ariel…
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saw neuro- are these tests really helpful?
We saw a neurologist last week. This is the first time I actually got my husband to go- although we are at least 4 years into this journey. He has said ok, then changed his mind when it close to the appointment. The doc put a diagnosis of Alzheimers on his chart. But is that really possible without any testing? And the…
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Another win today!
One of our daughters and one of our sons went up to see their mother this morning. They said when they got there, she was in the activity room playing Uno!! It seems like I'm having a few wins lately. I'm a little surprised that she is interacting with other people. But she wants to know why I haven't been up there to see…
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Update after 9 months in MCF
I am reading so many posts recently about placement; considering it, planning it, or having done it. We went through that last September, and maybe our experience will be comforting to those who are dealing with it now. I placed my wife in MC for a respite one week before I had minor surgery. I had researched local…
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Abc 123
I was thinking of you and wondering how you are. Hope you are doing okay. Sure miss you.
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How to pay for caregiving at home
Hello. This is my first post on this site. I am running out of money to care for my husband who is at home with me. Long story short: We live in MD and are married. The state of MD Medicaid rules require me to deplete my retirement before my husband can be eligible for Medicaid. I am only 52, so I cannot tap into my…
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Dental procedures for PWD
I see this issue raised here, and just wanted to share my experience of the last week..: My DH with Alzheimer’s was crying in pain with “toothache.” Rx painkillers no help. Went to dentist, who said it was indeed very bad and tooth must come out. Oral surgeon, ditto. Surgeon specializes in dementias and special needs; the…
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Had to share this with you
tinyurl.com/muwepp87 Sorry I couldn't make a live link, but it's worth copying and pasting. EDIT: I have it working. Just scroll down.
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cell phone provider?
Has anyone tried or uses Consumer Cellular as a cellphone provider. If so is it good or bad? I'm currently with AT&T and our monthly bill just went up to the point I'm fed up. I'm a AARP member and they are always advertising it. I've got to find another provider here in OK. Please let me know any suggestions.
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bladder and bowel incontinence
My wife is on memantine and Rivastigmine. She was on namenda and then donepezil before going on Rivastigmine. Reason for changes was diaherra. Dr. said most likely caused by med, so he changed it and after a year changed it again. She also takes 1/2 a trazadone sleeping pill nightly and that could also cause bowel issues…
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Research study about caregiver grief
For those of you who like to read academic studies, this one about recognizing and managing caregiver grief relates to what most of us in this forum are experiencing. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/1533317515602085