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Problems w/Payment for Day Care from the VA?
I'm not a spouse caregiver (care for my sister), but I thought this issue with the VA would be of interest to spousal caregivers: For about 8 months, my sister has been receiving adult day care services paid for by the VA. Apparently, there has been a problem for at least a couple of years with the authorization numbers…
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Questions about pwd remembering spouces name.
Hello everyone it hasn't happened yet, but I was wondering if the first time a pwd can't remember your name is that it. From then on out will they not remember or is it maybe somedays and then finally progresses to they never remember. My dw is starting to have troubles with nieces and nephews and there relationship with…
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Just need to talk to my friends (165)
Happy Monday morning! When I was working I always dreaded Mondays. The weekends went so fast - still don't like them because it's trash day and I have to get it down to the road before 8 a.m. When I first went out this morning the girls heard me and came around - they knew it was feed day. I took down the trash and came…
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Wife in MC Has Changed
Hi All. My wife went into MC last summer. I have seen her most every week - and special days - since. She has gotten steadily worse mentally and has been getting slower physically. She is at a point now whereas: 1) She does not smile anymore, 2) She is stooped, 3) She moves VERY slow and needs help walking, 4) Her skin…
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A setback in MC, then a fast recovery
As I've posted in recent weeks my wife is now in memory care and has adjusted and accepted it very well, accepting care, socializing with her fellow residents and staff, and smiling a lot. Then last week I got a call at 1:30 in the morning saying she had fallen and was being taken to the hospital. I rushed to the hospital…
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I see dementia in Kafka’s The Metamorphosis
Out of concern for losing my own brain function, I try and challenge myself. One thing I do is re-read literature I read in another era. Times change, and so do I, and I perceive different things in the next go-around. I was surprised at how many parallels I could draw between Gregor in The Metamorphosis and a dementia…
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useful factoid When they say the person is too young for Alzheimers
Dr Alzheimer's original patient was only 50 years old On November 3, 1906, a clinical psychiatrist and neuroanatomist, Alois Alzheimer, reported “A peculiar severe disease process of the cerebral cortex” to the 37th Meeting of South-West German Psychiatrists in Tubingen, He described a 50-year-old woman whom he had…
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So frustrated....no diagnosis yet!
My DH had a neuropsych test done end of 2020. It showed marked impairment. The neuropsych dr met with dh, both of our counselors and myself to go over results. She said she would term dh as vulnerable and wanted a driving eval. Wanted us to find new neuro for him and threw out the possibility of MS. She also wanted me to…
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Maybe it's not just music
Maybe things related to music are also held onto. Today I was singing "You belong to me", and told my wife I thought it might have been Peggy Lee who had the hit. She said it wasn't. Trying to think of someone else who might have had it, I said maybe it was Jo Stafford. She said "That's it". I asked "So you think Jo…
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Busman's holiday
I took a break from Alzheimer's yesterday to advocate for my older brother in the hospital .I wore a Jacket & tie for the first time in two years that was not to a funeral . Their discharge planning was FUBAR. I got the meeting because I complained to the state regulators. The brought two physicians and 5 staff members.…
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Happy National Caregivers Day
It is National Caregivers Day. How are YOU celebrating? Or rather, how are others celebrating you? I thought so. I fantasize that when I have my life back I will somehow bring attention to this gaping wound in our healthcare system and society. But for today, alas, I am cleaning the toilet for the 11th time, listening to…
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As Lynne, sleeping issues
As Lynne, my partner barely sleep at night. Now agressive behavior begin in the afternoon. As he is now in the MCF, it doesn’t directly disturb my own sleep. But it annoys me. Yesterday, he has broken the tablet they attributed him. He was very agitated, because he had a new letter from his mother. The caretaker tried to…
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Another glasses thread
I didn't want to add my problems to Markus's thread. I did share on his thread that I took DH for an eye exam last summer, thinking that it might be our last chance. He almost didn't make it through the exam, But the wonderful eye doctor was able to complete an exam using pictures and making assumptions based on his last…
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Exciting News: DH is now a grandpa
DH's son and his girlfriend welcomed their new baby to the world yesterday.
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Starting to panic
Hello everyone, My mother is on the placement list for the veterans home I worked at. They have begun admissions again. The list is going slow so it will be a while. I'm having panic attacks just thinking about placing her. Roles reversed as you all well know. I am her mother and she is my child. It's just her and me with…
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Lost wallet
I guess I knew it was only a matter of time before DH lost/hid his wallet. I had just begun taking his credit/debit cards and other essentials like the Medicare, VA, and health insurance cards one or two at a time so they wouldn't be missed. Unfortunately, the clock ran out on me and 3 weeks ago the wallet just vanished. I…
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So depressed and having a hard time
First of all, I want to thank everyone who responded to my last post. It was surely helpful. I have spoken to the Alz association and a consultant there. They gave me info but it's just too far away for me to access. However, when it comes to a doctor, I did contact my specialist and made an appt because if anyone…
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Hospital Bed for Husband
Would anyone know resources of how I can get a hospital bed for my husband? He has early onset Alz. I'm seeing a consistent trend of him not being able to put his feet on the floor to stand and get out of the bed in the morning without 2 people. We were managing by me moving his lower body, and then him pulling on my arm…
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Practical preparation for MC
I would like some recommendations for the preplanning needed for the placement of a spouse in MC. I have seen little to no discussion about the actual logistics of placement. Several of you on this forum have recently placed your LO and I hope you will take the time to respond. I’ve posted several questions in the past and…
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has anyone here had to get new glasses for your PWD?
My DW is getting pretty far in her AD journey. She knows me, and I got a great hug today, but conversation is pretty much me parroting her last words or offering simple observations. When I visited her at the nursing home today, I found her glasses mangled beyond repair on her dresser. I called her eye doctor's office and…
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Shaving!
I have been shaving my DH for months. Not an easy thing to do. Today my husband came out of the bathroom and was so very proud of himself. Told me he shaved! I looked at him and sure enough he shaved! He shaved his eye brows off! He found a disposable razor in the back of his drawer in his bathroom. I tried so hard not to…
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Overwhelmed(6)
I can't even begin to describe the many things I feel in dealing with a spouse with dementia,/Alzheimer's or whatever the heck this is. I feel too young for this to be my life now. I'm 64, physically active, still want to go and do things and still work full time. Unfairness of it all. He's 65 yrs. old now. It killed his…
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Instant Hospice
My DW did a fall into Stage 7 over just a few days. All of a sudden she ticked all the boxes. I had figured out how to deal with months of Stage 6, so this took me by surprise, and I had no idea how to handle it. So I called the ALZ help number, and they were quite helpful about what to do next. So then I called a local…
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Husband's bones are protruding
Memory care had a very nice Valentine's dinner for 5 couples in a back dining room on Saturday evening. Tables were beautifully set up with lots of roses/chocolates, sparkling juice and relaxing jazz music. I enjoyed being with my husband and he seemed very pleased too. The seating was set up with each of us across from…
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Hazmat readiness
Vent: This morning we had another explosion in the bathroom, DW couldn't quite make it, floor walls, etc. No need to explain any more than that to anyone here. I went into action, quickly changing into my Hazmat outfit (grubby clothes at the ready), got my Hazmat Kit (square laundry basket filled with cleaning supplies &…
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Wants to leave(1)
My DH is now afraid of our beautiful, comfortable home because he has hallucinations and delusions about people being in our yard and our home. It’s probably his main fear now, and he says he wants to get the f out of here several times a day. I tell him it’s our home and we are safe, and we aren’t going to move. I am…
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Laugh for today
DH just asked me if I would like to travel some place. I replied that I wasn’t interested in going anywhere. I then asked him if he would like to travel. He said he would like to go to Alaska and Brazil. Hmmmm I think I would like him to go there too.
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Trouble getting LO to bed at night
Hello, My mother lives in MC and I'm under the suspicion that she is staying up late into the night and not waking until 11am or later. I tested this last night; I had her over for dinner and when I dropped her off I went in to help her get her pajamas on and teeth brushed (she rarely, if ever, does these things on her…
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At the dentist
We had a small win this week. My DW hasn’t been to the dentist in over two years, between Covid and her general progression. She always took excellent care of her dental health, but with AD she actively dislikes brushing her teeth and does not do it well. I noticed some receding of her gums and was concerned. We have a…
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Problem with pants?
My DH is having a problem with pants. He says his hip hurts from the elastic on his underwear, from the jeans, from the sweatpants and now from his casual dress pants that he insisted would be better. I've tried larger sizes, but they just fall down even with a belt. I told him maybe he needs to see the dr but says no it's…