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Is it too early?
My dh has EOD. His father did and stayed at home until he could no longer eat. He died 1 month after entering memory care. They lived in another state. In my mind I have always expected to keep him home until he got to the stage of being incontinent. He is 13” taller and I could not physically take care of him. However…
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Coping with grief and loss
https://vimeo.com/421756670 An excellent webinar on the experience of grief and loss of caregivers as a loved ones disease progresses. It gave me insight into my emotional state and I thought it well worth sharing. There are other good resources at the Ontario Caregivers website.
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The perils of AD and work Zoom
Some days you can’t win for trying. I start my work day with a Zoom meeting with about 20 colleagues. I’m generally in listen-only mode, so I attend without starting video or audio. And usually DW is still in bed when the meeting occurs. Yesterday, however, she woke and was ready to rise earlier than usual. So I was…
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Finding out that handling the impossible, is possible....
In all the scenarios over the years I could imagine I'd find myself, it was never what I'm doing now ... 68 years old, out of shape, dealing with Crohn's/IBS attacks and an FTD husband, single-handedly clearing out my dad's independent living apartment and completing his financial affairs with the retirement complex; doing…
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Alone(4)
The last day I saw DW in person was March 5. 2020 In truth she had no idea who I was even then. It had been a year since she showed any recognition of me or the children or grandchildren. I fell in love with her in 1971. The memory of her love and life and laughter keep me going. But I admit it tears my guts to see her on…
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PWD reaction to Zoom calls
Lately, DW has had extremely negative behavior when I am on a video chat or even on the phone. Last night I was on a video chat with my brothers, and DW started to shake and whimper and try to get my attention. She was very agitated. I muted about every 5 minutes to calm her down, but she just would not get calm. This…
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Doc put him on Seroquel for aggressive behavior
My DH had a second day of aggression (two weeks apart) where he defies everything we try to get him to do or not do. He constantly wants to go home to Fowler, KS where he was born and raised on a big wheat farm, but nobody is there anymore. In defiance, he jumped into our pickup truck and left on Sunday. My son and I…
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DW going into rages
As my DW's Alzheimer's has progressed (late mid stage) we have seen more and more angry rages. At first she would just get upset and it would pass after a little while. The first serious one was also my first experience with sundowners as we when out before dark but were returning home after dark and she became…
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New to the Message Board Just need to vent
Good evening everyone, I am a caregiver for my husband who is 76 years old and was diagnosed in 2016 with late onset Alzheimer's. Like many of you, I have a similar story of how things have been for me. My husband and I have always been the ones who have taken care of all our family members who were sick or had any kind of…
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What about God
From a former unbeliever.Well HE doesn't heal Alzheimer's but He gives us peace. I said God help me stop drinking after 35 years of excess. He did in one night before I believed, went to church or read the Bible. The next year my wife was diagnosed with Alzheimer's at age 52 and I didn't think much of God. I had so much…
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Sedation dentist needed
My wife is in need of dental care. She has advanced dementia, is nonverbal and cannot follow instructions. She will need sedation for the examination and work, but the sedation dentists with whom I have spoken say they need to examine her before accepting her as a patient.They won't sedate her for the exam. A catch-22. Has…
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O.T. This is our town
This is a pretty nice article on our town. If you get a "Log in" screen, just close it. You should be able to see it. https://www.nwitimes.com/business/local/watch-now-eclectic-unique-shops-make-downtown-griffith-a-vibrant-destination/article_ae90d083-e35d-5215-97a5-c804d5e825f5.html
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Just need to talk to my friends (138)
Hi, Thought I'd begin a new part of the thread because I waited and waited and just couldn't get on - don't know if it's our thread or what. Judith - frustration is the best word I can think of to express my feelings. You get something started and it falls through - so, frustration. So, Johnson & Johnson's vaccine is…
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I'd like cheese with my whine please.
OMG this is soo hard. I think he is in pain and all I can do is drug him into oblivion. He is very agitated so, I'm giving him Morphine , and Lorazapam (for aggitation and Haladol for halucinations. Up till now we have struggled to get to the toilet and fight to get the depends down and me wishing it was easier to get…
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Does expressive language decline before receptive language?
DW was diagnosed three and one-half years ago. Recently her expressive language ability has declined noticeably, but her receptive language seems not to has declined as rapidly or as much. Curious if others’ LO’s have had same experience.
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What's it really like?
I got a text from one of our daughters. Here is part of what she said: "I had a bad dream last week that I was walking and didn't know where I was and it was dark..I got up to go to the bathroom (for real) and I think I was still dreaming. I couldn't find the bathroom and I was looking in other doors. I was so confused and…
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O.T. Does anyone use Google Photos?
I have a ton of pics on there, but they're all blurry now. Just wondered if others were affected like that.
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Moving experiences?
Have any of you moved with your DW/DH? I am interested in hearing from others how a move went. We are considering a move to a continuing care community that would allow DW and me to live independently as long as possible but then for her to move to memory care and nursing care when the time for each comes. I believe this…
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Reaching the End
My DW of 42 years passed Monday from EO. She just forgot how to swallow she had been bed bound for a few months and she was so confused about everything. She passed with her children and husband at her side at home. While the journey was sometimes hard she was still happy until the last few weeks. Gone too soon, yes but…
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jerry's story
He was born in 1946 in Pennsylvania to a polish mother and and an Italian father. He had a big sister Darlene and many aunts, uncles and cousins.Thjey moved to California (Reseda) around 56 and lived an all american suburban lifestyle. He wasn't great in school because no one realized he had terrible vision.It led him to…
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One day of the life of a caregiver
As usual DH was wet this morning. To the bathroom to change clothes. Bathroom has to be 75 degrees or warmer to keep him calm. Sweating by the time I undress him. Finished the shower. Got him dressed, sometimes he is like an octopus to dress arms and legs moving every where but where they need to go. Kitchen table for…
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Doctor, Dentist, and Bank...Oh My!
In The last two weeks, DH has had a dermatology appointment, a dental emergency, and we needed to go to the bank yesterday. DH dislikes doctors and taking him for an appointment is always stressful. From the moment we arrived at the dermatologist's office he complained loudly...Is there a doctor here? If they're so busy,…
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In case your interested.
I don't recall anyone talking about it, but I may be wrong. There is a magazine called Alzheimers Today, comes out 4 times a year and it's free. Has some good articles. Alzheimer's Foundation of America | Alzheimer’s TODAY Magazine https://alzfdn.org/media-center/alzheimerstoday
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Top caregiver tips
Here is a video of really good tips. Watch it all the way through, so you don't miss anything. There are links to the full videos if you scroll down below the video. This is worth watching. There are a few ads that you can skip. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mcei7IGu6xQ&feature=youtu.be
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when I have a bad reaction, DH has a more intense bad reaction
I should know better by now. In science I learned that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. In our home there seems to be the law of caregiving that when I react badly to DH, he has a more intense and more stubborn bad reaction to me. DH has severely painful hemorrhoids. He has been a grouch. It has…
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How do you determine when a pain or discomfort is real
My DH has been hyper sensitive to any discomfort He has never been like this and has had cardiac pain and DPT in his legs causing great pain in the past. He told me he had chest pains so I took him to ER. When getting there he starts singing and totally jovial as they check him in and denied chest pain. EKG fine Last night…
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A copied post from Polyanna_4good
new to the forum and absolutely lost. Mom with dementia and very violent-has stabbed people with scissors, beat my father with Parkinson’s with a brass headed cane leaving him In the Hospital and still her caregiver will not provider orders for memory care. I feel this is so irresponsible-but she says it is up to my mother…
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Failed the “dry January” test
Hello all, New Year’s resolution was to stop my nightly wine consumption. I’ve failed miserably. DH is fairly stable and I am learning to deal with his repeated questions and toilet duties. Kudos to the poop club! Guess I’m feeling down about what’s going on in our country. At any rate, my mind set is to live for today and…
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another new issue...size really does seem to matter
I encountered my first issue where my smaller stature and my DH larger stature really hit home. I can no longer control DH, the paranoid delusions have really taken hold the last two days. What he thinks he is capable of doing and what he can actually do are so different, added by the fact that he thinks we are stealing…
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Tremors(1)
I am new to this forum. Has anyone experienced hand and arm tremors with late stage dementia?