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Need to move to Assisted Living facility
I am new I am new to this group and am having issues with my sister who was recently diagnosed with moderate dementia towards Alzheimer's. It has been advised by 2 doctors she not live alone, as she is now, mama but she refuses to move out of her home. She currently lives alone and I am Checking on her every day to make…
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What will I remember?
Am I doomed to remember DW primarily as someone with a progressing dementia? Of course intellectually, superficially, I can remember the wonderful way she was before this terrible dementia. But at a deeper level the emotional memory I seem be developing is that of a great sadness for her, almost pity that she can no longer…
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Anger From DW Over Being On Her Computer
My wife has ES~MS of dementia, which means she functions fairly well a good deal of the time. She has made contributions (using her laptop) that she said were "small", that I see on our CC statement are large. She has enough contributions that it amounts to $10K or more a year, at this point. Sometimes when one calls she…
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Easygoing husband now punching staff and more
My poor husband who’s been in memory care for 4 months now has become angry and violent toward both staff and residents. A couple of weeks ago a staff member had to go to the ER because he was whipping her around until her shoulder became sprained. The staff put him on an increased dose of Risperidone which I read can…
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My husband died over a year ago
I ran into an old friend of his today at a local store. He asked me how he was. I told him he has died. He was shocked, but I could have sworn I have already told him this. All of his past acquaintances always act shocked. I feel bad, but it's like if you don't want to know, don't ask. I also buried a favorite Uncle two…
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Tasks and house rules for home care aides?
We have finally found a reliable home care aide it appears, after several months of the agency not having anyone to send, or no shows. For someone coming in 20-30 hrs a week, what are the tasks and guidelines you have set for home help that you recommend? DH is Stage 6d with anosognosia, very mobile and a wanderer. I…
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Stressful couple of weeks
The last time I wrote it was about what a great day we had on Thanksgiving. Unfortunately, that was the last great day we've had. We have four children. The two older sons are mine and the youngest son and daughter are ours. DH has never gotten along with my oldest son. He seems to have always seen him as a rival even…
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44 years ago today
44 years ago today, my wife and I made our vows to each other and became man and wife. It was a sunny and warm day for December in the Hudson Valley, much like it was today. (50s) Although our wedding party was small, many people came to watch the ceremony, since my wife’s family was well known in town. All brides are…
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Another step down.
Starting at 12:30 am on Wednesday morning my mil started the first of two falls and 2 bed slips in 16 hours. Her balance is gone. Her desire to pace is not. Her ankle and knee are swollen. She’s hit her head twice. She’s going to walk until she falls and can’t walk anymore. We’ve resorted to putting the mattress on the…
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Wants me to call police
One of the delusions DH has had for almost a year is that people are living in our attic at dusk by coming in through the crawlspace and going through a non-existent hole straight to the attic and then leaving at dawn and then has added a girl living upstairs (which we don't often use) who has a man coming to visit who…
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not swallowing all his water
DH is bedbound. We raise his hospital bed up when he eats and drinks. Yesterday and today, when given water which he drinks through a straw, some of the water came back out running down his chin. He takes longer to eat now and chews and chews every bite, as if he's eating a tough piece of meat, no matter what it is. Is…
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Looking for more advice/opinions
My DH ended up being sectioned walking into neighbors homes, yelling and trying a few times to throw me physically out of home… Had delusions…. After a brief stay in geriatric psych, I had to place him in memory care because he wasn’t ready for home. He was insisting I was not his wife and had a few delusions. While at MC,…
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Recommended Annual Screening
I spoke with Nurse Practitioner at DH’s endocrinologist office - she is the closest thing we have to a primary physician - shared my concerns about his mental and neurological status. I asked that it be confidential as he is already sort of paranoid. There is testing she is going to recommend at his 3 month visit next week…
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Paris20
In another thread, you said "The other night, my husband sat bare-@ssed on our bed. By the time I told him not to do that, it was too late. I had to change all the linens and do a wash at midnight. " I just wonder if you're familiar with layering the bed? If you layered it, you wouldn't have to wash at midnight. If you're…
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I don't understand(1)
Talked to the neuropsychologist today about last week's testing. Although DH tested in the moderate to severe memory loss category in Nov, he did well last week. Scores were in the average to below average range. She feels he is very depressed. He sleeps 20 hours a day and has lost interest in everything. So I understand…
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Dangerous Delusions
The other day while I was at work one of my neighbors told me there were two police cars in our neighborhood. There was a report that someone was out brandishing a gun but they found nothing. According to my DH though, the police were there because our neighbors 16 year old son across the street was driving too fast,…
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A Dementia Travel Tale of Mirth and Woe
Getting to our coast house is now a lengthy trip, because we located to a house far, far away to conserve funds and be near a family support system. I break up the 12-hour trip with a stay in Reno. On our most recent trip, I reserved a room (using my daughter’s generous employee hotel discount) with a king bed. I know my…
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End of a Chapter
My DH, passed away Dec. 9, in his sleep, by my side. There was no indication that anything was different that night. I am numb.
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Urination
Oh my...we are having our living room completely remodeled so had painting done and all pictures off the walls in living room and hallway etc. I put some of the pictures on the floor in our bedroom as paintings etc will go back on the walls once our new furniture comes. We had several cloth designs from Viet Nam which we…
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Tracking Device(2)
My wife’s home care nurse suggested I obtain a GPS tracking device for her to wear if she ever leaves the house on her own so that me or the authorities can find her. The device should also have fall detection. Anybody heard of such a gadget? She also suggested that I obtain an alz med-alert bracelet for her with name,…
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Sorry I have forgotten
You may think I am talking about my partner who has Alzheimer ? But no, I talk about his son ! Today I had to leave at 5am for a phD defense in the south of France. Everything was organized. My son was at home this night and had to leave after 8am, the first caregiver arrives at 8am and manages the morning routine and the…
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Does anyone have experience with bidets
I'm seriously considering a bidet. My wife told me she would not use one, but it might be worth a try. Does anyone have a LO who never used one before dementia? How did it go? Which one do you have, and what are the pros and cons? I know we need a heated bidet, and a warm wash that is consistently warm.
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vent: the trail of turds
Last evening, I came down with a fever. I told DH that I needed to rest. He was fairly annoyed that I would not be waiting on him hand and foot. But I felt rest was best. At 3:30 am, DH decided it was time to get up. We got up and I got him coffee and a smoke. He was annoyed his programs were not on yet. I explained that I…
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Non verbal behavior
Hi, new to this site. My loving partner of 41 years was officially diagnosed with dementia 09/21 while in the hospital due to alcohol induced pancreatitis. He also has Sundowners and it was explained to me that he used alcohol to calm himself down. We have just started the dementia journey as he has had a high level…
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Some days(1)
Some days this is how How I think of Alzheimer's Photo by DW Rhinos are vegetarians They kill critters they can't eat.
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To get tested or not?
I had my husband tested by his primary doctor (he didn't know I asked). She told me he did pretty good, then in his patient portal she diagnosed MCI. I have seen others tested who did well when it was obvious there was a problem. He was very upset after the appointment and said he would never get another "brain test"…
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Just need to talk to my friends (160)
Hi, Hated to start a new part of the thread when the discussion on EMV, CMV, Covid, the new variant and so many other things were going so good. But, it's past time so losing posts will begin to happen more frequently. Dr. Fauci has been on almost all of the news shows this morning - he seems a bit worried about the new…
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Does your MC facility hand feed your LO?
DH needs more than just a little assistance eating. Sometimes he has to be hand fed the entire meal. This has been going on for 4 weeks now. The MC staff have told me that they can't technically feed residents, just assist. However, they are feeding him breakfast. Otherwise, I'm going in twice/day to feed him lunch and…
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I recommend the following
I don’t like to recommend things that I can not prove. But after taking these for every long time they have been safe. I also believe they are helping along with the other drugs I take. No one will ever know if this combination works but I did a lot of studding and many do agree that there is some possibility. The ways I…
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How to determine when no longer advisable to leave LO alone
I have been wanting to present this topic to the group for several days to get your input. I thought I still had time. I would leave for an hour or 2 to do errands, visit a friend, etc, always leaving a note on where I am, when I will be back and my cell number. Today was to be a picnic with a friend for 2 hours. After…