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When do you actually know when not to leave them alone anymore
My daughter wanted me to ask Nurologist this question, now understand, as I'm sure i mentioned, my wife was diagnosed 15 months ago moderate onset dementia she is fine with EVERYTHING but no driving, doesn't have any desire to cook, has short term memory , repeats same stories you all get it and gets confused easy will…
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I just wanted to have some freedom for a few hours and he was grieved
Yesterday, I proposed to my DH for us to visit a "senior center" so that we could meet other people and socialize. He was extremely resistant. I tried a different tactic and said then I would bring someone in to stay with his 4 hours a week while I spent some time with girlfriends. He didn't understand why he couldn't go…
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A New Stage Emerging
I've been feeling it coming on for a few weeks now, thinking I'm seeing changes that portend a step forward in the progression. I wasn't wrong. My DWs first instance of incontinence. She went right to bowel incontinence. Only happened once so far and according to Tam Cummings, it looks like it'll be monthly, then weekly,…
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It happened again
Well, for the second time yesterday my partner had two unexpected and unwanted visitors who came to see her at MC without checking with me first. And obviously, the "password" system the front desk told me they were putting in place had not been implemented. I walked in before lunch and...there they were. No particular…
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Seroquel
Started him on 25 mg for a week, now 25 a.m. and 25 p.m. no change. I know well increase
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/harshedbuzz made outstanding point and woke me up !!
What if I did go out and something happed to me? Accident , health issue what would happen to wife alone. Question is there anything for a care giver to have in case of this situation. Never came to mind.
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Question that Comes to Me Often
Are there caregivers on the forum who’s LO did not progress beyond mild or moderate cognitive impairment with a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s?
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Your laugh for the day
Yesterday I was trying to open a prescription bottle with a child proof lid...the kind you have to press down and turn. My right hand is still recovering from carpal tunnel surgery but isn't very strong anyway due to arthritis. I tried and tried everything and every way I knew how to open the lid! I even threw it on the…
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She wouldn't like it . . .
Wow, rearranged the living room, getting rid of things I'll never use. She wouldn't like how I set the living room up and it hits me that she will never care anymore. Sitting in the "new" liviing room looking at the changes the reality hits me, it's just me now. I love her so much and it's heartbreaking to think that I…
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Just placed my dh in Memory Care
Reading a bunch of your posts has been very helpful. When I brought him to MC he was angry, stood in the hallway and just kept repeating "I want to go home." They gave him a low dose sedative and he calmed down and I left. He's eating, sleeping and talking to other residents. They're advising I call before I vist so that…
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Praying for this to end
My DH is stage 7, still ambulatory, good appetite, vitals all okay...counting my blessings....is it wrong to wish he will pass before "it gets worse" I am so done with these stages, wondering what I will wake up to each day, crossing off each day on the calendar only to look at a new month with no end in sight...I'm so…
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Bathroom door locks
Hi, had a kind of scary thing happen on Thursday. Tim was in the master bath with the door closed. Nothing unusual so far. Except that he managed to push the button and locked the door. Not on purpose. So I went and got the wire thing that builders set on top of the door trim to unlock the door. Rather than upset him, I…
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Re-arranging the furniture in my head
My DH has been so angry and almost downright abusive in the last few weeks that we are considering placement in MC. It is such a tough call, but I realize that being ruled by the fear of what he might do next is not a tenable position. Neither is walking on eggshells. I have begun to realize that I am acting out of fear a…
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The Train Rumbles On
Since I placed my DW in MC two days ago I've realized just how strong the bubble of stress we live in day and day out, year after year is. We are always under stress with no escape from it. It almost becomes background noise. It's always there but we are so used to it that it's like living next to the railroad tracks. At…
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Medications?
I hope I have the right group, if not I apologize. My husband, diagnosed 6 years ago, has suddenly descended into Stage 6.5 Alzheimer's. He requires full time care, but up until 2 weeks ago he was still fairly coherent and responsive. He is now under Hospice care here in our home, and because he has begun to be highly…
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Handling unwarranted anger at others
My DH was upset because a truck/trailer working on a house a couple doors down was parked in front of our house. I explained that we don't own the street but, of course, that doesn't work. I was concerned that he was going to complain to them but so far he hasn't. How should I handle this if he does go and complain? Tips…
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Overnight report for first night in MC.
Last night was my DW's first night in MC and received a message a few minutes ago that she had a good night, made a new friend and they are together now. Such a relief to hear.
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Proposal to enlarge Alzheimer's classification
Here is a preview of something we may see in the near future. The Alzheimer's Association International Conference was held in August 2023 in Amsterdam. It's National Institute on Aging - Alzheimer's Association Working Group came up a proposal that could make a big difference in treatments. Quoting from the Los Angeles…
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Update: Progression
Thank you everyone for your thoughts, advice, and support. This forum is amazing. The update: at his doc appointment this morning, he tested positive for covid. I still firmly believe there's some progression but I (and his pcp) think the agression last week was probably a result of him feeling lousy and not being able to…
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I'm new here and I want out...: (
DH diagnosed one month ago and our lives are out of control. I am the caregiver, now only driver, home caretaker, as well as the target of his anger, rage, distrust, you name it. Not sure what to do, where to start. I dont even know this person really...and I now realize thats been going on for years. Here I thought we…
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Cleanliness, hygiene
So today has been tough. Everyday is a a fight about getting going, and cleanliness. He woke up early...8 ish...sister coming for lunch at noon so I could check out some things elsewhere. He didn't change his depends(always new sweats and depends are laid out for him), and then I could not get him to take a shower (last…
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Can he come home?
My sweet, loving husband (74 years old, late stage 5) came down with pneumonia last week and had to be taken to the emergency room. He experienced an emotional break and became violent to the point of breaking out of the restraints and having to be wrestled back by security. This continued for four days in the ER. The…
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Behaviors that are just slightly annoying
I thought it might be interesting to get your input on one or two of YOUR spouse’s behaviors that are just cute or a tiny bit annoying (not worth making a fuss about). I’d love to read them to see if some of my DH’s behaviors are common or unique to him. #1 EVERY TIME he walks past the trash can, he puts his hand in and…
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Two comorbidities- Alzheimer’s and Leukemia
Just as I was in the process of relocating , and setting s deadline of placing DH in memory care , the hematologist has offered a treatment for DH that would give him a 50/50 chance of remission. Problem is DH is stage 6 and does not even realize he has cancer. Yes the trestment has side effects which cciukf Aldo advance…
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Public restroom use
When there is no family restroom available and my DH uses the men's room, it often takes him an eternity. I get worried and anxious. When he finally emerges he'll tell me that he had a lot of poop and it took forever to clean up. Is there any appropriate way for me to help him in a public restroom?
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Article on discrimination against caregivers - Stigma and worse
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Friday 9:30A
Officially moving DW to MC. Bittersweet. Looking forward to being alone, I have lots of good friends so I won't be completely alone. Coming and going when I want. Want to go flyfishing again or just stand by a stream and listen to the water and the wind in trees. I've been down this dementia road for a long time so in all…
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Yet another post on driving…
I’m getting no where on this. This in a way is another vent . I’m at wits end. I’m looking for a magic answer where there isn’t one. Searching anyway. Since DH was discharged from hospital he has been doing so much better. At the time of hospitalization I thought he was stage 5. He is back to maybe mid stage 4. But he has…
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No empathy for years and then it appears
My DH has never had alot of compassion or shown much empathy to me or anyone else. I have learned to live with it. On Tuesday, we had to put our dog to sleep. My DH did not want to be there so my son took him to lunch and a haircut. I was worried he would be asking me where our fur Baby was over and over. Instead, he not…
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Laundry smell
So, some background. Last night I went out for two hours with two friends, their husbands too DH out. We all had a bite ti eat. The guys were great and out my DH in the middle so he would always be part of the conversation, they took him home when we started to seem anxious and texted us when they were headed home. He got…