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We can do this!
I know some professional caregivers who say that if they had to do this without time off or vacation time, they would go insane. Yet we who do it 24 hours a day, seven days a week without help or respite, can go on this way for years and years. While watching someone we love deteriorate physically and mentally day by day.…
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This is so damn hard
Sigh. My poor DW. She so much wants to tell me things and express her thoughts and she just cannot say it. Seeing her struggle and trying so hard is just killing me right now. I know it's not rational, but I wish that I could make it all better. Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamnit!
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The state investigated last week's incident and says my DH has to move...help
In my last post I told how DH had groped a female resident at his MC. Now the state has stepped in and says he can no longer stay there. The social said she told them they were willing to keep him and wanted to keep him but the state is adament. When I asked her how long we had to find another facility, she said she was…
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Memory Care Facility for Mom
Thank to all who replied to my first post. Great ideas and insights. I do have another question as my family navigates through this . When and if my dad decides mom needs to be moved to a memory care facility , does anyone know if Medicare will cover any of this expenses of this? I am assuming not, but am just trying to…
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Still at home
Hello. I’m reaching out because I’m wondering if you can make a recommendation for me. I need to speak to someone that can help me in managing the situation with my mother’s Alzheimer’s. I mean managing it from a psychological Perspective to benefit her. And me. And my husband. As an example… My mother simply refuses to…
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Reposting...
My 75 year old wife was recently diagnosed with FTD. I am 77 myself and in compromised physical health due to my Vietnam war injuries. We sold our home and moved into a retirement facility which made life less complicated. But the issues I face caring for my wife are almost more than I can manage. I do not dare leave her…
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DH bothering neighbor with small children
DH has now become fixated with a neighbor family with 3 small children. Their house has very open picture windows and he’s walked over there to talk to them, apparently looking in the window and inviting the little ones to come over to our house. He likes people and likes kids and likes to have people come over. He’s…
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One diaper change away
I'm one gross diaper change away from screaming. If I could run away I would. How do others handle this horrible job without throwing up?
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I don’t know what to do!!
My mother will be 70 years old and my sister and I started seeing changes happening with my mom. We thought it was because my our brother passed away at age 38 and threw my mom in a depression. But it’s been four years and my mother‘s behavior is scaring us. She started hearing things seeing things tasting things smelling…
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I’m burned out and don’t know what to do
my DH has undiagnosed dementia and steadfastly refuses to see his doctor. This has been going on for more than three years. DH is 75 years old and is healthy except for his memory problems. My son comes over three nights a week to support me but he works full time so I’m pretty much on my own. I can’t hire a caregiver…
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Moving mom to a Memory Care sooner rather than later?
I had asked earlier about trying to make the right decision on when put to my mom intoa memory care facility. A lot of replies stated the sooner the better. Can someone elaborate on that? Why is sooner better? Thank you
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Adult teenager
I barely survived raising my own kids.....now my husband with Alzimers has become a defiant teenager. I am not wired to deal with this!!! Been a really bad day in my household. God give me strength!
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She is gone
My lovely, wonderful, brilliant, public spirited wife died yesterday. She was 73. and had had Alzheimer's for 15 years. I described our journey in these pages and the end was peaceful. I held her hand as her breathing went shallower and shallower and finally stopped . Our two daughters were with us. She was as lovely as…
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Violent spouse with dementia
My D husband gets agitated and so do I and we argue all the time. When I think I am helping I am just aggravating him even more. Just today put on pants backwards and refused to change them He pushed me away and I fell. Lesson learned, let him fail, try to leave for good but tied financially Any one can tell me how to…
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Proof of dementia for MC
Do I have to document that my spouse has dementia to put him in MC facility
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My family needs suggestions
My 83 Yr mother was diagnosed about 4 years ago. She was slowly progressing . My dad who is 88 takes care of her and they still live my childhood home . Dad recently said he needed help with mom. We found a caregiver to come 3 times a week and helps with laundry , cooking and bathing for mom . We thought all was going…
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Moving mom this week
I am moving my mom to memory care this week and it is causing an extreme amount of anxiety. She lives with my brother who does not give her the care she needs and who is not on board with this decision at all. I cannot take care of her full time so although she is at about a 2 (I would say 3) caregiving level, I have…
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Thank You! And looking for ideas...
My siblings and I are caring for our mother. She has had Alzheimer's for a few years, but although I am learning so much in this forum (Thanks to all of you!!), I don't know what stage she is in. Recently our Dad has been hospitalized following a severe stroke and we see lots of rapid changes in our mom. We have home help…
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Keeps wanting to go get hair cut
My husband had his hair cut two weeks ago and keeps saying he needs a haircut, should I just let him go again? I remind him that he just went but he doesn't believe me
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Alzheimer’s and stomach issues
Hello all, My mother continues to battle constipation, nausea, and gas on and off. Her appetite has definitely decreased, although she was never a big eater to begin with. We continue to encourage fluids and she eats mostly high fiber foods, but she is still having these issues more than not. I also give her Metamucil…
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Lithium to treat AD?
Today a front-page article in the Washington Post is titled "Lithium a potential for treating Alzheimers." The gist of the research with mice is that Lithium plays a key role in the brain function. Their research shows that amyloid plaques trap and remove Lithium, which is bad thing. They provided mice with Lithium orate…
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The conflicting emotions...
The past two weeks have been a continual decline. My DH is sleeping more each day. A month ago, DH started each day with a quarter mile walk with the walker at sunrise, and we could take car rides and go for wheelchair walks at a local park. Three weeks ago, the anxiety of the car overwhelmed him, so we just did his short…
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What to tell my wife about hiring help
It seems that the time has come for me to hire a home health care worker/companion for my wife. I would estimate she has reached the middle part of stage 5 at this point. I was thinking of having someone come over twice a week to start, for 4 hour visits. I know she will resist—how can I get her to agree—what will I tell…
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Nail cutting
Does anyone have suggestions on how to bet my DW to cut her toe nails? She is not a fan of getting a pedicure.
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Having one disaster after another with my LW
I’m m new at all this since February ‘25. I read the wrong week on my calendar this morning and went took her to her hip doctor and missed a very important EMG test at Mayo Clinic. I’m having trouble keeping up my own health. The diet is suffering too. My LW broke her hip a month ago after developing Foot Drop. So, now I’m…
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Caregiving for the Caregiver
My MIL has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. It has been slow in its progression (15 years since initial diagnosis). My DH’s step-father is the primary caregiver and has done a fantastic job. However, my MIL is now firmly in Stage 4. We want to support DH’s step-father as best we can…but we don’t want to be pushy or make…
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How to support mom?
We moved my dad to memory care this week after a stroke one month ago. My sister and I are physically, mentally, and emotionally drained, but also want to be able support my mom (82 yrs) with this life altering event. I call and she’s sobbing but won’t talk to me and just tells me she has to go. As exhausted as we are, I…
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Losing his grip
Is it typical for PWD to begin dropping things? My DH can’t seem to hold onto anything anymore. Drinks are especially hard and when he drops them, his clothes need to be changed, floor cleaned. Does anyone have a suggestion for a good adult style sippy cup? I need to do something different and need/welcome your help. Thank…
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Fall Detection Devices?(1)
Hi all. Now I'm looking into fall detection devices. Some of them seem to have all these services I don't need. IF I am running to the store for 45 minutes (which I can still do), I want him to be wearing a device to monitor falls. I do not need a GPS for location (he's not that mobile, doesn't wander, and I'm usually…
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Husband Proofing my home.
I childproofed my home when my kids were little and never in a million years did I think that I would have to do this to protect my lo. I just padlocked the ladder so he can’t climb up on the roof. He’s 73 and too old to be on the roof and his dementia has been costing me thousands of dollars in repairs after he “fixes”…