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Leaving PWDs home alone
This is something that has bothered me for quite a while. As unpleasant as it may sound, many PWDs are functioning at the levels of children. They are not safe to be alone because they have no or very little concept of causality. Meaning, they do not comprehend if...then... If there is an emergency, then do...what? They…
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Using a stair lift
My spouse is in stage 6 Alzheimer’s and is having difficulty going up and down the steps. I already have a gait belt for her, but my decision is do we buy a stair lift to get her to our 2nd floor bedroom and bathroom, or, move her downstairs to the main floor? We only have a powder room on the first floor. Has anyone…
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New song
I heard a new song on a famous social site and went and heard the whole song.it is called. NEVER NOT REMEMBER YOU. Only been out 2 days. Might not be for everybody,tear alert is all I can say. Hugs to everyone. Stewart
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When is the right time?
My husband has early onset alzheimers - he's currently 63 and was diagnosed three years ago. He has been declining rapidly, and we have entered a phase where some hygiene issues have become untenable. I have researched and toured several memory care facilities, and submitted a deposit for one of them. My grown children…
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Diagnosis Already
DH had his MRI, and the results came in later that day. His doctor at the outpatient MC called me and wanted to meet with me in person. Once there she explained to me what the findings meant. He has mixed dementia, AZ, VD and I think it also implies that the hippocampus is involved. M1, you can correct me on this.…
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Our 1 yr anniversary of dw gone from home.
Well I have hit that 1 yr mark since dw went to a geripsych and never came home. The days leading up to that fateful day were for my dw and me stressful beyond anything I could have imagined! The days after were even more stressful. I got sick for 8 days that started a 30 pound weight loss overall which finally seems to…
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How to motivate PWD
My 69 yo DH is currently diagnosed with MCI. He has no motivation to do anything now that DIY projects are out of the picture (due to him breaking whatever he's trying to fix). He was excited to go shopping for some games that his Dr. had recommended, along with a puzzle. He also wanted some crossword puzzles and word…
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Alzheimer's prevalence, mapped
https://www.axios.com/2023/07/27/alzheimers-prevalence-map
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Late stage dementia & DH Update
My DH has been in memory care for almost a year and a half. Today it dawned on me that we're entering territory that I don't often hear personal stories about. So I thought I'd share, and update those of you who have followed our story. DH is now stage 7e. That's the second to last stage = "Can no longer smile." I haven't…
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How long does a diagnosis take?
My husband is having memory issues and his MRI shows brain atrophy. We are working with a neurologist to figure out what's going on, but he still doesn't have a diagnosis after almost a year. How long did it take for your loved ones to get an official diagnosis? He's 51, so we would be looking at early onset alzheimers if…
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Adult Day Care
I am having a difficult time. I really wanted my 75 year old DH to join a local adult day care. JCC on Long Island. I was so hoping that I could have respite and he could get more socialization. I have been loosing my patience and temper lately which doesn’t help. I’m feel like I’m going down a rabbit hole with him he had…
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Wife rejects medications
My wife has Alzheimer's, in the moderate stage at least. It has gotten a lot worse in the past six months. She argues about taking medications and sometimes refuses, and says she's tired of me and everyone telling her what to do. She gets very angry about this. Sometimes (like now) she has bad back pain and won't get out…
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struggles about who is in charge of finances
how do you deal with controlling spouse who doesn't see any need to turn over responsibility for finances ????? Recently, he wrote several bad checks or just didn't pay people but won't see that as any problem...
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Where do I fit in?
Since we dont have a diagnosis yet, I feel like I'm in a unique situation from everyone else here. My husband is having some memory issues (nothing terrible yet, just some forgetfulness), and his mri shows brain atrophy. He is 51 and one doctor compared it to the brain of a 70 year old man, which sounds terrible! My…
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Grab Bars Around Toilet
I’m trying to be proactive as I see my DH getting frail. And I have crappy bones and will probably break something along the way. So I am looking at putting grab bars in around the toilet. Has anyone done this? If so, what did you get and how did your PWD react to it? Did you get vertical? Horizontal? Slanted? Flip down…
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A Different Perspective
DH and I met up with my daughter last night for dinner. She had not seen her step-father for a few weeks and was shocked and saddened by the apparent steep decline. I’ve mentioned in prior posts that she is the director of a memory care facility. I knew DH’s decline has been quicker during the past several months but she…
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Shower / Bath
What are some tips for getting a LO to take a shower? Or a bath? All I get is a defiant "NO".
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By White Crane: Update on DH skin condition and shaving tip
I posted awhile back that DH skin was very dry and he had sores on his chest, legs, and even his scalp. I am happy to report that the sores are almost all cleared up. Some of you were kid enough to recommend some skin creams that were very helpful. I've been trying to give him sponge baths a few times a week and rubbing…
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For M1-your thoughts on twilight anesthesia
Putting this in the spouse forum where M1 is more likely to see it. M1- I’d like your thoughts on twilight anesthesia and it’s affect on dementia. I know general anesthesia has a detrimental affect. My step-dad has a corneal abrasion or ulcer ( optometrist said ulcer, opthalmologist said abrasion). It’s due to entropion (…
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Becoming a Representative Payee for Social Security
Is there any benefit to becoming DH's representative payee? Seems it requires a lot of trouble to get approval and possibly having to open a separate savings/checking account and keep accounting of this money. Currently, every monthly payment is auto deposited and available to pay for bills. So why is this needed?
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New to the Forum
Sadly, I find myself needing a place for support. My partner was diagnosed with MCI 3 years ago. This last year, she suddenly was struggling to find words. Seriously struggling. We thought she might have had a stroke, it was such a sudden, drastic change. But, the diagnosis came back again with MCI + extreme anxiety from…
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What am I missing ?
Scenario today… Me: Going to grocery store to pick up a few things for dinner tomorrow with the grandchildren. Also asked DH what would you like for dinner tonight! DH : Could you get some fish maybe flounder. Me: Sure I’ll do that. so get flounder bring it home go to see my cousin. Come home a bit later DH not home but…
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Gig Harbor support group
Are there any spouses out there who would like to join a support group? We have a really good one in Gig Harbor and we meet once a week. It is not structured and you can feel free to say whatever you want. We are more like a group of friends and we would always welcome anyone who wants to come.
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Preplanned divorce? Thoughts?
Would anyone divorce their spouse before a Alzheimer's diagnosis? I am the person at risk: My father, 6 of his 8 siblings, my half-sister (22 years my senior) all passed away due to Alzheimer's. I am 51 now and am definitely not as sharp as I was with mental math, remembering numbers I've always remembered like CC,…
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When To File For SSDI?
DW received Alzheimer's diagnosis last week. Per the advice of many, we have made an appointment with a CELA, it that doesn't happen for another month. She still works part-time, but wants to quit to enjoy the rest of her somewhat lucid time. I didn't want to make any moves before consulting the atty. but my gut says file…
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Need a shoulder
One of the most difficult things about this caregiving stuff is that my family, every family, has other challenges in addition to our LO's diagnosis. It's just so much. I have an anxiety disorder. I was a nervous kid who grew up to be a nervous adult. Because I’ve dealt with it so long, I am able to work through panic…
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Logopenic Progressive Aphasia
Has anyone else been told their LO has this? After having a PET and and EEG, our physician said that he feels that my DH has this specific variant of Alzheimer's. Google has not been very helpful in obtaining information on this!! The Dr. also mentioned that there was a speech therapist doing research on patients with this…
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Practical Road Map
DW diagnosed ALZ at 64. Still able to work part time. I know generally what needs to happen like POA, wills, etc. But I want to go about it correctly in the proper order. Do I meet with Elder Care Attorney? Do I file for SSID immediately? Do I meet with estate planner? I welcome all personal experiences and links to…
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I'm ranting... this may be too much to read but... should I send this to my daughter?
We only had the official diagnosis of Alzheimer's on May 31st. Since then we let all three of our adult children know, my DH's sister and husband, and a select number of DH's closest friends. I was hoping from the family that they would appreciate the seriousness of what is happening but it seems they are not. Maybe…
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Dirty Liar
My DW has Early-Onset Alz. I hate feeling like a dirty liar when I agree with her about her driving again. I agree when she says she is looking forward to growing old together, etc. Recently and without anyone's notice or approval, her brother gave my wife's Toyota 4-Runner, which he was keeping, to his daughter (my W's…