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Calling for prayers
Ok folks . Sigh. My annual mammogram was flagged for “ possible mass” . My sister died from breast cancer and I have been thinking about her since I got the letter on Saturday. No one seems to think cancer right now but I’m going to get a diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound tomorrow morning. Many of you know my husband is…
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Change in diagnosis: what to do now?
Hello, friends, I have benefitted from your wise advice in the past, so I venture to ask again. My DH was first diagnosed with MCI in 2020. He is now 84 yo and was just diagnosed as now having mild dementia. Thanks to your advice, our DPOA is in order. We also have a will, although I'm guessing it may need to be changed so…
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This Message Board is so great
Just wanted to say how much I appreciate this message board and all the wonderful people who participate. We are all in a similar boat and that is so helpful to know. May peace be with all of us and our loved ones.
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Feeling the whiplash
I am not sure why I am posting this today. I am very sleep deprived, and not firing on all cylinders, and I am emotional and stuck and lonely. Ok then. The last week has been super-great. Everything has been easy. For some mysterious reason my gal has been sneaking off to use the bathroom without assistance, and she is…
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Which topic had this information.?
A few weeks ago there was a post on a topic that had started months earlier. I chose to follow the topic but don’t remember the name…it was a long compilation of items that others had found useful. Does someone know the topic? Specifically there was mention of a very simple telephone, and a TV remote also. How do I find it…
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No SNF will accept my combative husband
Last week my husband was coughing, sneezing, weak and unable to get out of bed so I called 911. After 12 hours in the Emergency Department he was admitted with a diagnosis of influenza A. After a week in the hospital his flu symptoms are improved, but on his third day of PT he can only stand for less than a minute and walk…
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help at home: when is it time for that?
I think many of you have kept your spouse/partner at home for as long as possible, yet some had reason (and means) to hire a helper/aide to assist with care or maybe just for company. Perhaps this started with just a few hours per week or per day and gradually ramped up. If this situation describes you at some point in…
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Looking for a support network
I'm new to this forum and my DH is moving from short term memory loss to dementia. He has no short term memory and needs supervision for most tasks. Not hygiene, feeding, etc, but other daily life - farm chores, running equipment, building, fixing things, trimming horses, et. He gets angry when I tell him what to do, so I…
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Please don't leave me!
My DW wakes up every morning crying and sobbing about not knowing where she is, wants to go home with her mom and dad who are long gone, but she also pleads with me to not leave her. I don't know if she senses that she's drifting away and will forever forget me at some point or she's just scared because she no longer…
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Items we found useful
M5M was looking for a thread that had a list of things we found useful during this caregiving experience, but couldn't find it. Neither could I. Let's make a new list for people to easily find. Things I can initially think of: (Please add to the list) High quality incontinence products. Parentgiving.com has some.…
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Sometimes I wonder. . .
I'm still new here and possibly a little naive when it comes to too much information. I know I'm with others that know the struggle is real so I've felt safe bearing my soul, sort of speak. but I wonder sometimes if I'm sharing too many private details about my life and struggles and then I remember I'm with all of you.
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“Don’t Forget Me”
That’s what my DW said to me a couple nights ago, as I was putting her to bed. I assured her I wouldn’t, and asked her not to forget me. Her reply? “I never will.” This, from my DW who doesn’t know my name or our relationship. Beautiful and heart-breaking. Reminds me, in a new context, of the Maya Angelou line that people…
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Update: DH is home
It has been a while since I posted, but wanted to give an update. I brought DH home on November 10th from the MCF. Hard to believe that was almost a month ago. When my daughter and I picked him up, they had not ordered refills on some medications and thank goodness my PCP placed orders immediately for meds that had run…
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Lost years--Off topic? Maybe not.
Just feeling reflective. Just got home from lunch with a work friend---first time in a restaurant, literally, since October 2019 (38 months), when my partner and I went to her 60th high school reunion. Tomorrow, going to see the Nutcracker with my daughter and granddaughter--what better way to see it than with a six year…
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Not sure how to cope
Recently my wife gets up from bed and starts the morning complaining about what I am doing, or how I am doing it or what I did not do. Every morning she is taking shots at me. She can no longer drive, her short term memory is very bad etc. I am doing my best to keep everything going, but it is hard to start off the day…
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Prosopagnosia
This is my first post on the website. My DW had a stroke seven years ago, and the cause was a buildup of protein in the brain (amyloid angiopathy). The doctors said that this it would more than likely lead to Dementia. I have been tracking her symptoms on a Dementia Severity Scale and have seen her move into a Moderate…
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Bedridden Opinion, Please.
Do you believe that once bedridden the loved one's health declines faster? I've noticed a significant decline over the five weeks my DH has been in bed. Less consumption of calories (2000 a week), more tired, more confusion, and difficulty of following directions are a few of the changes I've seen. Judi
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Best way to handle....?
Today, DH was at an event downtown, by himself. I had dropped him off and was waiting to hear from him that it was time to come pick him up. At around 4pm, he showed up at home, dropped off in front of the house from an unknown car (later found out it was a friend of his who drove him home). He walked in and after a bit,…
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Smoker with Dementia
My DH smokes. He used to drink quite a lot, but has given up all alcohol on his own in the past several months. Smoking is not something he has any desire to quit. I smoked right along side him until about 6 -7 years ago, I was able to give up the cigarettes for vaping. It may not be ideal, but it definitely better then…
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I'm going to challenge you
This thread might not get any replies at all, but here goes -- Just about everyone here will be forced to deal with a not so friendly situation, daily. Here's my challenge to you. When you have to deal with that situation, stop to think how you can respond to it in a way that might make it easier. This can even be done as…
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Choosing “my battles”
I’m realizing more and more that I need to accept the things I cannot change. With that being said I am waving the white flag to a few things that only seem to be an issue to me. So now I am working on not getting upset when DH sleeps till 9:30/10:00. Then sits around in his pjs until 1:00. He tells me it’s too cold to go…
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I'm new here(7)
Hi Everyone. Here's my story. My DH was diagnosed with Alzheimer's about 5 years ago. We are in the late middle stages. He also has a bunch of comorbidities, including insulin dependent diabetes, kidney failure, hypertension and all the others that go with them. I am his soul caregiver and have been for ever it seems. He…
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Nothing but a good thread
Tell me one thing good that has happened with or without your LO lately. It doesn't have to be earth shattering, just something positive. Friday evening, I went to see a high school BB game. One of our g-grandsons is on the team. They lost, but I got to sit in the bleachers with family and friends. I had to force myself to…
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Peewee has started eating.
For months now I have been trying to get Peewee to eat. He refused all food except a bite or two, but drinks all the Yahoo drinks he can stand. Since he was in the hospital and came home he has been telling me what he wants to eat, he can't always tell me the name of the food he wants but he can describe it to me. for…
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Caegivers that ask for advice
I'm still on here quite a bit even though my wife has passed on. What bothers me is ones' who ask for advice in life threatening situations and are given it and than we never hear from them again. LO getting violent and putting Caregivers' in danger. All I can do is keep them in my prayers. We are a big caring family here…
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How my husband escaped
Thank you all so much. I’ve learned a lot from this forum. And it helped to have the shared experience. Now it’s my turn to share. In 2015 my husband started having trouble with his executive function His father had dementia and so I knew it was the beginning of the end. A few years later we moved to a senior community…
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Dealing With Adult Day Care Refusal
I am working on a solution to help DH have a better quality of daily life while its still possible. He sleeps at least 10-12 hours per night, gets up to take his medication and assist with caring for the dogs, then goes back to bed. Some days he does not get up until mid to late afternoon, then he's still able to sleep all…
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Rough couple of weeks
My wife has been on a pretty effective med cocktail for about 3 months. That is about how long they usually last before her brain figures a way around them and returns to some of the behavior that got them prescribed. Hallucinations, agitation, confusion, depression, anger. all abated with meds slowly creep their way back…
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Finally Saw New Neurologist
Hello all: I had posted a few weeks ago about firing my DH neurologist and the issues I was having about my husband's care. We finally saw the new doctor, so far it is like night and day. The doctor spent 45 minutes with us and has determined that the symptoms that my husband is experiencing are not the type of symptoms of…
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Stuck (in the middle)
Just thinking about you this morning and realized no posts in a while. Hope all is well with you and your family.