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Grr-r-rrr DMV and DH
What's worse than having to go to the DMV to renew your driver's license? Having to take your DH with you. Our state became a Real ID state which means to renew your license you have to have all kinds of proof to show that you are really you and that you live at the address that's on your license. I had all of my paperwork…
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off topic: Late summer
One of the many beautiful things my partner has done on the farm is to replant 57 acres of native grasses. This was a very interesting project, involved working with Tennessee Wildlife Resources Agency for free seed, seed drill, and access to very, very expensive selective herbicide to get rid the fescue and broadleaf…
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A phone call, a visit
Got to briefly FaceTime with my partner today for the first time in three weeks. She looked awful. Was just let out of covid quarantine yesterday, and she still looked quite ill and very tired, very confused. Going to take lunch on Tuesday, will be the first in person visit in almost two months. I don't know what to hope…
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5 years in Memory care-Random thoughts
This month DW will hit 5 years in memory care. Her good physical condition is a tribute to good facility care and a fine personal caretaker. But her brain is completely gone . The wonderful woman I married 47 years ago is long gone. Please do not suggest that she is "in there" and just can't communicate. That just hurts .…
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Phone Calls
If you had a parent with AD that is making multiple phone calls to friends and family on an hourly basis (and these are brief calls, pleasant and conversational, but they do ask the same questions that were asked previously) how would you respond? Do you disconnect the landline? Do you try to establish a boundary (do not…
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An empty chair and being bedridden
My DH has to be in bed because he can't pull himself out of his lift recliner in late afternoon. And I am so frustrated because of this In this case, I don't think it is the end stages. He has been immobile for over 3 years. He can still feed himself, knows when he has to go to the bathroom, can laugh with me, understands…
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Off topic(1)
So I wanted to start a thread that asks the question. "What do you still do for your lo even though it may not matter anymore? I still push mow the area close to the house, because dw didn't like the way the rider mower did it. It takes me an hour to push mow and I don't dilly around. I figure I get some good cardio and I…
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Support cushions, looking for suggestions
I am the husband and primary caregiver for my wife. As new challenges arise in her care I have been doing pretty well at meeting them and coming up with solutions so far. Now I am hoping to get some suggestions for a few problems. I have noticed that she is having more trouble sitting upright and keeping her head up. This…
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Fascinating
Today we are home alone and I have nothing scheduled I have to do work wise so I am all the way in the moment with my wife. Today she is delusional happy. I am going along with everything she is saying hallucination wise. In her reality we are at work and she is a new hire that has absolutely no idea what she is supposed…
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End stage is so hard
And it seems to go on and on. DH is end stage of Alz, but not actively dying. This has been going on since Nov. He is 66 and was diagnosed 6 years ago. His decline was fast. He was relatively young and healthy so I feared he'd get to this end stage rather than die of something else. So here we are. He's been in MC two…
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Starting to Feel I Need Help
My DH who’s is 18 years my senior was diagnosed in 2018 w Alz. I have gone through a roller coaster of emotions and have gone through the stages of grief. Now I accept though the continued changes are very challenging. My sons are now out of the house and being alone w my DH is lonely and stressful but still I feel I’ve…
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Alternative to Colonoscy
Today we went for our annual Wellness Check. Handyman went grudgingly saying he did not need it and it is just a way for the Docs to make a quick buck. What ever. I fibbed and said we could lose our Medicare Coverage. He went, but pouted in the car the whole way. Again…what ever…he went. Things were just find until we got…
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She is on to the next level
Well we had a few good days. I have learned to appreciate good days with reserve. It's never a good day trend. They seem to be calms before the next storm. My wife is 100% psychotic now. Extremely angry her reality is in another place and another time. It seems like hell. She can have a few moments of calm and right back…
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Question about olanzapine
My dw has been on olanzapine which is zyprexa for about a month and a half, she take 7.5 in the morning, 2.5 at noon and 7.5 at night. I am noticing her sundowning is getting a little worse. Every thing I have read said 20mg is the daily max. Is anybody out there giving more than that? I am worried that if they need to…
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Behavior and rapid decline
hi, LO was diagnosed w/AZ in April. Since then, and especially over the past month or so, I've seen his behavior spiral down. He has frequent temper tantrums that seem to last for days. Usually it's because he can't find something, or can't read numbers on his phone. But, today was way different. I heard commotion in the…
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Strange What I Will Call A Win
As many of you know I placed DW 9-1/2 months ago and as I previously posted she is happy at the MC and has never asked about home. Also it has been several years since DW acknowledged that I am her husband. So yesterday when I arrived for a visit the first thing she said was, “I’m going to kill you”, I responded “what” and…
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On Further Reflection
Some long-time members here might recall that several years ago I produced a photo calendar, In Her View. It featured the professional quality photographs taken by my wife before her 14 year (so far) journey in dementia began. I wanted to celebrate her talent, her ability to see beauty in a scene most of us would pay no…
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Care Facility Search
Just a quick vent. I’ve used my precious free time to tour two facilities this week. I have another scheduled for Friday. The marketing of assisted living and memory care facilities comes straight from the new car sales textbook. Maybe we’ll watch Cadillac Man tonight.
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First visit
I went to see my dh this evening after work. I arrived during dinner, and didn't find him at first--I had thought he was eating in a different dining room. Anyway, when I found him, he was so happy to see me. We weren't allowed to walk around in the building--either his room or outside, but I brought him a few things and…
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I placed my beloved wife in an MC last Tuesday
DW was farther along than I was willing to accept and it was none to soon for her placement. I am devastated but I decided to place her when a room became available at a very highly regarded, family run MC only and I wanted to do it before a crisis. Although I've had it easy by comparison to others here, the issues were…
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New behaviour
My husband has started a new behaviour. He bites himself and yells. When I asked him why he does this, he replied he just wanted to see if he still feels things. He shrieks and starts making a buzzing sound. His sounds are varied in range and it is sort of like what autistic kids do to deal with over stimulation. The…
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An Update
Last week I posted that I was about to lose it. It was not a good week. DH left the house two days in a row and "went for a walk." Thankfully, he didn't wander too far and I was able to get him home safely but it shook me up. When he gets upset at me he sometimes does this. Then we had an appointment with the dermatologist…
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Feminine hygiene question
My DW is just beginning to have bathroom issues. She is now often not wiping when she pees, which I know because she also often forgets to flush the toilet. My question is whether this is medically risky for any reason. I THINK she is OK with wiping when pooping and there have yet to be any UTI issues, but she sometimes…
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Bending the Curve of Alzheimer's Disease
Acetylcholine is a critical compound needed for the retrieval of memory. The breakdown of acetylcholine by acetylcholinesterases is a problem early in Alzheimer's disease, but as Alzheimer's disease progresses acetylcholinesterase activity declines thus limiting the effectiveness of acetylcholinesterase inhibitors. The…
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Behavior Changes
My partner/best friend lives with me due to her Alzheimer's. She is going into moderate level. Lately, she is getting snarky, starting fights, and tonight, was screaming furiously at me because I spoke a truth instead of staying in her fantasy. I am still learning how to do that. Now, at 1 a.m., she is storming around…
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Nothing slows progression
I started this thread because Beryette posted We saw the neurologist yesterday for followup. He prescribed a patch to help slow progression. My response is If the physician said that it borders on malpractice. No medication stops the progression of this disease , What they do for a short period of time is help with…
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DH doesn’t know I live with him
Any ideas on what to do when DH doesn’t know I live with him. He didn’t want me in the house today.
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Phone calls make it worse?
My mom is in a board and care MC facility two states away. I call her and chat once a week at least, but our phone calls are getting harder and harder. She is starting to not really understand who I am and is barely able to have a conversation. My last call with her was so upsetting. She started crying, calling me momma…
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Got my colonoscopy done
Well, I was a little surprised. I've had a colonoscopy before, but this time the prep was much easier than it was last time. No stomach cramps like last time, but it's not fun to sit and wait for might/will happen at any time, for hours. I didn't realize how uncomfortable the bidet seat was. But a laptop makes it a little…
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Hospice care starting this week for my LO
My wife, 67 y.o. diagnosed 7 years ago with ALZ, is now at stage 7 and the palliative care physician recommended hospice care. She has been in the hospital for several weeks in a geriatric unit to get her meds right after some nighttime disruptive behaviors plus some underlying medical issues. She also had a couple of…