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Loving Words
DH tells me he loves me repetitively (like every 5 to 10 minutes). It feels smothering to me. Is there an attempt on his part to make certain that I am always here to take care of him? Is it fear on his part? Does he genuinely mean it? Is he just stuck in repetition? He says “Did I tell you today how much I love you?” If I…
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Checking in(4)
It's been awhile since I posted anything. It seems every time I sit down to write something I get interrupted...usually DH comes to see what I'm doing. Things are going fairly well. DH continues to progress with more confusion and little short term memory. Now even his memories from his childhood are starting to fade away.…
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Fingers crossed, hoping elder law attorney helps
I've only been a member a few weeks on this forum, and it seems that those of you that have dealt with caregiving for a spouse with dementia for several years all give same advice. Contact an elder law attorney. My husband and I have an appointment the 24th of this month. I hope I get answers to a lot of questions. And…
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communication phases
I was with my brother last night listeing to him. He went on for about an hour, talking about not being in his house, wanting to go to his mother’s/father’s house, wanting to take a plane trip…He just went on and on. I was able to understand a lot of the wirds, but I noticed that he was slurring his words and running them…
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A few tips
I’ve done a few things during DH’s hospitalization that have helped a bit and may help someone you love. 1. Music- 5 songs on my phone that I play when he is about to get a procedure 2. If he refuses to take meds, I take my “meds” and he will sometimes follow my lead. 3. The nurses let me use the scanner to scan is bladder…
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Not sure if I had shared this before.
https://acl.gov/CaregiverStrategy https://acl.gov/sites/default/files/RAISE_SGRG/NatlStrategyFamCaregivers_ActionsSCO.pdf https://nashp.org/raise-act-state-policy-roadmap-for-family-caregivers/
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Hospice on board
DH has been in memory care since mid August as I could no longer take care of him after he broke his ankle and also was doubly incontinent. I had been taking care of him for 4 1/2 yrs. with no outside help. Last week he once again was non- responsive and slumped to the side and drooling. They took him to the ER...2nd trip…
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Scooterr(1)
Hoping your well, I miss your posts. I know things are hard and hectic. Stewart
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MIL in hospital
My MIL has been in the hospital for the past 2 weeks due to her continuing falling down and hurting herself. The other day we had lunch with a couple of friends who were asking DH questions about his mother which is alright, but his answers are completely wrong. Like, what happened to your mother? His answer is, someone…
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Hospital hell
So, DH went by ambulance this morning to ER for blood in his urine. They are admitting him but we have been waiting in the hallway of the ER waiting for a bed for TEN hours. It’s hard enough on me let alone a patient with Alzheimer’s. Argh!!!!
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Just need to talk to my friends (185)
Happy New Year! Be sure to read the last posts on 184. Ron's going home today. Be careful what you do today - you know whatever you do today, you'll do all year long. It's a pretty morning here. Girls just decided it was feed day and most of them made the trek out to the feeding area. Haven't seen little Eve yet. I've been…
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DH can't talk or understand
I'm looking for tips from those of you that are dealing with a partner that can no longer talk or comprehend what you say. My DH can say a handful of words from time to time, but they make no sense. Most of his words are gibberish. If I say something, he has no clue what I have said, like I am speaking another language. We…
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Cat laxative
I realize when I post here, it usually has to do with fecal affairs.This one was epic. I give the cat a small amount of lactulose in liquid form. I kept it in the kitchen and everything went really well until a few days ago. I came downstairs and saw the bottle in the fridge, half empty and my heart sunk. I realized that…
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Sort of on topic , Netflix movie
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The Alz Connected website is being upgraded
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Placement before talking with Elder Care lawyer
A facility I'm considering has available space. The earliest appointment I can get with an ECL is the end of January. If the situation warrants, is it better to wait for consultation with lawyer or proceed with placement options. As best I can tell care will be private pay. Wish there was more available information to help.
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Foot Hurting (Left)
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Memories(3)
They say stop and smell the roses, so today I stopped and thought about my life with DW I met her more than 50 yeas ago, a little wisp of a girl with a brilliant mind and a titanium backbone , or as my mother called it "a whim of iron". Unstylish to be sure, a math major with two scientists for parents. But I was no…
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Visiting physician service
As DH’s mobility has continued to decline it is becoming more challenging to get him out of the house to medical appointments. There is a visiting physicians group near us that provides in-home medical care for persons with dementia or physical disabilities. The MDs in this group are internal medicine specialists, and they…
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Viscous Cycle
DH in memory care with Covid and UTI. He’s refusing to take his meds and now he’s peeing blood and his behavior is getting increasingly erratic. We tried crushing the meds putting them in pudding, liquids, nothing worked. He won’t take the antibiotics and willl not take anything for his psychosis. He just keeps getting…
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A little more than 3 months later
Happy new year to all of you ! Yes, I feel your perplexity... how can it really be happy ? At list, I hope it will be peacefull. I come sometimes to read news from you, but I must recognize that if I remain very attached to you as people with whom I lived for 3 years, and who helped me all this time, I feel less and less…
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Funny but kinda sad
My dh can still go to restroom most of the time by himself. Never hits the potty so there’s pee all over the floor. He will always tell me he’s sorry. Every morning I fill the spin mop and add pine soil, then I’m prepared. Dh has see me mopping, today he decided he could clean up his accident. He was so proud of himself! I…
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has anyone had to deal with Alzhimers and lung cancer.
Peewee's Alzheimer's is progressing . He has started to believe that live in another town. and that his brother lives with us. He wakes up in the middle of the night and can't figure out where he is at, and wants to know where his brother is. I talked to his Cancer Doctor today and he says that the cancer can take him in 6…
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How long is it safe for him to drive?
My husband is 85, undiagnosed, but I suspect somewhere around Stage 3, and he loves to drive. He's always been a very skillful driver, and his skills and eyesight are still excellent. He knows the routes most commonly used to our most common destinations, but for anything new or not common, I have to guide him. What…
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A new behaviour(1)
My DH has been urine incontinent for a few months now. Lately he has bowel incontinence as well once in a while. His new "thing" is peeing on the floor around the house. His favorite spot is opening the deck door and peeing out the door and inside the door. The bedroom is another favorite spot, both sides of the…
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Unreasonable to expect?
For those of you with spouses/partners in care facilities. Is it unreasonable to expect aides to brush residents’teeth or stand by remind / assist? Is it unreasonable for them to suggest /assist one to put on pjs for sleep? My husband does neither on his own. It’s like after dinner he retreats to his room and just gets…
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From Jennifer to you
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Caregiver journey map
https://www.caregiving.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/Journey-Map_Book_v1.3.pdf
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mood enhancing meds- any suggestions or thoughts??
We saw DH's primary care doc today. He has been having leg edema. Doc decided to put him on a water pill and told DH that he wanted him to walk 100 steps after every time he went to the bathroom. His hope is for exercise and better circulation. I know this sounds good- but I will literally have to tell him that is what doc…
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A question about I want to go home
When your LO says, "I want to go home", I understand they are looking for Mom and Dad. If the house where LO grew up is nearby, do you take them there? We couldn't go in, but can easily drive by. Is it helpful, or create more issues than benefits?