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Medicaid Funeral Assistance May Help Pay for Funeral Costs
https://www.elderlawanswers.com/medicaid-funeral-assistance-may-help-pay-for-funeral-costs-19493
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DH is starting to withdraw from social engagements
A week ago today, two men from our church who have been friends for years invited DH out for lunch and a drive afterward. They were going to get pizza. DH accepted the invitation readily but when it came time to go, he had forgotten and said he wasn't up to it. He refused to go. He also didn't really remember who the men…
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Taking all his clothes off
Every time my dh goes to bathroom he now thinks he has to take ALL his clothes off! He says he’s freezing , so I have to put several layers of clothing on him, then he has to go bathroom, and getting all clothes off, then back on. I don’t understand the why, but he insists. Not only do I put layers of clothing on him, I…
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What now, husband refused to see attorney
I'm so disappointed. Husband and I had appointment with elder law attorney today, and I had to cancel. Husband refused to go. Attorneys office said to call back and they will try to do a conference call. I'm just sick of it all.
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Good read on bvFTD
https://neurosciencenews.com/bvftd-brain-sagging-22351/
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MC logistics issue
My partner is withdrawing in MC because she's reacting negatively to some new residents. Has anyone else had this kind of issue? I went in to check on my partner yesterday because twice in a week, she hasn't wanted to get up, get dressed, or leave her room. They had called me concerned that she was ill, but when I got…
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Memory care placement, one year ago today
I placed my wife in MC January 25th 2022. It was encouragement and advice from people on this forum that gave me the strength to do it, and I'm sorry I've not reported back here for several months. So to recap the last year, placement has worked out about as well as I could have ever hoped. Below I'll go into more detail.…
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Zauberflote. Off topic
Was wondering if you would be able to share name of your magic black box for battery. Would like to check into it. Thank you
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not sure where I go from here
My DH passed away from Alzheimer's on December 6. I got through everything with the help of our 5 kids. I also got through Christmas and New Year's with their help. I think I was numb. The kids and I spent his last week with him. We had air mattresses everywhere. I am thankful we were able to be with him. Got to hold him…
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My gentle DH becoming more afraid/aggressive
Hi, my DH is still afraid and he’s gotten aggressive towards some caregivers. The staff talked to me about it in front of my DH. He looked so sad and said so clearly “I’m sorry.” Broke my heart. I know dementia patients still hear and understand things like this. Anyway, they upped his meds a little and one…
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Checklist for diagnosis appointment
My wife of almost 40 years almost certainly has significant cognitive impairment. Enormous short-term memory loss, inarticulacy, huge challenges with executive function, as in, being almost incapable of using iPhone and laptop any more. (Some days better than others, which I'm learning is "normal"). Next week we have the…
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Stunning Death In Assisted Living With False Reporting
Stunning and horrific - the penalties for the facility were so low that they seem ridiculous. I feel so bad for the family who have to bear this: https://www.yahoo.com/news/were-told-mothers-death-peaceful-045500616.html J.
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Little heartbreaks
As you my remember, my DH is in the early stages of Vascular Dementia. Yesterday, out of the blue, DH asked me, "what do we use pita bread for?" DH used to make hummus, babaganoush, tabbuoleh, and I made falafel and a wonderful Syria stew and also a chopped spinach and walnut salad. We hosted many Middle Eastern meals. And…
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DENIED by Medicaid
As expected, Saturday, the letter arrived denying benefits for my poor husband in long-term care, in Hospice care and re-certified after 3 months to remain in Hospice care. Due to my father's death, 3 years ago today, and his wealth divided among my siblings of which we had no knowledge, Medicaid took it upon itself to…
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When placing in memory care is a nightmare
I’m curious how many with spouses/partners in small town facilities are still facing nightmares of Covid staffing shortage? My husband’s director often works the floor instead of directing, the RCC is pulled to do other jobs, the med tech position is substituted by a “trained” aide. The aides in my state do not have to be…
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nights are the worst
Peewee has started to wake up confused. Sunday morning Peewee woke up around 3 am and asked me whose house he was in mine or his. I told him we are in our house and he looked at me like I was from the moon. I told him that we are married and we are in our home. Peewee then asked me if we were married to each other which I…
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Are YOU safe to drive?
I think we all know that as people age, the chances for driving safely go down. That's just the way it is. Illness, hearing difficulties, reaction time, and vision all contribute to safe/unsafe driving. I think I still drive without a problem, as I'm sure you do too. So what kind of new laws would you support to keep the…
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Opinions Please(1)
The hospital said that in the next few days they will recommend DH return to memory care or geripsych. He was at a geripsych hospital for 4 weeks 2 months ago. That facility does not allow visitors. Do you think it would be best for him to return there since they know him and will be able to see first hand how far he has…
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Anticipatory Grief counseling
Yesterday I had had my first session with an anticipatory grief counselor (free through a local Hospice center) She was so helpful. We talked about the importance of self care (which she said i could teach her about haha) as well as human emotions like envy (I look at my married friends with envy for how they are enjoying…
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Labeling kitchen cabinets
My husband searches thru the cabinets just about every time he is in the kitchen. I try not to say anything as it seems like it upsets him. But yesterday he said that he can't remember where anything is. I asked him what he thought of me labeling the cabinets. While he was sleeping, I did one to make sure he could read the…
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Grief/ Homecare/ Virtual Support Groups
Hi Everyone, I introduced myself a couple of months ago and then never came back. I've been in overdrive trying my best to prepare for this change in our lives. I've made some progress, but mostly I am in a waiting game which I am not good at. I feel so helpless. DH received an original diagnosis of possible Vascular…
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Loosing Us, We, Our
I’ve noticed lately that I am using Me,My and I a lot more and omitting Us, We and Our. The longer this Alzheimer’s journey progresses, the less I feel married and the more I feel like a “ married single”. I (see there I go again) suppose it happens rather gradually as we take on more responsibility and also detach our…
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Moment of Clarity
I have not been able to understand anything my DH has been saying since his UTI first presented two weeks ago. Today, after he was fighting with the nurses who were trying to clean him up from his BM in the bed I came back into the room. He looked at me and said clear as day “I’m so sorry l’m putting you through this.” And…
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Being oblivious to other people
Many of you post about your LO being oblivious to how much work you do or how much toll is taken on you. It is not only PWDS who are oblivious. My 91 yo frail neighbor, who does not have dementia, is also oblivious. Yesterday I got called twice by her Life Alert company to help them gain entry, because she had fallen…
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What if it's not dementia?
Hi my friends, I've not posted much lately, but I've still been following all of you. Today I'm just writing to try to organize my feelings and thoughts and I suppose look for support as I continue on this journey after all these years. Quick review- DH is about to turn 59, symptoms first noticed about 15 years ago. Quit…
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For Lane(1)
Info re this was published in the U of A alumni publication. The story is specifically about Robin Bolt. Your take??? Judith
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Belsomra
Anyone try Belsomra for sundowning? Along with other things I can try, an Alzheimer’s Care Consultant suggested I run it by my husbands doctor. I’ve been living on 3 hours sleep, more or less, sleep a night because my husband goes to bed at 8:00 and is up two hours later for the night.
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Rapid Decline(5)
DH went from driving and cooking to incontinent and nonsensical speech in less than 3 months. We are still in the hospital as they try to figure out what is happening. Treatment for UTI has not changed his behavior. He has regressed so much. Watches cartoons now. Can’t speak a sentence that makes any sense. On top of it,…
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New to this forum(2)
Good day all. My name is Joe and I just joined the forum. I posted a lengthy remark about my situation and maybe it is on my profile. I haven't checked to see. My basic situation is that I am a caregiver for my wife who has some kind of unspecified dementia and it has recently gotten really bad and and tomorrow I will be…
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Help in getting DH out of bed
My DH sleeps 16 plus hours a day. He is at moderate stage. I would like to see if he would benefit from a day program. However the day programs that are available want you to be there by 10:00 AM at the latest. This is near impossible to get him up, dressed etc.. this early. DH becomes very combative when I have tried to…