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In better times #2
We had a thread like this a few years ago. It was very popular. Post a pic of your LO during better times. I'll get it started. For some reason it gets blurry when I post it. This is Carole.
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How to get acclimated to the decline
My DH has been in what I think is a pretty steep decline lately where he can't remember something literally right after we talk about it. So therefore each question is repeated a gazillion times. I always felt that I was adapting to his changes okay, but I find myself getting much more emotional and irritable than I have…
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Adult Foster Care
I’m in Massachusetts caring for LO with Alzheimer’s full time. He’s got Medicaid and is almost approved for Adult Foster Care (AFC) which means I’d be paid a non-taxable stipend to care for him. He was evaluated as needing level II care which means he needs help with two or more ADLs and behavioral supervision. Please…
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I am a ……….
DH is unhappy with me because I made him take a shower. He said that I am a real pest. Being a well trained, knowledgeable caregiver I acknowledged his feelings and responded “yes, I’m a real hemorrhoid.” He promptly agreed with me. How is that for positive reaffirming communication?
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Leaving LO alone on the caregivers side
Wow. I woke up an hour or so ago (4AM), and thought...what would happen if something unexpected happens to me? We live alone, the two of us. What if I got in an accident while picking up groceries, what if I fall down the stairs and the EMTs come and talk to Tim...but no one else. My physically close family have keys. I…
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My heart hurts. . .
Now that I've placed my DW in MC after so many years of living in her world, day in and day out, 24/7/365 I thought I'd feel "free" now and in some ways I do but I miss her so much more than I thought I would. She's doing pretty well there and for some reason that breaks my heart even more. That she doesn't really know…
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Has anyone heard from Jo C.?
I hope she's doing OK.
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The fine art of complaining by King Boo
https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/155111#Comment_155111?utm_source=community-search&utm_medium=organic-search&utm_term=King+Boo
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rolling my eyes, talking to myself
When DW repeats herself; or says "Maybe you told me this, but I can't remember"; or says "Sorry to interrupt"; or "Did you know?"; or "Do you remember?", I say to myself, "Yes", or, "Oh please, not again!", and I roll my eyes when DW isn't looking. It's a minor way to vent without getting angry with her.
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Update: Am I going crazy?
I want to thank everyone here for all the kindness and concern. It restores my feeling of being part of this strange thing called the human race. I have learned so much from you. Things have taken a turn that I think might be informative for all of us. I have pasted it as an answer to some of you but thought it better to…
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First signs of trouble, concerns at MC
Was there at the MC checking on my DW and I noticed she had soiled herself so I took her to her room, cleaned and changed her but when I was cleaning her I noticed some fairly significant skin breakdowns between her cheeks. Her pants and shirt were wet so I went to change those and there were no clean clothes in her room…
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Medicaid divorce
Someone suggested that I get a medicaid divorce to protect my assets and qualify my DH for medicaid. Has anyone ever done this or is it an obsolete idea?
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In a safe place
DH lost his wedding rings about 6 weeks ago. We searched every place possible without success. Yesterday they mysteriously showed up. They had been in a very safe place……………inside his Bible. 😇 Ah, bless his heart.
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Boorriinnggg
Boredom has become a big issue with my LO. She has no interest in any of her previous interests. (My teacher aunt would kill me for that sentence). Early on there were long walks on the local beach, visiting local attractions, she had an interest in cake decorating (took several courses with granddaughter, best part was…
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Startling Behaviour
So - my DH (probably at Stage 4 or 5- hard to tell for sure) is in the car with me after we picked up our 10 year old granddaughter from school. There was a lot more traffic than usual, and suddenly he started trying to get out of the car because he had a job to do to save a bus. I talked him down until we dropped off our…
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angel neighbor
[Sorry, this is a bit long.] I had minor outpatient surgery last week. (I'm fine, thanks.) When I made the surgery appointment, I was comfortable leaving DW alone in the house. However, within the subsequent two weeks she has reached a stage where she got very anxious if I were not home and fearful she would never see me…
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New to this
I'm new to this forum New to the world of caring for a spouse with Dementia. We are just beginning our journey. Is there someone who is also just beginning? My spouse still does all his own ADLs. His deficit is remembering and language. He is aware his memory is fading and it frustrates him. He can no longer carry on a…
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Alzheimer's or severe PTSD
Hi, Not sure if my wife is getting Alzheimer's or what I know her Grandmother had it. She comes up with delusional thoughts that my parents hate her and conspired with her daughter to ruin her through Tik Tok and just makes up things that are not true. Any thoughts?
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Anyone else here with hypoglycemia?
The reason I'm writing about this is if you do have hypoglycemia, and you have Medicare A&B, a CGM (continuous glucose monitor) is now covered. After spending a few days in the hospital because I was not having symptoms when I had low blood sugar (dangerous), my doctor was trying to get a special consideration for coverage…
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The whole cloak-and-dagger thing is getting to me: a vent
I am so grateful to have this place to just get all of these worries out of my head while I'm among friends, so to speak. At this point we have put my DH on the waitlist for a MC we have chosen. We have been told that we are second in line for a spot there. It had been a long, hard road for me to get to this point. He has…
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Almost Lost it This AM
So sometime during the night LO got up to use bathroom. This morning I go to his room to get him ready for his shower. Walk in the bathroom and it is wet. I thought maybe an accident. Then I hear the water running in one of the sinks; it had been on for who knows how long. The entire bathroom was flooded! I just stood…
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How to get my DH to accept a caregiver while I am getting a break
First of all, thank you all so much for giving me wake-up advice last week about getting out for a break. I really needed it. I love that you all are brutely honest in a loving way and get me to think a different way. I am truly the frog in the boiling water and didn't realize just how complacent I have been, not wanting…
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Constantly crying
Hi I’m new to this group and also new to being a caregiver to my wife who has been diagnosed with YOAD. She seems to just start crying. This happens a few times a day. I will take her in my arms to comfort her. When I ask her why she is crying, every time she says she doesn’t know. I want to be there for her but feel so…
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Lost rings
DH lost his wedding rings about 6 weeks ago. We searched and searched without success. Mysteriously they appeared today. DH found them in a very safe place ……… his Bible.😇
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Am I going crazy?
My husband, aged 78 and diagnosed 6 years ago, has suddenly taken a severe turn for the worse. He has been in home Hospice care for the last 2 months and now is, as the nurses say, "taking that final turn". He is incontinent, has nighttime agitation controlled with drugs, and sleeps almost all day. Within the last 5 days…
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Feeling sucker punched yet again
A couple of days ago, after talking about the family he grew up with, my DH told me I was “like family” which gave me pause. And because I have a very hard time ignoring the off-the-wall stuff he says sometimes, I asked him if he recognizes me as his wife, to which he replied, “It’s complicated. I was married before.”…
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Message from the head nurse just now.
My DW brought her friend Patty who usually doesn't participate in activities with her. She is such a bright light to others and we are so glad she is with us and in the environment best for her. She is doing great!
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What do we talk about?
Does anyone run out of things to talk about with your loved one? I can’t discuss things that need decisions, or things that might upset him. I can’t discuss my work, he doesn’t follow it or it upsets him. He doesn’t leave the house much, so he doesn’t have much to add. It makes me sad, and I miss who he used to be. We both…
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a move to MC and the end
My DH went to MC recently and the emptiness set in. Such an uncomfortable feeling to not have him home. I looked forward to going to see him everyday. I think he did know me,,,i would sit with him (barely mobile anymore) and I’d “visit” with little response, but it felt good to hold his hand, tell him i Loved him, get a…
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New and struggling
This is my first post. Not sure what to expect, but here it goes. My wife recently received a diagnosis of psychosis and vascular dementia, moderate with agitation. The agitation is mostly direct d towards me because she seems to view me as the villain of her story out to get her. It's led to some troubling behavior,…