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Thank You.
Last night at 11:50PM my husband passed into the hands of God. He had been completely unresponsive to the nurses and to me all day. I talked to him all day about our lives together, about how I had loved him every day for 38 years and had been IN LOVE with him every day for 38 years, even through our darkest times. We had…
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It feels like my world is falling apart
DH has been in MC since January 23rd and I miss him terribly. The house is so lonely and nothing feels the same. I finally had my appointment with the elderlaw attorney yesterday and felt so much better and optimistic afterward. That didn't last long though. Reality isn't always easy and it isn't always pretty. She…
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Adult Day Programs
This is a related to the discussion about MC vs home care, but thought I'd start a new thread. I'm considering a day program once or twice a week for my husband so I have a chance to go to the dentist/doctor and complete some tasks around the house/yard. We will visit a program this week and am now really worried about how…
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Not sure if I can keep DH safe
i would love to hear how others handle- DH was already shuffling , gait imbalance. Etc. after two days in the hospital er her is severely weakened. Not eligible for a rehab facility, the case worker ordered a bed for the first floor of our townhouse and ordered in home physical therapy. My question is is this does the home…
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Lkrielow99
Please don't take this as a means to ridicule you. It is not. I understand that this is one of the hardest things to handle with the disease. But in your best interest, that of your husband and that of the public, you really have to get him off the road. He is way past the point where he shouldn't be driving at all. Not…
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Swallowing Issues
DH has had occasional issues with swallowing for years, but since his Alz diagnosis the difficulties are much more often. He has learned to chew slowly, eat very small bites, and it takes him twice the time to finish a meal than it does me. Last night I had been to a meting and came home, he had an episode while I was…
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So conflicted and grieving at the prospect of mc for dh
One of the things that keeps resonating with me is the statement that many caregivers realize that they have waited too long to place their LO in memory care. I don't want to make that mistake. My DH spends most of the day sleeping, and when he is not sleeping he is staring at the floor. His language skills are…
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You Won't Believe this Update.
First, I want to thank everyone who so kindly and thoughtfully offered me support yesterday when I truly thought I would collapse from pain over my husband's situation. I believe you all carried me through to today. Thank you again so much. Here's what happened today. My husband made it through the night. When I arrived at…
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Caregiver Weight Gain
I am wondering if any of you caregivers have fallen into a pattern of overeating. I know I have and gained 25 pounds this past year! I try and try to stop giving in to my cravings but nothing works. It worries me because not only am I displeased with how I look but it will likely affect my health. I am not asking for…
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Regarding remternetug
Has anyone been approached to participate in a clinical trial for this new drug? Iris
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New diagnosis in middle of major life changes.
Hello all, my husband was diagnosed last week with Alzheimer’s …The signs have been there for about 2 years, I believe my husband is in the mild stage still. Our neurologist didn’t provide a lot of information. I am struggling with some major life changes we started making a year ago. We planned to move from Michigan to…
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How do you know you LO is in the dying phase?
I just left him in the hospital for observation - impacted colon anyway he is so weak. Now can barely walk , sleeps slot. Keeps saying he is dying and I will be ok, i say” Michael- we can get busy living or we can get busy dying’ He will say I want yo get busy living When I left him tonight I felt so sad Maybe I sm not…
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MC journey off to a very rough start
After 3 nights secret work in late hours preparing for moving DW age 59 into MC, I thought I was going to get a break on move-in day (last Friday 3/1). DW has had a lot of agitation and they reassured me they are used to dealing with this. We arrived at 10am, the team assembled in her room, collected meds, signed off on…
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Ruba-dub-dub
Had a thought the other day. How willing is my wife going to be to have - insert name ( ME, Her DAD, the guy that seems to be around all the time when her husband is gone, the guy who always takes her to school, brings her home late at night, takes her food shopping etc:) help her change clothes, help her clean up after an…
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Things Changed Again..am broken.
My last post was a positive one in that my DH (Stage 6.5) turned out to be in a better position, health-wise, than was claimed by an on-call Hospice nurse. My DH's regular nurse came the next day and said my DH was not on the verge of dying, based on all his vitals, etc. Over the last week my husband stopped eating and…
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Not even sure I should post this, even though it's on topic.
I was having breakfast at a restaurant this morning, when I received a scholarship essay my granddaughter wrote. I was eating, with tears running down my cheeks. After all, it's about my granddaughter and my wife. "The key that unlocks doors, education is the most valuable asset one can have in life. Education brings…
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Need Advice for Mobility Issues
My DH was diagnosed 2 1/2 years ago. I'm not sure what stage he's in, but he's really slowing down physically. He has to get up a couple of times a night to pee, and it has become very hard for him. He sits up on the side of the bed and rocks back and forth until he gets enough momentum to stand up. I try to help but…
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This thread has been deleted
Please don't take this as a means to ridicule you. I understand that this is one of the hardest things to handle with the disease. But in your best interest, that of your husband and that of the public, you rea@Lkrielow99lly have to get him off the road. He is way past the point where he shouldn't be driving at all. Not to…
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SNF vs MC
I'm curious about the difference in the level of care between a skilled nursing facility and a memory care facility. I think my confusion is because MC counts as assisted living and I'm concerned that's not sufficient. My husband needs help with all ADLS and must be supervised at all times. To get him to eat, I need to…
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How did you find a therapist qualified to help a caregiver cope with partner's dementia?
I have reached the point where I need help. I feel that I am falling apart. There is absolutely no time when I can just sit and be me - you know, have a cup of coffee and look at the paper, or take a little nap when I am tired, or even read a book. My DH was controlling before he got sick, and now it seems that he needs to…
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I think I need a new script...
As background, my DH and I traveled a great deal over our many years as a couple, often visiting his family who live halfway around the world from us. In the last few months, he seems fixated on travel. He keeps saying he wants to do it "before he dies" or "Don't you have a 'bucket list' of things you want to do before you…
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A happy
My Mom's vase, and fresh tulips. All my best. Back to sleep.
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Declutter- how much is to much
As things progress, my daughters and I have been slowly declutterring. There is a large amount of clothing that is no longer worn or worn out. We go through and slowly remove the excess and worn items. My wife is down to a few pair of pants and tops/sweaters she wears all the time. We have several identical pairs of pants,…
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today's delusion
So, recently DW has been talking about how I've been away and she has lived alone for a long time. Today that switched(?), and she told me she had gone away. At first it sounded like she meant she had gone away for many days, but it morphed into just today. She didn't know where, why, or how she went away. She said there…
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In better times #2
We had a thread like this a few years ago. It was very popular. Post a pic of your LO during better times. I'll get it started. For some reason it gets blurry when I post it. This is Carole.
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How to get acclimated to the decline
My DH has been in what I think is a pretty steep decline lately where he can't remember something literally right after we talk about it. So therefore each question is repeated a gazillion times. I always felt that I was adapting to his changes okay, but I find myself getting much more emotional and irritable than I have…
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Adult Foster Care
I’m in Massachusetts caring for LO with Alzheimer’s full time. He’s got Medicaid and is almost approved for Adult Foster Care (AFC) which means I’d be paid a non-taxable stipend to care for him. He was evaluated as needing level II care which means he needs help with two or more ADLs and behavioral supervision. Please…
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I am a ……….
DH is unhappy with me because I made him take a shower. He said that I am a real pest. Being a well trained, knowledgeable caregiver I acknowledged his feelings and responded “yes, I’m a real hemorrhoid.” He promptly agreed with me. How is that for positive reaffirming communication?
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Leaving LO alone on the caregivers side
Wow. I woke up an hour or so ago (4AM), and thought...what would happen if something unexpected happens to me? We live alone, the two of us. What if I got in an accident while picking up groceries, what if I fall down the stairs and the EMTs come and talk to Tim...but no one else. My physically close family have keys. I…
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My heart hurts. . .
Now that I've placed my DW in MC after so many years of living in her world, day in and day out, 24/7/365 I thought I'd feel "free" now and in some ways I do but I miss her so much more than I thought I would. She's doing pretty well there and for some reason that breaks my heart even more. That she doesn't really know…