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How can I protect my DH from making a complete fool of himself?
My DH is progressing and is currently in stage 3-4 of dementia. He is still very social out in public, and people talking to him for a short time would never believe he has any issues. Last week we attended a neighborhood function - we have only been here since late October - and he spent time talking with a woman who is a…
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Stage 8 one month in
Most days are fine. Every once in awhile I feel the strong urge to go home and check to see if my DH is okay. I think I have been away from him for too long. I am still at my daughter's house. Father's Day was tough but I kept busy. Now tomorrow is the 1 month anniversary of his passing and I hope someday the 22nd will be…
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In person community prorgrams
Does anyone live in a community that sponsors in person programs for early stage dementia people? I and other folks in the Columbus, Oh area are withering away because we have no place to take our loved ones for socialization. Our sponsors still like to gather and talk. Maybe we can adopt something another city is doing.…
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Hope for our current suffering
I am hoping this video might help when you are feeling hopeless. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQ5h_HB5rbQ
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Off Topic: Spinal Fusion Input
Sorry to take this off topic. My DH is older; 81 and a Type II Diabetic. (He does not have dementia, but I feel a bit of concern re anesthesia effect on an elder.) He is scheduled for back surgery with Laminectomy and Fusions at multiple sites: L2,3; L3,4; and L4,5. I am not greatly concerned re laminectomies, but do have…
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Jack Hanna's Alz. story
https://www.yahoo.com/news/jack-hannas-long-goodbye-alzheimers-100110678.html
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mixed emotions
someone tell me how do you take your LO to a memory care facility without feeling so bad on the inside. I know in my heart this is the right thing for me. caregiver burnout is for real. i have it and i cant control it anymore. what makes it even worse is i know he would be ok at home if only one of his children would take…
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Do people with stage 2 regress to past toxic behaviors
He was toxic previously, anger, defensive, always never his fault . Separated, he got help, returned for 4 wonderful years, all issues gone, took full responsibility for past toxic behavior….. last 6-8 months though, he us now in stage 2 gds score of 4.5 , seeing same behavior return, not often, but enough to worry me,…
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Netflix or Disney Plus
It has been a long time since I've posted anything on this site. In fact this is the first time since the format change so I'm going to keep my question simple today. Besides regular TV we have had Netflix for years. I'm finding my LO just isn't very interested in most of the shows on them. He has always been a Disney fan…
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Experience 12 Minutes In Alzheimer's Dementia
If you haven't seen this, it is eye opening. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LL_Gq7Shc-Y&t=29s
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Is it just me?
It was a year ago to the date, when I was going thru a period where my dw's behaviors were peaking. So I am wondering if this is the case with others. The reason I am wondering is, my dw is showing some older behaviors, not being cooperative, crying, she is usually OK when they tell her I am coming back tomorrow and that I…
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O.T. Streaming TV terms explained
I think we have a few members who are in the dark when it comes to streaming TV. If so, this should be helpful. I didn't know all the definitions either, so don't feel bad. It's good to know the basics. https://www.techhive.com/article/1484154/cord-cutter-glossary.html
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In early phases, when to inform financial advisors/banks?
My dh has slow progression of bvFTD, diagnosed by the neuropsych in 2015. (In the followup with a neurologist he agreed dh has some sort of dementia, but didn't want to name it. It leaves a question in my mind. The neuropsych was very sure about the FTD; also said dh has high cognitive reserve.) My husband has continued to…
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The highlight of my day...
You know you are in caregiver land when discovering a new restroom location is an exciting event! if we take a certain route and plan carefully, we can be out and about for a couple of hours now. Library has 2 large bathrooms, AG Hall, also has one, also local market next to the Post office. This has been our "safe" route…
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Dementia Conversation
My DW, late stage 6, still speaks, but mostly it’s gibberish—word salad, invented words, impossible to follow. But yesterday, clear as a bell. Here’s the convo: DW (not looking at me): Honey? Me: Yes? DW: Not you Me: whom are you looking for? DW: I want to kiss my husband Me: Am I your husband? DW: No Me: Do you want to…
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Strange new behaviors
So, I feel that we are definitely entering into a new phase after being on a plateau for about 6 months. Most recently, my DH seems to be having a silent dialog with himself, accompanied by sudden gestures, and charade like behavior, while asleep or awake. Yesterday he was napping in a chair and seemed to be acting out a…
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I'm hurting
Today is father's day, and in 6 days my wife will be gone 1 year. Yes, dementia causes hurt, but for me it was nothing like death. Not even close. We spent a lifetime together. Today I would like to be alone, but that won't happen. The lyrics of this song really got to me. The music doesn't start until 10 silent seconds…
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Waking up at time like it is daytime
My DH is waking up at 2 or 3 am, getting showered and going downstairs. He then stays up for an hour and goes back to sleep. He says he doesn't understand why he gets up. Is this sundowning or something else? He goes to bed at 8:30 or 9 p.m. every night without any behavior issues in the evening. Any suggestions/thoughts?
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The hide and seek game (just smaller scale)
I'd like to know from others with LO's in MC if you have trouble keeping up with their belongings. Not losing things from the room, but constantly rearranging the things that are in the room. Her restlessness with possessions is striking. I try to keep the number of things and clothes pretty low, but even then--today i…
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Need volunteers and Adult Day Care in Seymour area
I am caring for a spouse and have no relief at all. I cannot seem to find any volunteers to come and stay with him for a few hours or an adult day care in the area to give me some time that is not costly. Does anyone know of any services in my area that might help, we don't qualify for Medicaid or Veteran aid unless we…
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Help
Hello, I am so torn about making the decision to place LO in memory care. I am his only caregiver, 27/7. Just when I have reached my limitations, the last 2 weeks have been more manageable. How do you know when it is truly time for memory care?
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Elder orphans
Just curious if anyone else will be or is an elder orphan after this is over. I'm in my early sixties, no children of my own. Still young enough to enjoy life when this ordeal is said and done but wonder quite often what could happen to me someday if I need help and I'm still alone as I get older. I do have a brother and…
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From the NYT: Hospice Is a Profitable Business, but Nonprofits Mostly Do a Better Job
https://www.nytimes.com/2023/06/10/health/hospice-profits.html?unlocked_article_code=8H_NrKKGVq1y27D6uN_0Pd_x3T5c-NcJSFV_g2jMczDSmdI6gOWEBVOesUDra2_8K-2o7I4M18PtOEOuUJCSCPADR7f6DTDFoE_pmqOKyFV97x3MS8s4gLjXYkVKwblCLhffGsafVwCgpKFRNMGTqNDXNGhQ6L_mQ9IH8Hy4IkWCpGukeXE1Lw8kYm1R1aTq6C4W9wJU7xGUQmLYqVj6MylXoi3nA3IDCOG8D5-UHnoFOcv2…
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Stage 5 clothing issues
Hi, everybody. I am wondering if others have dealt with an issue that is driving me crazy and has been going on for a while now. The issue is what my DH will wear when he is at home. When we go out, he is fine dressing as he always has -- t-shirt, cargo pants, fleece jacket on top for warmth. At home is a different story.…
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Hearing Loss
My husband who is in the latter stage of Alzheimer's is having a hard time hearing me. I can't decide if he is just exerting his will and not opening his eyes when I try to wake him for lunch or if he is not hearing me. Any ideas?
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Dealing with anger outbursts/taking car keys
Hello - My FIL has Alzheimers and is in his 80’s. My MIL cares for him. He can do basic tasks such as dressing, bathing, but often times looks disheveled. Yesterday, I get a call from my MIL who says my FIL (while at a coffee shop), suddenly took the car keys from her from the ignition when they arrived. He refused to give…
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How to not be a nag about brushing teeth
I'm new to this wonderful community and have a "nagging" problem I need advice on. Most every evening, I have to remind/tell DH to brush his teeth and he usually responds with either "no, I don't need to brush every day" or rolls his eyes, gets mad and does it. It's becoming a once a day stress right before bed. I don't…
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confused about the different categories of care facilities
Hello, Although Ive been following a lot of posts I am still not clear on the different kinds of facilities. Assisted Living, Memory Care, Nursing Home, et al. Also, a lot of people who have placed someone still seem to be giving showers, and lots of other personal care. Can anyone break this down so i can save the…
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My Child Helps Pay My Bills. Do I Need to Tell Medicaid? (From elder law answers)
I'm applying to Medicaid. I am over the income limit but have household expenses that exceed my income. My daughter also contributes so that I can make ends meet. Does Medicaid consider the money my daughter provides for support additional income? Or, does Medicaid view the money from others as a demonstration of need? I'm…
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By White Crane: "I can't be an adult."
That was what my husband said to me yesterday morning. He was upset and said it several times. When I asked him what he meant, he said, "I can't drive a car anymore. I can't ride a bike. I can't go for a walk by myself; I might get lost. I can't stay by myself. I need someone with me. I can't go to a store and buy…