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Hello all, new to this
Hi everyone. My DH was diagnosed with VD within last few months. Short term memory impacted and difficulty with organization. Has gotten "off track" when walking the dogs but recognizes that and can make his way back. Consistency in his routine really helps. Overall he's pleasant. Just wanted to say hello. I've found…
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A funny story
This forum is wonderful for those of us who struggle with caring for our LO. But I find that there are no funny stories here. We often focus on the hardships, but today, I want to share a story that I consider funny. Last year, my DW was able to do her own Christmas shopping. She bought me a sweater online and when it…
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Some people just don't get it
Most friends and family members have some idea of how to relate to my DH who has dementia. But there are a few who don't understand they can't have the same kind of conversation they used to have with him. They keep correcting him when he mixes up details, or says something totally nonsensical. Even had a visiting nurse…
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I Can Buy Myself Flowers
What a rough Christmas for me emotionally. DW not sure where she is a lot of the time, hard 5 hour drive getting her to her family on what may be the last Christmas I make that drive with her, and she got everyone a present but me. I took her shopping and realized later the gift I thought was for me…wasn’t. I have been…
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Rapid Progressive Dementia/Covid19 Related
MY DW passed on 12/06. After a relatively short, but intensely difficult journey. We did not have a confirmed diagnosis, as the tests were all negative and normal for her age. Her health eas rest of a healthy 45 year old, had not had any hospitalizations, rarely sick with a cold. Sometimes allergies. P. She wa sky…
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No Support From My Kids
As expected, this was the worst Christmas ever. My DW goes to the Alzheimer’s Activity Centre 7 hrs a day 5 days a week , however , they are now closed for the Christmas Holidays… reopening on the 2nd Jan 2025 as such It has been very tough for me. Keeping her occupied is brutal . Watching TV for hours is all she does and…
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Is this a stupid question?
But if some one has short term memory loss and is age 85 does that mean AD or just old age? This year, DH short term memory loss has got worse, seemingly quite quickly. I'm very depressed by this as I feel I'm losing him mentally. Is this the start of AD?
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How do I get a diagnosis for a spouse?
I am new to this site. I have noticed behaviors for about a year in my husband. Many of the issues you mention on this site are the behaviors I observed. I have a friend whose husband had Alzheimer’s and she has been so helpful. My husband will never admit he has symptoms. How do I get a diagnosis? He does allow me to go…
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Did the Antidepressant make my DH worse? Need some advice please.
My DH was diagnosed 4 years ago. Back then he was able to drive, run his computer, use his smart phone and manage the TV selector. Fast forward to now, he is incapable of doing any of the above, thinks there are people sitting in our house. Last Sunday I came home the front door was wide open and I spotted him walking up…
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Walking on eggshells
Dh has young onset and I feel like I'm losing my mind. Feels like I'm constantly walking on eggshells so that I don't say or do the wrong thing. And like I'm constantly running interference between him and two oldest kids. He has very little patience with them and says that they're constantly giving him attitude or talking…
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Hours of PCA care
I remember my grandmother had 24 hour aides from Medicaid or Medicare in her last years of dementia (1989-1993). I was not too aware of what was happening at the time but I recall certain facts. My aunt lived with her and was her FT carer…did not have a job..and GM still got round the clock aides. I am in the same boat as…
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Haven't yet figured out dx, but new symptom
…has cropped up. Brief history: DH was struggling. MRI in Oct 2023 showed brain shrinkage. Initial dx: moderate cognitive decline (13 of 30 MOCA), suspect Parkinsons, and Alz. In March, Speech therapist suspected Ataxia and so far indications seem correct dx. Neurologist is waiting on Mayo Clinic results of genetic…
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How long does it take for a loved one to adjust to memory care
It has been 5 weeks since my DH was placed in memory care. Every time I go, he says things like, "when can I go home, I want to be with you, I want you to take care of me." I hate this. I say things like, "the doctor says you need to be here to feel better." It breaks my heart so much I don't want to go. I go home…
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Police officer called me at 5:30 am
My guy was diagnosed with mci 3 years ago. We lived together until 6 months ago. I told him he needed to move back to his condo. He is able to perform all of the daily living tasks. I felt we were no longer partners, but I was definitely his memory, decision maker, bill payer, etc. I informed his son I no longer wanted to…
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I didn't plan for this:
I am a fairly good planner. I was a project manager, so I know planning for things that can go wrong is wise. I have not planned for the case where I die before my DW. We have wills, POAs, and family members assigned to take over health care and financial matters. However, I have not planned for someone to take over the…
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How do you do it?
I know I have written posts before. I'm sorry to keep writing, but I don't know really where else to turn. I'm hoping someone has advice. All these nights where we go through the "we need to leave" and the need for movers have completely worn me out. I have explained over and over. He is convinced that he had no say in…
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People don't understand
This is mostly a rant.. I saw a neighbor last night that I don't know well. When I explained who I was, he said that he knows my husband (stage 6) and "talks to him all the time." My husband spends time on the front porch during warm weather (it's been cold for the last 3 months) and talks to people who pass by. I…
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Anger seems to last longer and longer
Last night, and a couple of nights ago, my DH started again with wanting to go to the "other house" and not understanding how all of our things could have gotten to this house. Of course there is no other house, but he gets angry and tells me that I am horrible and he would never treat me like this. It goes on and on, but…
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Just waiting for this day to be over!
A little rant to save my sanity! I have been patient all day…made a special trip into town (hour drive round trip) so DH could go to Ross to look a shoes (he has approx 50 pairs of shoes in his closet, mostly unworn & still in the boxes). He woke me up at 4:00 am to see what time we should leave, even though we had done a…
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Just venting
I check in here from time to time, although I seldom post. I’m posting today only to vent a little bit. I’m frustrated, exhausted, angry, depressed — all the things we all experience now and then. My poor DH. I try so hard to keep things light, to laugh and tease the way I always have, to exercise patience (not my best…
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Sleeping a lot
In the last month or so, my wife has started to sleep a lot more—yesterday she woke up at 3PM, even though she went to sleep around 11 PM (and slept soundly through the night). It is now almost 1PM and she is still asleep, again after going to sleep at around 11. Some of this may be due to her medications (although there…
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My DH is gone
My DH left us this morning. His passing was relatively peaceful, but there was a six-day buildup to it, so I feel wiped out. As he was leaving the nursing home to go to the funeral home, all the staff lined up to see him out. It brought on fresh tears. My DH was a wonderful husband and father, and we will miss him…
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I’m Not OK But It’s All Gonna Be Alright…
song by Jelly Roll for those struggling and especially those in Stage 8 💜 https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Qop5XLgwkNc
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My Step Dad had a stroke.
2024 is ending the way it began for me and our family. My Cancer diagnosis, placing my DH in memory care, my DH passing away in August and now in November my 90 year old Step-Dad had a stroke. He has no children so I’m trying to help as much as I can. Please continue to pray for our family. Love you all. 🙏 💜
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What's my identity tonight?
I love my BF like no other. (45yo eoa) But I freaking HATE this disease. Normally I'm beautiful and he lo lo lo lo loves me (gotta love speech aphasia). But a few weeks ago when I was trying to get him settled for bed. I picked my battle as he was trying to remove the sheet and comforter from the bed i got up and came to…
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Saddened by signs of progression and feelings of inadequacy
We had a nice Christmas but it was evident that DH's disease is progressing. He can usually do a good job of hiding his confusion when the kids/grandkids are present, but that wasn't the case yesterday. And he's really tired today from the effort that it took. Although he's still in the early stages of the disease and I…
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Season's Greetings
Hi friends. I just wanted to stop by to let you know I still think of you all the time. I hope you can find at least a little enjoyment through the holidays, and I wish everyone a better new year. It might seem like an odd thing to say, but I miss you guys and gals, and I know I'm better off not being here every day. Two…
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Got Hysterical
Not sure why this happened. My DW was at the Activity Center this morning when the doorbell suddenly rang . A couple , who were friends of ours for years , showed up today ( Christmas Eve) with a beautiful tray of Christmas sweets. We had not seen or heard from them in maybe 3 years. As they were leaving we shook hands…
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Sleeping and Restlessness
I’m helping with the care of my mother with dementia. My father is the main caregiver but I step in often to give him a chance to rest and reset. Mom has recently started getting up multiple times throughout the night and refuses to go back to bed. As you can imagine both my parents are exhausted the next day and mom is…
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Well, That Didn’t Go Well
Oh, ya’ll. I had such success in getting someone in to clean the house as the cover to getting someone eyes on my DW while I work. That’s just one day and I’ve found I’ve run myself ragged trying to balance working from home, going to the office for a few hours, racing home, etc. Totally unsustainable. So, I tried today to…