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I need advice from my friends
My husband has always been close to his sister. We just talked to her Thursday on the phone. He has a hard time trying to take even for a few minutes. My problem, early this morning I got a call from our niece, his sister had a massive heart attack and currently she is on life support. The hospital is doing a last brain…
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Feeling so alone(1)
Hi everyone, It's so awful to feel so alone. One minute you have a companion, company, help, etc. and the next you are alone except for having another child, another responsibility. He did a lot here so on top of taking on caregiving there's that too. It's not really human the way I live anymore. Slave, maid, run down…
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Breaking things
I awoke this morning to find an African carved spoon, I collect African masks and art, broken and thrown into the garbage. My husband has started to yell, make really strange noises and smash things. I was too late getting to a well loved Korean mask, he had pitched it in the garbage. To say I was upset was an…
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Silent Seizures
DW has started having a few bouts of heighten confusion and agitation. These bouts generally don't last more than a few hours, rather than a continuous change. Thanks to this forum I suspected a UTI and checked with her PCP who ordered a through urinalysis with culture, and also extensive blood work. I was surprised to…
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Plan B(1)
Over and over we post and read about a Plan B for our loved ones. Today I read a post that brought me up short. All my paper work is in order but what about my Plan B? Gig Harbor has posted that she has a binder with all relevent info at the ready. I need to create one that contains all the info from bank to PCP to…
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My caregiver as told by his wife
Good Morning, My caregiver is my husband and has been by my side for almost 3 years. During this adventure, his mother passed away and was also her caregiver. That was 6 months ago and I don't think he has had time to grieve. My husband cooks complicated meals, because he enjoys cooking. I don't taste them and in fact, I…
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My second time around
Yes this is my second time around this block. I've been away for a while but now I'm back, the same broken heart and empty life as before. I first placed my love in MC in December of 2020,she was there before for 33 days and I missed her more than words con describe. One day on a face time call she looked at me and said;"I…
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13 on MoCa More Tests This Week
After 5 months wait, we finally had our appointment at the Medical University of SC memory clinic. I know DH has been progressing but I was shocked that he only scored 13 on the MoCa. His last test a year ago he scored 27. But last week he could not remember who the president is...he joked and said, "we don't have one."…
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DH cannot understand the words.
Hi all, I hope the new year is treating you and yours kindly. The world us such an uncertain place. Last night while watching a TV show, DH would sit and mutter a lot of swear words. He rarely swears and so I paid attention. I mentioned this was a series we had watched in the past and did he want to continue watching it…
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Finances and dementia
We quite properly talk about the legal documents required in a dementia case and yes they are important. But just as important is realistic financial planning. Dementia patients require supervision and eventually 24/7/365 care The cost of that care , one way or another, falls overwhelmingly on families unless and until…
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Animal care taken to the extreme--just venting.
This is just a vent. It's been a beautiful snowy day here today. My partner found a mouse in the chicken house--in a little front room where their food is stored in metal garbage cans. I think the mice come in from pipes around the sink--no chicken house is vermin-proof. Now she wants to go feed it because she doesn't want…
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@CStrope. O T
On another thread you mention putting a tracker on an email sent to see when it is read. How do you do this? I have AOL. Thank you. Iris
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I requested a hospice evaluation for DH and it is unsettling
I mentioned in recent posts that DH continues to decline. I realize it is the nature of the disease. Alzheimer's goes from bad to worse. I messaged the PCP. I provided my recent observations regarding ADLs and stated that DH has been falling. The PCP wrote a referral for a hospice evaluation. I know hospice is an option to…
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Home Health Care(2)
I am at the stage where I believe I need help here at home. I have read this was a good first step prior to having DH admitted to MC. I just can't watch his every move during the day and all night when he roams and gets into things. My question is how to select the best nursing organization for this. I am awaiting input…
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Emergency Contact?
New to this forum, and new to the realization of DH’s dementia behaviors (no diagnosis yet). I’m discovering things I haven’t thought of before. I need some medical care, scheduled next week, and for the first time, I don’t want DH to be my “Emergency Contact.” We are a couple with a combined 6 grown children, his- & hers-…
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Frustrated and Porn
I have a cold and a slight fever. I’ve been home all day since I wasn’t up to going to work. It’s not Covid. My husband just asked how long I planned on not going to work. I know he wants me out of the house so he can watch porn on the computer. He does not spend any money just scrolls around for about 30 seconds on a…
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Care Compare website
I'm not sure just how reliable this will be, but it looks interesting. You Can Now Compare Nursing Homes on Staff Turnover Rates and Weekend Help * January 13th, 2022 * * * * * The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) announced that it will add data on staff turnover rates and weekend staffing levels to…
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My first post
I am new here, I am unsure about where my DW is stage wise. She has not been evaluated by any medical folks. About 10 years ago I did some training with the local altzhiemers chapter as a pastor, I got lots of books and at that time I had some questions about my Dw. Please let me say this now, I do not consider myself a…
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A total win
Our front door was hanging off its hinges, I took one look at why, got a selection of my husband’s screwdrivers, some really long screws and proceeded to unscrew the top latch. My hubby was holding the door, while I sunk a huge screw into the frame, then I sunk the other screw into the bottom of the latch.The door now…
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Lady Texan(1)
I didn't want you to miss the post from Jo C. to your thread on hospice evaluation. Be sure to read it. It is excellent, and should help you.
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Nursing home labor shortage
https://www.elderlawanswers.com/worsening-nursing-home-staffing-crisis-taking-a-devastating-toll-on-residents-their-families-and-hospitals-18635?
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Married Still, but...
Hi all - I know this topic has been mentioned in this forum before. Has anyone come across a good reference site/book/etc. on the subject? My wife doesn't remember me or the kids or her brother, friends, etc. She may have some minute recollection - that I'm someone she might know - when she sees me at the MC when I visit…
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WTH???
What the hay? I couldn’t figure out where to post this musing... on the most recent “laughing to keep from crying” thread, or Lorita and friends’ legacy thread since that is literally the only place I can recall this topic being discussed regularly to my knowledge. But that doesn’t explain why DH has livestock on his mind…
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Are you willing to help me test this theory out?
If yes please add your comments here below and explain what and how you did it and the results you saw?
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Ice Cream and manic behaviour
I just had a really terrible night. Imagine a really bad night of wandering, manic behavior, and self-endangerment. After some hard thinking and connecting some dots from other threads, the two incidences I have had like this, nearly identical, had in common one major thing. Ben and Jerry's. No knock on B&J, I am a huge…
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Way Off Topic: Solar Panels
I shall remove this Thread fairly soon. We live in Southern California. My DH is wanting to put Solar Panels on our two story house. However; we are aging, and due to my husband's condition, I do not see us staying in our big house any longer than three to six years . . . ten at the outside most and that length of time…
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snack of the day
I wanted to make something special for DW, She has to be hand fed. I found I had some very dubious looking aging melted/ solidified chocolate chips; one big block in the bag. So I put it in a 2 cup Pyrex measuring cup, added a little butter , put it in the microwave and carefully melted it. Once it was melted I took a pint…
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Speaking freely
Hello DH was diagnosed officially November 2021 with EOAD, but showing signs for a year prior. He is early stages: still drives to a men's game group and volunteering. We have all papers, needs, and documents in order, and that is where I feel the burden. All decisions are on me: managing money, insurance, calendars,…
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Don’t know if I can make it to the end.
I haven’t been online in awhile, just slowly taking care of DH at home with the help of my AD and hospice. He is late stage 7, can’t walk, talk, feed himself, incontinent and mostly bed bound,. With the help of my dtr we can get him up and in a wheelchair and we use a Hoyer lift to put back in bed. He is quiet, not making…
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Update: He wet himself for the first time.
DH saw his PCP yesterday and he thinks he probably had a TIA. The Dr. listed about five different tests that he could do but said he didn't want to do a "full court press" unless we were committed to having surgery if necessary. We settled on just doing an MRI. That will be done next Tuesday. DH does not remember anything…