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Mother making up stories
Hi, I'm new here. My 74 yo mother is staying with my son and I for the summer, until my son goes back to school. My son is 9 yo. My mother has been making up toxic stories about me, telling her friends and even my adult daughter. This has been going on for about a month and I just found out. My mother also believes I am…
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As caregivers what do we do with all those feelings.....
As I look forward to going to work this morning after a long weekend with DH, I feel guilty leaving him home. But at the same time relieved I am leaving to go to work. DH is still able to be by himself for periods of time and between a combination of home health and my ability to telework he is taken care of. I have to go…
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NYT Magazine: Racing to Retake a Beloved Trip, Before Dementia Takes Everything
A touching story about a daughter and father's trip to Europe. I gifted article so it's unlocked for 30 days. I learned about a 1950's themed adult day care and artificial village called Town Square. But the key part of the story is about reminiscence.…
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Freaking out
I read that 1/3 of caretakers pass before the PWD goes. I depend on my mom to take care of dad until he dies. But my mom also have beginning signs of Alzheimer's and don't know how it will progress. I don't know what to do if either one passes away and how I can step in to take care of them when their conditions worsen.
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Smoking
My mom stopped smoking in January, not because she wanted to but because it just wasn't safe so no one would buy her cigarettes' any longer. In early February she went into a SNF, there for 9 weeks. She came home and was doing find without cigarettes. It has been 6 months and she hasn't had a cigarettes. She had tried 3…
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Resistant to redirection or distraction
Does anyone have experience with redirection or distracting not working? Specifically, PWD wants to wash takeout containers before eating. It's not just rinsing, but washing with soap, even paper containers. These attempts don't work: It's not necessary to wash them I'll do it myself, later You can do it later Please go…
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I want out!
Most of this is just a vent, but I really don't want to do this any longer. My HWD (I can't even call him my DH now) has become so mean. We recently visited with my sister and her husband along with other family members. My HWD has been telling me that he married the wrong sister! He says my sister is smarter, thinner,…
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Rough Week
Another rough week. I thought I had all the documentation to apply for Medicaid for my DH. The lawyer told me I still needed more. Now I have everything except two documents an I am waiting for them to be mailed to me. If they don't come soon, I will be paying Another $6,530 to the MC facility. Since I've already done the…
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How to know I’m making the best desicion
I’m new to the discussion. I need help. I am struggling with the deduction to bring my father to my home in California. He currently lives by himself in another state has had a dementia diagnoses since 2017. Currently he his doctors have recommended for him not to drive. VA has only approved 6 hours a week of home health.…
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Any Gay men out there?
I am a Gay guy living in the Southwest, taking care of my husband who has moderate memory issues. It would be helpful to communicate with another person in my situation. Thanks.
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Should I Tell His Family?
My DH (61) was recently diagnosed with MCI most likely due to ALZ. There’s family history and his IQ has plummeted. He had the full neuropsych work up and that was the conclusion. He’s somewhat in denial, but is coming to terms. He doesn’t want me to tell anyone. I’m seeing declines monthly. I have no clue how fast this…
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Medicaid (MD)
Trying to understand. When an individual gets to a certain point in paying for medical costs, they can approach Medicaid. From what little i have read, there is a provision where they wil require the individual to spend their own resources until they reach a certain limit. In MD 2500 (?) for individuals and a higher amount…
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Getting a diagnosis for someone refusing to notify a doctor
New here! My mother doesn't have a diagnosis yet--she's been refusing to address her memory loss issues or tell her doctor what is going on. My stepfather has been helping her with routine tasks and even going with her to doctor's appointments (for unrelated issues), which has masked her loss of cognitive function. Earlier…
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Has anyone else experienced this?
My HWD keeps insisting that his clothes are wet. They aren't, although they may feel a little cool to the touch due to the air conditioning. He is putting things in the dryer on high and leaves them in for a long time until they feel dry to him. If I tell him they aren't, he gets very angry and begins shouting that I am…
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Checking in
Hello my friends! Just thought I'd check in. I just "celebrated" our 32nd anniversary, so thought it would be a good time to update everyone on what's going on now. DH is finally fairly comfortable. After years of his extreme agitation, anxiety, and whatever else was going on, he's now fairly calm. He turned 60 last…
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Hallucinations
I'm new to this group and hope to get some suggestions on how to handle this journey. My husband is 75 and I am 66. He was diagnosed with dementia over a year ago but there has been signs for 5-6 years. He's told me many times he sees old people at night and I just blew it off and told him they were probably ghosts since…
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WRONG DECISION
My 88 year old mom has dementia, age related memory loss, depression, stubbornness, and selfishness. She lives 1000 miles away from me and decided to try to live in the same town as me. She moved from her home with daily care to a supported living apartment. She's miserable being here and I'm miserable having her here but…
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Getting angry/firm with mom
My mom is in late stage dementia. In SKN memory care. She cries and cries. She is anxious. She is on meds of course, they never seem to really work very well. Here's the thing, What happens if we get in mom's face and say, just stop crying! I watched someone else do this with their mom and wondered, does that really help?
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A new unexpected life.
I worked hard for 45 years in a self employed stressful medical business. Have a wife and three kids and I worked scared all my life. Always what if. what if I die. What if I am disabled. What if the kids aren't brought up right and get into trouble. What if they can't find jobs. Etc. I denied myself enjoyment in the name…
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Tam Cummings: Loss of ability to smile - indicative that death is near
Yet again I seek your insights into my DW's decline through Stage 7. She is still losing weight, but is still with us. The document from the Fisher Center, recommended on this site as a staging tool, further breaks down Stage 7 into six substages 7a-7f. Although my DW has Semantic Dementia not AD, in Stage 7 the issues are…
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Leqembi infusions
Hello. My DH has been diagnosed with Alzheimers and recently began receiving Leqembi infusions every two weeks. I would appreciate hearing from any other caregivers who are undertaking this treatment. I'm looking for support and advice or tips.
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How to redirect on a phone call
I posted this in general, but then saw the option for "long distance care", so reposted it here: My mom is in a memory care facility 3 hours away from me. Often, we have very pleasant conversations over the phone. Recently, she has been saying she is trying to call her mom/dad to pick her up and take her home (they have…
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Didn't see Mom now for two weeks
Hello, I usually see my Mom every week. However I started a new job so last week I couldn't see her and today I locked myself out at the gym and needed an employee to cut the lock after I tried numerous times to try to unlock my lock. Why am I starting a new discussion because I can only see my Mom before I go straight to…
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Saw my Mom Today
It's been 8 years that my Mom is in a NH. So today, I spoke to her like it was her first time meeting me. I told her who I am and that I got a haircut, I asked her if I looked good. Can you believe she spoke and said yes! We also prayed together, I of course pray only. This desiese is strange but I know it's just a good…
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Today's Win
After some conversations with my state senator (and her super nice aide) the state of Delaware passed a resolution today naming September 22-29, 2024 FTD Awareness Week. It was oddly emotional to be there to see it pass.
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Alf soon
Mom is 83 and doesn't have a formal diagnosis yet, but Definitely some sort of dementia. We have a neurologist appt in Sept. Due to her memory, she needs help, with meds, food, and some Healthcare. After her last surgery I finally got her agree to move to ALF, Dr' all agree. She's supposed to move in July 12th. She is now…
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Is there an open forum for people to speak about their experiences?
Hi there, I’m Jen and my daddy has vascular dementia after suffering a stroke last year. I would like to find a place where I can talk with people in similar situations so we can share our experiences and support each other. Does anyone know where I can find such a forum please?
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Product for missing the toilet?
hi all, my dad has moderate/advanced ALZ/Dem and is in AL. He is consistently missing the toilet when he urinates, and then becomes extremely irritated because he thinks the toilet is leaking. I see on Amazon there are many disposable “pee pad” products for around the base of the toilet, has anyone had luck with these?…
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Teaching dad to care for mom
My dad believes he is ‘caring’ for my mom (who has mid-stage dementia) but I disagree. He/They want to stay at home but his version of care and conditions are deplorable. I want to educate him on what true care actually is. Any recommendations on organizations or services to do so? In home help has been vehemently refused…
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DH not "feeling well"
my husband was diagnosed with Alzheimer's about a year ago, but showed symptoms for several years. Like others, I was dismissed by physicians and nor believed by this children. He is still pretty functional, but lately sleeps a lot. Says he "does not feel well" almost every day. I ask if stomach, headache etc. he does not…