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Perceived reality
My mom is having a day where her perceived reality is running wild. She believes that she will be going to go get food with another person. However, we do not have a car and she has had no contact with other people since she lost her phone at least a week ago. I haven't been able to replace it yet. She has asked me to go…
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Broken tooth and dentist
I've discovered that my DH has a broken tooth and he is digging into his mouth, thinking he's got something stuck between his teeth. He refuses to go to the dentist. What can I do???
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recommendations for elder law attorney in Minneapolis/St. Paul?
I've looked at the links that could help me locate an elder law attorney, but I'm curious if anyone has worked with, and can recommend, an elder law attorney in the Minneapolis/St. Paul area? I always like getting referrals from real people who have "been there and done that". 😉 Thanks in advance for any ideas!
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Driving Stress and Key Keeping
Hello. Would love opinions today! My mom has stage 5 dementia. She is currently obsessed with driving again. She failed the cognitive exam and as a result, has had her license suspended. Her car lives in her garage. I have BOTH sets of her keys. One I swiped when she first exhibited scary driving symptoms (she doesn't know…
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caregiver needs help
My wife has vascular dementia. She is very articulate, very social and very stubborn. She has had several falls resulting in broken hips and vertebrae, but doesn't think she needs help. I have employed a caregiver couple half-days a week. Generally this provide a nasty response each time the person arrives. Regularly she…
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Yet another car discussion
DH has only driven his car once in two years (last time was March 2023) and because of non-use, the battery is dead. Thank goodness. I have no intention of getting it fixed or telling him its the battery. Instead, I just say, "its broken." He occasionally thinks about driving but when he does, he goes out to the car and…
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10 things "I've" learned about MC's.
These are just a few of the things I've seen in the last 6mo. My DW is in a fairly decent facility but there is no perfect place. When you place your LO in an MC facility and walk away, that will be one of the hardest days of your life. The staff are generally well meaning, caring and perform an incredibly difficult job…
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working with incontinence
DH is beginning to have wetting issues…he goes to toilet but it takes him forever to pee, then after he finishes there is wet all over his pants. I think this is age as much as Alz, but hate for him to be out on public and visible. I believe there are pads to put in his underwear, looking for suggestions and brands, please.
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I don’t know what to do, & no real support
My mom is 82, lives with me annd my husband and has VD, DM2,CKD4. She recently spent a week and 1/2 in the hospital after I found her non responsive for severe UTI w/3 ureter stones. Her blood sugars are wnl. We noticed even before her hospitalization she was sleeping more and saying she wasn’t hungry or that she was…
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Can't wake her up. Has this ever happened to anyone?
While visiting my mom who has moderate dementia she fell asleep sitting on the couch next to me (she was snoring). When it was time for bed I went to wake her up and she would not wake up. My dad and I were shaking her, talking to her, laying her down on the couch but she never opened her eyes or responded to us in any…
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It’s a marathon, not a sprint
Sitting by my sleeping husband’s bedside in the ER for his fifth agitation/aggression admission since May, have been reflecting on what I’ve learned about hospitalizations. When his memory care called me last night with the news he had had another altercation and was going to the ER, first I took a deep breath. Then I…
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Special needs trust
We’re meeting with a lawyer to go over our wills. There’s going to be a discussion about “self settled special needs trust” vs “third party trust”. My wife is turning 65 on October 12. She was just diagnosed this year. I’m thinking a third party trust would be fine. Does that make sense?
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Burn out
how do you all deal with burn out! I just visited my sister, her situation is dire. Can’t walk (broke hip 2 years ago - the original reason she’s at assisted living; then broke both legs a year later - her fermur bone literally snapped, the other leg broke when she went down ), legs severely swollen (she refuses to elevate…
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Need support hubby needs assisted living
I’m at my wits end. I can’t handle having him here anymore. He’s having incontinence a few times a week. Sleeps until noon or 1 pm. Can’t remember last time he showered. I gave up on asking him. Didn’t shave etc. I just had talk with him saying it might be a good idea if we move him to assisted living. He just stared at me…
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How much longer does my dad have to be humiliated
my dad was diagnosed ALZ Dementia and aphasia in 2020. He was able to live in his house with little assistance for 2 years then just needed more and more help and got more and more confused. I had to place him in MC in august 2023 but he was still walking everyday and pretty good at trying to communicate. In the last month…
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Donepezil side effects
My mom has been on donepezil for a little over a month. I felt like the pills were making things worse for a while, but the last couple of weeks she seems to have been a little better, remembering more conversations and walking me through her bookkeeping process. I was starting to feel hopeful. She’s been complaining that…
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For my auntie
Just joined, walking in Tinley Park Saturday, interested in starting a support group at a wellness comm center.
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Home health and help
So, my father in law has dementia. Me and my wife stay a whole lot with him. We live beside them on their land. They have a will but not a living trust. In Mississippi if you go into a nursing home just your will, will not help save your assets. They have Medicare part b and d I know. My question is will the SS insurance…
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Moms eyes are shut
Anyone visit their LO and find their eyes shut from guk? I used a wash cloth with warm water but could not get her to open her eyes today. Any advice? I asked the CNA and no help. Other than that I kissed, hugged and prayed with her.
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Is there really a good place?
What is the point of memory care? I feel like my mom won’t ever be happy anywhere. Couldn’t hack it in assisted living. But I have never seen her this depressed. Like what is the point of any of these places?
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Mom with MCI and low dbp
Hello dear community, I usually come to you with questions about Dad in MC. This time I am concerned for my Mom. She still lives independently with an MCI diagnosis. Last fall and winter were really rough for her. So as daylight lessens and chily nights creep in I find myself watching her even more than usual. Anyway, she…
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So confused. I don’t know what to do.
I just read Clarinetist’s post about Plan D. I think I’m in the exact same predicament. DH has been in and out of hospitals in at least 8 different nursing units since mid July. He had been doing pretty well but sundowning with quite a bit of aggression kicked in. During these pat. 2 mos. He had one unsuccessful GPU stay.…
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Need help for my mom
My step father is caring for my mom who is quite advanced, she doesn’t really get any interaction with anyone, they live in a small town in Nevada so not many resources there. My step dad is slowly losing it with my mom, short fuse and all, he wants to put her in a State home but mom still recognizes everyone , just has a…
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Hospital vs. MC (warning: graphic description of injury)
Yesterday morning I got a call from MC that they had called 911 to transport mom to the ER. The MC staff found mom sitting on the floor with a "bad cut" on her arm. When I asked if they were sure she needed the ER, they told me she would need stitches. When I asked if I could take her instead of sending her by ambulance,…
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Lecanemab
Has anyone started or familiar with the latest drug approved last July 2023 - Lecanemab -- What would be the benefit?
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fall vaccines
Curious to know how others have approached the issue of getting vaccines (COVID, flu, RSV) for your LO with dementia. My mom is later stages now where taking her out of the house, even to a doctor's appointment is becoming a big challenge. There are no options I can find to provide vaccines in the home. Considering how…
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When do you take the keys?
mom is in the early stages. She loses her phone and is surprised that all she needs is her pocket book to start the car (keyless ignition and “key” in her purse). She does drive to the same three places all the time and the doctor said she passed “that part” of the cognitive test. Given that she came to my house the other…
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Specific delusion help
Hi all, My 88yo Dad has mid- to late- stage mixed Alz/vascular dementia and lives in memory care. I did read some other threads here on delusions and got the basics down. For about a week now he has a delusion: he is in a hotel in Houston (Texas), a medical conference has just finished, and he needs to get back to Wichita…
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Sometimes you just can't win
So...my brother. He just sent me an email telling me that I was using an old email address for him. I checked. The last two emails that he sent me was from that old address. Now, I have to be certain that I'm using his preferred email address (no matter which one he used) or he'll think I'M confused. Sigh.
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Zaleplon 5mg to sleep
has anyone used this medication to help sleep at night? Prescribed by my dads doctor sometimes it helps sometimes it doesnt. Any feedback thanks