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Alternative to Using the term Depends
My DH was diagnosed with EOAD in September 2019. At that time, getting on to this website was a nightmare especially if he was in the same room. I believe it's because he was in denial. I would only get on after I had gotten him safely into bed. But to be perfectly honest with everyone on this site, I too was in denial to…
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2nd opinion(1)
Have an apt tmrw with our 2nd neurologist for DH. First neuro diagnosed w/o any neurocognition testing. You only get 15 mins with him. When I asked about Exelon patch he said that’s for patients who can’t remember their meds. Diagnosis dementia with behavioral. He has a lot of Parkinson’s symptoms but neuro could tell by…
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A roller coaster of emotions hit me like a train
It's just after 9 am here in the Texas Hill Country. I've been out of bed about three hours now. I've already had a wide range of emotions and feelings. * Frustration - because my DH thinks he can do things independently but he cannot. As a result, I have quite a few messes to clean up. * Anger - at myself for getting…
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I hired a new aid - and other progress this month
My partner was in his family last week. Unfortunately I had to work and couldn’t rest as I would have needed. His return at home is hard for me. It's hard to go back to the routines I don't find pleasant (supervise the shower, the dressing...), to have to watch over everything. It’s more and more hard. During this…
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Impossible
My husband is in his second memory care home. He’s broken window and locks at least three times at his newest home. He barrages me with sad, angry, pitiful, manipulative emails. He cut himself tonight on a shard of glass. I awoke just now after an hour’s sleep gasping for breath. His Alzheimer’s of twelve years is killing…
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Anger(6)
I'm fairly new to the forum and I appriciate everything people say here. There are so many things I'd like to address but for me today is the issue of anger. My husband and I have been together for over 20 years after both of us came off of bad relationships. He is 67 and I am 64 years old and work from home. We seldom…
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feeling good after a good deed
The other day, walking home from the bank, I spotted something in the road. A purse, partially buried in the snow. A quick peek revealed a COVID vaccine card for an 82 year old woman. The rest of the way home I was thinking, how am I going to find this woman? I don't think she'll be active on social media....Opening the…
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Peaceful Passing
My DH passed away peacefully last week. He was on hospice for a week. Two weeks before he died he stopped walking. Talking was hard. Stopped eating a week before death. He did not have pneumonia or a stroke. Breathing was erratic and blood pressure was low. Heart was strong to start with. The Lord carried him home February…
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O.T. does anyone else use a chromebook?
If you do, here's a link to a useful video on new features. 3 Hidden Features In Chrome OS 88 You Can Try Right Now I tried them. Very useful.
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HOW TO CHOOSE CARE FACILITY AND XLNT RESOURCE WHAT TO DO DAY OF ADMISSION AND AFTER
The Illinois information is long and truly excellent. It is a literal bible of what to do on the day of admission to a care facility and thereafter, with all the whys, and hows, and so much more. https://www.kiplinger.com/article/retirement/T027-C000-S004-how-to-choose-a-memory-care-unit.html Consumer Guides |…
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late stage 7(1)
I actually get a little jealous of anyone who describes their spouse as using actual words or doing ANYTHING. Or developed symptoms after age 60. According to my notes the last time DW used actual words was August of 2018. She lost all recognition of me by January 2019. She likes very nice personal caretaker who sees her…
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If you have someone else who can persuade compliance
My wife never wants to bathe. And this morning she refused her pills, regardless of my proven tactics. But we have a daughter who can persuade her to do what needs to be done. She calls my wife every other day to remind her to shower. No problem there. This morning I called her, and told her her mother would not take her…
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My first ever post
My DH was diagnosed 3 years ago. He is 10 years older than me. He is retired and I still work, and need to work right now as his retirement only brings SS to the household income. I am his "whipping post". If I do or say one thing, he expected it to be the other way. His short term memory is sooooo bad and he's getting…
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Lobster bib
This may be old news to many of you but I was getting tired of DH dropping food on his clothes and the floor so I ordered extra large adult bibs on Amazon. They are terry cloth and very effective. I didn’t want him to feel embarrassed so I told him it was a bib for eating lobster which we would have later. He said “ok” and…
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valadation/a good read
https://www.alzheimers.net/2013-11-07-validation-method-for-alzheimers
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Sold DH Car
Two days ago we sold DH car. It was only 4 years old and the dealership gave us a very fair price for it. He has not really driven it since retiring in July. He was told in December not to drive anymore after his neuro psychological test. I am in shock that he listened as he was always driving somewhere. He willingly went…
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Mixed Emotions
Its been a while since I posted...DW has been somewhat rapidly declining...We have had Hospice home care for about 6 weeks now...DW condition is basically stopped eating..1/4 of a bowl of cereal in the morning & a yogurt for supper..1-2 bottles of Ensure during the course of the day...all coached & hand fed by me...I can…
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Reminiscing during the ice storm
Today is the first day I have been able to access the internet since the ice storm started a week ago. We fared better than many in Texas. We lost power early on, but it came back on the following day. The heater broke and we were without heat for two days until I was able to have it repaired. We are still under a boil…
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I don't feel like a man anymore
My DH was diagnosed with AD May 2018. He has been very different this week. Yesterday he said I was ruining his credit because I don't charge alot on his credit card. We have bills deducted from that credit card every month and his credit is great because it's paid every month on time. He did later apologize and I had to…
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Missing Him(1)
I spend close to three hours a day with my DH in a wonderful Advanced Care Facility. He is in late 6 or beginning of stage 7. He is non verbal so I have no way of knowing what he is thinking. He kept looking at me today as if he wanted to say something. It is getting harder for me to leave when it is time to go. I go home…
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Leaving water on
Anyone have problem with lo leaving on water. DH has done so for last couple of months sometime he tells me sometimes not. Now going it daily. It’s night time I’m worried about I make sure sinks clear hot water off in main bathroom that he uses at night. Any suggestions?
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still working?
Hi all, I am interested in hearing about the experience of having your spouse/partner diagnosed while they were still working. I am trying to support my spouse through this, but he's not able to make very good decisions and I'm not really comfortable trying to deal with his job. Diane
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Mars Rover touchdown today
Slightly off topic, but for those of us looking for an exciting escape from the depressing reality we face, below is a link to the NASA website which has great information on the Mars Rover vehicle which is set to touch down on Mars this afternoon at around 1 PM Pacific time. There is a link to watch online starting about…
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Maryland in the US
Are there many here from Maryland. If so, what do you see are the issues with the state related to dementia? What do they do good or need improvement? Thanks
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2 Months
Exactly 2 months ago at 8:42 PM my DW, companion, best friend, and lover took her last breath in my arms. We grew up together as we met when she was 15 and I 16. We were always referred to as the human pretzel as we always loved being entangled in some way or another. She didn't quite make it to her 65th birthday because…
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hygiene solution, for now
DH has been letting his hygiene slide. Fewer clothes (especially undies) in the laundry. Rarely showers. So, on Valentine's day, I gave him a "spa day." I sold it hard all day. Spa Day! Spa Day! Do you want your spa this morning or this evening? Before or after dinner? We have a large Jacuzzi tub, so I filled it with…
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Dementia mimicing Bipolar disorder?
57 yo hubby hasn't been diagnosed with MCI or dementia but has signs that lead me to believe that it is beginning. He is becoming more and more grandiose, hurried and almost desperate in his plans and ideas. He is terrified of dying and "I want to be known in this community." I would describe it as almost "manic" He…
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Pretty good memoir in the February 1 New Yorker
The widower of a woman with Parkinson's described his effort to care for her at home as her hallucinations and dementia progressed. When their situation became so dire that the neighbors called the police, they took both of them to hospital. She was psychotic, and he was near death from exhaustion, malnutrition, and…
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DW Otherwise Healthy in stage 7 & can I have a life?
DW is 68. I see her 5 days a week on Face Time. She has absolutely no coherent speech and does not recognize me in any way or respond to her name. She has no skills and does not recognize a cookie on a plate. She clearly likes her personal caretaker, is happy taking showers, has to be hand fed everything, weighs 118…
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looking for one on one caregiver therapy
I've been taking care of my 93 year old mom with the help of daytime aides for almost 4 years now and her dementia is progressing a lot faster now. I have little emotional assistance and am very stressed and depressed and need someone professional to support and help me. I feel that due to Covid there must be some virtual…