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The importance of acting
This is mostly for people new to the game. It is really important to put on a good face for your LOs because they will pick up any little signs of anger or negativity in your body language. If they do, your job becomes much harder. So if they're giving you a hard time, do your best to make jokes or otherwise lighten the…
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He speaks to the mirror
I know I' ve seen a post on this recently, but I can't find it. Today the caregiver sent me a video of my partner talking to the mirror and showing to his image the photo album I made for her, introducing family members. Since a few days, he has a lot of changes in his behavior. He is very angry and has aggressive…
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Rispiridone and the blues
My husband’s doctor prescribed rispiridone to control his wandering. It has helped somewhat, he is less combative and aggressive. However, he really is confused about night and day. He goes to bed around 4:30 pm and stays asleep until about 8 pm. He comes down and turns up the heat to 85 degrees. I am gasping from the heat…
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Hallucinations/Delusions
I have been reading posts a lot in the past year or so, but haven't posted much. I'm afraid I am going to be posting questions more often. My DH was diagnosed with MCI in 2014, then unspecified dementia in 2018, and Alz in April of 2021, he turned 66 in December. He seems to be declining quickly. Two days ago he called me…
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Risperidone vs Jekyll and Hyde.
I was at the end of my rope and called my husband’s primary physician for help. My husband has taken to waking me up at 7:45 am saying it is time to get up. The problem is that I am a night owl and treasure my peace at night, so not willing to forgo that time. The doctor put him on .25 risperidone twice a day. When it…
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Court RCourt rules Medicare Beneficiaries Can Appeal Switch to Hospital Observation Status
This could save you some big bucks if they go to a nursing home. https://www.elderlawanswers.com/court-rules-medicare-beneficiaries-can-appeal-switch-to-hospital-observation-status-18678?
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Outsiders
The Well Wishers are at it again. They want to help me. I need to ‘work’. We should ‘get help’. she will ‘be fine’. They don’t see that it all means nothing anymore. Not any of it. She is right here beside me now. She is warm and safe and sleeping. The day has ended, the meals eaten, the messes wiped away. Today's smiles…
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When He Falls: Assist or Not?
My DH falls (awaiting diagnosis—NPH? FTD?) He has at least MCI. Together we agreed to let him get himself up after a fall if he can. This made sense because I need to know if he can get himself up if he falls (sometimes I work in the yard, sometimes I take the dog for a walk or run an errand). We’ve watched…
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Catastrophically disabled butterfly wings
Curious how your quest for the priority group 4 classification is going. I spoke with Jim's doctor and social worker about this. Neither has heard of this classification. Today I spoke with Dr again who told me he is uncomfortable doing the testing required as He has not been trained in that. I told him I didn't want him…
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Music(1)
Every so often I'll take lines out of songs we all knew, and just use them in conversation. Something along the lines of "Close to you (I will always be)" or "I will always love you". I made a cake, and just finished icing it when I saw her coming in the kitchen because she always wants to be near me. I told her I just…
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Slightly revised (and completed) poem
First I want to thank everyone for their kind replies to the other thread. Writing is not who I am. I am a builder, a fixer, and put my arms around physical work. But a writer? No way! Anyhow here it is: A true story: She was sixteen In front of her house She stood waiting For what would probably be Her first time dating…
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To all the unspoken ones.
I know I am new still to this forum. So I just want to say to those who are on the sides just reading all the posts. I am glad that this forum is here and it's so open. I recently found out that two old friends from church have started on this journey. We are all in this together. I joined in 2018 and off and on read posts…
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Cataract surgery(2)
My dw was diagnosed with a cataract in one eye almost a year ago to the date. I just got the reminder it's time for a checkup. My dw doesn't want surgery especially involving her eyes. Lo and behold She started talking about what she needs to get her eye fixed, not knowing it's been one year. She gets crying when we talked…
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He didn't know me
This morning was a huge blow to me. It started out fine with a cup of coffee and watching the morning news. Then out of the blue came the questions I never saw coming like; Do you have family in town? Do you know my brother? Do you know his wife? Do you know my mother? How long have you lived here? Do you have dogs? And on…
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Started day care today
I took my dh to day care today for the first time. I'd been telling him he needed somewhere to go where he could be around people, and that I had "a friend" that might need some help. When we pulled into the parking lot and he saw the sign for Senior Services, he said, "I do not like this. One little bit." So I dropped him…
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update on omicron/covid
This is the best Ive got at this moment this is a nasty disease The omicron variant is "living up to " the predictions. Many more cases but a lower fatality rate and heavily concentrated among the non vaccinated adults. The success of vaccination in preventing death has been overwhelming. It is not Milder it just has a…
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Oh the vulgarity!
I am not a prude. My own language is occasionally laced with my favorite four-letter words. However, as my husband’s mind declines, his curses, references to brutal violence, and repetition of these grotesque images is more than I can take at times. I was talking about friends whose political beliefs differ from ours. DH…
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ABC123(1)
I don't think you've posted much about your parents lately, and they're always on my mind. Hopefully they are both hanging in there.
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Moving from one MC TO another
Has anyone done this? Moved their LO from one MC to a new one? Before my DW was admitted too MC we (I) planned a move from California to Idaho to be near my daughters. I felt it time to be close to family as we aged, (me 82, her 91). I bought a mobile home in Boise with the idea we would move there this spring. Her…
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Count it all joy?
My dw and I made it again to church although I had to kinda persuade her, she isn't wanting to go and always gets agitated , I think it's a self defense mechanism. Any way we have a church member who speaks most fifth Sundays. Today it was James 1:1-6 , 12. Many in our congregation are elderly and families are getting to…
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Happy Birthday ?
My birthday is at the end of January. 12 years ago we were in Thailand on a scuba diving trip. DW had just been moved from chief of system development to the senior medical advisor in her field for the whole agency. It was a promotion but she was still irritated. However it meant she could finally take real vacations and…
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Nutrition
My DW is now refusing to eat and not because she cannot swallow. She is drinking less water, which has always been a mainstay. I am scared, but gently encouraging by presenting food in different "manners". For example, I toast a piece of bread, cut it in to 4 sections and put different jams or butter on each. However this…
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Taking husband out to Lunch after placing in MC
Hello everyone, I am missing my husband terribly. At least I can visit him once a week for a half an hour to an hour. I am finding that it is just not enough. While he’s severely compromised, I’m really wondering if I can take him out and bring him to lunch somewhere and then bring him back. I’m terrified because I don’t…
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How do I talk to LO In denial?
Despite neurologist and doctors telling DH of his early dementia diagnosis. Therapist asked u have any memory problems? He says no ! He asks me why he is having therapy, putting patch on etc. Is it wrong of me to keep telling him that we r working on improving his memory? I don’t know what I should be saying to convince…
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Is this typical?
My DH will talk at length to any stranger. He rolls down the window and stop to speak to neighbors walking dogs and always days the same thing “I don’t trust people who don’t like dogs.” In restaurants he always tell the waiter he wants to be smarter and taller. He tips cashiers at Cracker Barrel and can talk for ages…
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Help breaking the news it’s time to move to assisted living
Hello all- I had a talk with my Lo’s neurologist the other day and he says it no longer safe for her to live alone. I agree. The only option I have is to move her into assisted living of some variety. We have discussed that this would have to happen in the abstract future, sadly that future is now. She is very aware and…
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Yellow Brick Road and an Anniversary of Sorts
8 years ago tonight we began our dementia journey with a visit to the ER for uncontrolled blood pressure, migraine headaches, and bloody noses same was causing. We had just been to our new doc the day before so the meds had not had time to kick in. His recommendation upon my messaging him about the continuing migraine and…
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My first ever attempt at poetry
And it is a work in progress. Trying for more of an ending. A true story: She was sixteen In front of her house She stood waiting For what would probably be Her first time dating But as luck would have it He didn’t show I happened by And said “Hello” Almost two years later, we got married Another two years, and a bundle of…
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Lady Texan, how are you?
Just checking in. You have been on my mind a lot. Hope things are going as well as possible.
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front door flashing privates
Help! What can I do to get my husband from standing at the front door and flashing and playing with his privates to everyone who is driving or walking by. We live in a rural community with house real close and a lot of people out walking or driving by. I've tried distracting but he is so focused that there is nothing I can…